How can I get my husband to accept care from anyone other than me?

It may be time to consider placement, even if just for respite. It is honestly not humanly possible to be there every second. You must level with him and tell him that it is not an option, that you need help, that the tasks are now too much for you. Be honest. Tell him that the help is not for him, but for YOU. Because ultimately that is the truth. So sorry for all you are going through. If he won't go out to her house, then you must have her come to sit for you and YOU go out of the house. Even if it is out to a motel, a movie, a dinner, and back the next day.

My Dad was the same way. He was firing new caregivers faster than I could hire them.

then, the sister of a friend (a professional caregiver) did this...

she came over over and started to organize all the books. Told my Dad..she is here to help organize the place. For an hour or so, she was busy...I offered her a cold ice tea...offered to my Dad too. So we three sat around and she was talking to my Dad and he was laughing. Next day we did the same...after another chat session, he mentioned he never gets to go to Walmart...she offered to take him....and off they went.

the next day, Saturday, she didn’t come and my Dad was looking for her....all weekend. On Monday, she just slid into the caregiver roles with no fuss.

so...just being someone in...but tell him it is for some other reason. Let him have time to get used to her...let him get to know her.

Senior Day Care might be an option, sometimes a caretaker just has to take the bull by the horns and do it.