How can I get and find help?

Hm. Well, some snap responses spring to mind - like, those who don't want to put their mothers in care shouldn't expect others to do the caring - but most of them are quite rude and this is a respectable forum.

Would you like to outline the history a bit more? How did your MIL come to need care, what did you and your wife discuss about her coming to live with you, is the workload panning out more or less as you anticipated, that sort of thing.

Hello... Thank you for your fast responses. I don't know what to ask. This journeyhas been rough and it's getting harder. Wife is not willing to put her mother in a care home. I have very little support. My wife works long hours and all I want to do is talk to her when she comes home and all she wants to do is relax and doesn't care to talk.

Talk to us, David.   We are listing.   Post as many new questions as you want, we are a store house of information. And vent as much as you want, we pretty much have been in your shoes ready to give you suggestions that had helped us along this elder journey that we have have no training to assist.