I am his medical and durable POA. He is retaining 1500cc of urine in his bladder after voiding, and it will soon cause kidney damage. He is "with it" enough to understand this but he finds the indweling catheter intolerable and threatened to pull it out when he had one placed, and stated "it is better just to die than wear this".
So I went back to the hospital and had the nurse deflate the balloon and remove it properly, and she told me to get medical POA (which I already have). I am wondering about this nurse's comment: even though I can legally enforce that he wear a catheter, he may do some serious physical damage pulling it back out again if he doesn't want to wear it. And guardianship is obviously not an option because he is competent although moderately demented. He is living in a locked memory care unit with a 24/7 charge nurse so catheter maintenance is not at issue here.
More details: This catheter is meant to be worn only one month while the urologist assesses if he is a candidate for surgery (cystometrogram, cystoscopy, kidney imaging) and to prevent kidney damage.
This blockage is caused by prostate enlargement (BPH) which has been medically treated with 5mg finasteride and 2 flomax for 3 months to no avail. He was diagnosed with BPH years ago and was taking 1 flomax daily the whole time. This is probably more detail than anyone wants to read but just in case anyone is thinking there it can be medically treated.
So the family doctor was following the BPH for years. My Dad finally complained of bedwetting (really out of character for him because he is embarrassed by it) so I immediately took him in for a workup and he got referred out to a urologist.