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I am up all night, and sleep for about six to 7 hours every morning from 5am to 12pm. Obviously, this is not optimal, however this was a job as all of you know that kept me going and going until I had severe burnout the beginning of September. I knew she was going to pass, and was starting to get a caregiving team going, and had one in place. Her health deteriorated very fast, so that never came to be. However, my husband and I (we were really the only people she knew), I met one family member at midnight before her death.

Is this usual. I am pretty seasoned in this business (9 years), and have had more people want to hire me, and I am really taking my time, because It has only been two weeks, and I did not have a break not two days for 7 months. This does feel like I am tired, it is because I really miss her. As grumpy as she could be, I realize she was very sick, I loved her, and in the end, she has put me and my husband in her will. The day before her death, she kissed me, said she loved me, and was so thankful I was the only one and my husband once a week, that would sit with her hours on end. She was very weak when she said that, and then she closed her eyes while I was with her, and that has had a profound effect on me.

Also, I found out, as her Attorney is her POA, and I am the ONLY one that knew anything about her accounting, and I was doing it, and so not only was I working with her 8 hours a day, I came home at night to be and House Manager for her life and bills. So this obviously was just too much. That being said, the bottom line, I found her as a client, we worked through our issues, and she finally accepted me, and hugged me the day before her death and said she loved me very much.

Now, I still have a few clients, but decided to take on small one day jobs, not something that will fill my life with all of the emotions of the caregiving, although I love caring for our people that need help.

I am focusing on my mother again (volunteer of course), and that has been extremely rewarding at night. 2 hours each night, as she is in late stage Alzheimer's and my father is in late stage PPA (Primary Progressive Aphasia).

Sorry for the sentence structure and the mixing around of statements.

Any advice on how to deal with this?

Thank you to all for the support you have given me.

There are people in this world that are meant to do this type of work, I believe I am one of them!

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does not feel like I am tired "I must be now though it is 5:38am"
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LLF, you truly have a gift for giving of youeself to benefit another. As your client passed, you continued to be there for her. Even at that time the family finally recognized what you had done for her. It must be an extraordinary family as this does not happen in many families that have a family caregiver. You had an extraordinary situation and I hope when you are ready that you find another similar opportunity. It will happen when it is meant to. Be patient and naturally you will grieve. Good job!
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It's grief, you loved, and the price of losing someone you loved is pain. Feel it, do'nt run away, let it make you stronger, more loving, and happy. Laugh, cry, whatever it takes. Give yourself some time to grieve.

Your services, as a caregiver are much needed. We need your advice, experience and love, here. Keep us informed how you are doing.
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Wow! What a time you have had lately. As a caregiver, you have given everything to that old lady. Now it is time for your parents. Don't you think you should ease up on yourself and take a well-earned rest? With caregivers, we have to look after ourselves to avoid burnout. Keep us informed on how you are going.
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Thank you Ariene . . . .and now, after this, I have stepped away from elder care and thought it would be good to do a nice relaxing housekeeping job, and I was and their dog bit me, it is an amazing world.

thank you for your kind remarks. it is people like you and jeanne and pam and many many others here that are the reasons I return for assistance.

dh
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God bless you and keep you safe. You did a good job and you will recover in time.
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