How can I stop dad from calling son stupid, etc?

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"yep, I;m stupid, and I learned all about being a man from you"...
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I agree with LivingSouth. If son is willing and this is hurting him, I would suggest that he stop caregiving and let the name caller fend for himself.
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I think the son should go on a nice trip and let Dad fend for himself for a while - might get a little more gratitude and respect.
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Im' sorry, I misread this--The Dad is the perpetrator! Yikes.... Even so,
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A visit from APS Adult Protection Services might be the thing the son (caregiver) needs.... Sometimes a little accountability for our actions goes a Long Way.
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Get you and them together and have a discussion about the issue, get all to agree to stop it and then have the remind his dad as one post said here, "I got it from you" Stop being offended and make light of it knowing this is just your elderly father who could be acting out his fear of being elderly and nearing his end of life. Hope this helps. God bless you for your care. If this doesn't stop or you can't/won't put up with this then let him know you won't help him any more.
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thank you so very much
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Cathy I'm in the UK where we have a few sites to choose from, and I can say hand-on-heart that I haven't found a better one than AgingCare. The individuals here are amazingly knowledgeable and supportive, and - perhaps because it is an American site? - the attitude is refreshingly positive. There are quite a few chaps contributing: you might like to suggest to the son that he logs on and has a look round. Or, you could try searching for topics you think might be relevant and show him the discussions.

It depends how you think he might feel about opening up about things. It can be difficult and painful to acknowledge that there is a problem in the first place - does he, do you think?
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The son might benefit from talking to a therapist or counselor.
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thank you so much for your thoughtful answer. your points are well taken. i will focus on supporting the son. are there any other good caregiver websites.
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