How do I deal with fecal explosions?

What about a pair of scissors handy to cut down both sides of the depends to remove them? I just recently came upon that handy tip!! Can be fairly small scissors, at that!

When I posted it was late and I was running out of battery so I hurried and forgot two things I wanted to mention. While this probably won't help you it could help someone else. Trip Training. You take the person in question to the bathroom on a schedule. In my sons case when we were retraining we started with every hour. After a while with no accidents you extend the time; we would make a shorter time for after meals but eventually were able to stretch it to every 3 hours. It is believed by the devopers of this method that a persons body will adjust to "knowing" to go at these intervals. Of course this method does not account for funky foods that may upset the tummy or illness like the flu. And if you happened to be away from a bathroom when it's time the person may still go. Second - and this addresses more of the dementia aspect and Depends. And actually this is the reason I found this site in the first place - looking for a solution for this: when my mom first started with depends it was for urine incontinence and dementia wasn't really a factor. Now she is fecal incontinent as well and much further along with dementia. Now if she tries to change a poop accident she somehow manages to get poop EVERYWHERE! All over her and all over her living areas - in places you can't even fathom how it was possible. The only solution to this was to take the task of changing her depends from her by way of round the clock care.

Your dad is not able to function safely alone. He needs care and the fact that he is not able to realize that only points out how ill he is. There are various approaches that can be taken, but I would sit down, make a plan and then get him help. It may not be with his support, but it can be done eventually. You may:
contact social services to see what he qualifies for regarding protection for his welfare and financial resources; discuss it with his doctor- what your dad is doing is quite risky for his and other's health, contact a lawyer regarding guardianship and meet with the entire family and come up with an alternative.

I would not leave him alone at any time. You may need to accompany him to the bathroom every time to ensure hygiene is being used. His condition will progress, so getting him help will have to be done sooner or later. It sounds like the health risks in your home require it sooner.

He has dementia it's not going to get better.. He has no control over his actions...

My favorite quote:

"The dementia patient isn't giving you a hard time,
HE is having a hard time"...

I would not leave him alone... I would spend the family funds on a caregiver or look into getting him in a NH..

You have enough to do working full time... I would seek professional help..

Good luck... I know it's not easy....

Believe it or not my husband - in fun, calls me Queen of the Poopies! My son has severe autism - he was not fully potty trained until he was 12 yrs old. Then he had a serious accident and was in the hospital for 6 weeks - we came very close to losing him twice. He had two emergecy surgeries and a long recovery. During this time he completely lost his bathroom skills and we didn't get him back to where he was before the accident until he was 21 yrs old. He is non verbal and functions at about a two yr old level. So I pretty much changed diapers almost every day for 21 years. We have two small long hair dogs that are diarrhea prone. Some days when hubby would walk in the door from work I'd say "if you feel like you need to go - go ahead and take a sh** here on the living room rug, everyone else has today!" So I feel your pain! First you've got to get the man into Depends! Buy him a pack - they come in the color gray now and are trimly cut and not bulky. If he sees they don't resemble diapers he might be more open to trying them. I have thrown away diarreha soaked pants not being able deal. Next - change his diet. Get more fiber in him. If he won't eat it voluntarily buy Benefiber - it's a powder that can be mixed in food without changing the foods taste or texture. Avoid greasy foods at all costs! Buy surgical type gloves - Costco sells a two box pack of about 600 gloves for $20. While at Costco by Clorox Wipes and baby wipes. Gloves and Clorox wipes make poopy wall/floor clean up much more tolerable and gloves and baby wipes make poopy butt clean up more tolerable. Get med size garbage cans with lids (I like the type you open with your foot on a peddle) if your able to get Dad to use the Depends. Buy lots of garbage can bags while at Costco, as well. Make sure Dads room and bathroom have their own cans. Empty the bags - tied off - as frequently as you can. Do not wait for the bags to get full or your house will smell like an outhouse. Buy a good quality air oder eliminator - not a cover up. Poopy flowers? Eeeweee! Keep a large garbage can with lid, filled with bleach water in prep for icky cloths. Label it and remind dad why it's there. If you think it might work have a can/lid with liner labeled "poop" if you think theres a chance he will shake it out. Of course these two things would not be needed if you got him to wear Depends - unless they leaked - which does happen. Be sure you are keeping an eye on his bedding. And lastly - I missed this in my mother but the whole not showering thing is an early sign of dementia so you're gonna have a battle there but I've read lots of threads here on how to address that too. Good luck to you.

He refuses to see a doctor, been two years (mom died two years ago today). I made an appointment which he cancelled when they called to verify. He thinks he's fine and won't allow help from anyone. He won't even let me take care of him aside from feeding. He's gross; I don't want to go near him. Other family won't help including my brother. I can't even get him to do my father's nails or shave him. He doesn't think I need help since my father doesn't really do anything and can still walk from bed to recliner to toilet (although not fast enough!). Hiring help would empty out the family money too. It's hard to fear sorry for him because he was so abusive all my life. There was never any affection.

It is so understandable that you would not be able to continue with your job requirements. Don't beat yourself up, but do attend to this right away.
Again, get help.

So you never know when you are coming in contact with e-coli, and neither does he. Step up the cleaning, use bleach and spray lysol on door handles.
Ask the doctor if contact (hands, mouth, eating) can cause fecal explosions.
Get the treatment for that.
Get help. You can get ill. Use gloves and a mask.

The reality here is that he can no longer be left alone while you are at work. It would be better all around if he was in a nursing home where there are nurses and aides with him 24/7. Until then, I would ask him to just throw the stuff in the bathtub and be sure there is a handheld shower for him to rinse himself off.
Ask his MD to order a bath aide for him at least once a week.