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My sister and I care for our older sister (5 yrs). We hired an agency to help provide in-home care for about 4-5 hrs/day. My older sister has had 3 strokes and is physically able to manage, but since she fractured her left arm years ago. It never healed properly so she can't use the left hand/arm (can't open jars or hold any weight). She is a diabetic and cant properly understand the numbers on her insulin pens so needs help with that. Both my sister and I have been managing the agency communications, medications, doctors appointments for the past 5 years. I dispense all the meds. The agency's job (caregivers) is to see that she takes thyroid, and to change out the needles and reset the insulin pens to the proper dose. The agency's nurse has now decided to monitor some of the meds like thyroid and has been interfering with various doctors' recommendations causing havoc because there are disagreements between doctors as to which thyroid meds are appropriate but my sister is indeed happy with each doctor despite their disagreements. This nurse is forcing issues and bothering the doctors and us just because she has the power to do so. HELP! I don't know where to turn - we have removed thyroid from the caregivers tasks but removing her from having caregivers double checking the insulin pens is impossible. We have gone thru so many agencies in past 5 years because there are so few caregivers so cant move again. Is there some licensing bureau I could check this nurse up or some way to get her off this case. I'd surely appreciate help. Thank you so much. Raissa

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Why is a nurse even involved if all you are doing is hiring an aide?

I would encourage you to have her primary doctor write a letter to the agency owner addressing the conflict of their orders.

Best of luck. So many people nowadays think they are the smartest person in the room, no matter who's in the room with them.
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Raissa Jun 4, 2025
Yes good idea for the doc to contact the owner and address some of these issues.. and yes the nurse does feel shes the smartest one - except there are about 3 caregivers who have been 'delegated' by her for the insulin. The latest one said" isnt she just the most anal-retentive obsessive compulsive person you ever met - and she causes so much trouble for all of us caregivers - wish I never met her"
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There should only be one Doctor in charge of her thyroid medications and thats her endocrinologist. Thats their specialty. Her PCP should not be overriding the endocrinologist or any other doctor. If they have a problem they call and discuss it with the endocrinologist.

The Nurse, she should not be fooling with the endocrinologists orders. She does not have the ability to make decisions concerning meds. The aides, unless certified, cannot dispense meds. They are not medically trained. They can remind a client to take their meds and give them the pill planner or bottle but they cannot hand them to the client. Nor can they give injections.

Do you need this nurse for anything, like giving a shot? I would talk to the owner/administrator of the agency and either request the nurse no longer come or that she stick to just what she is there for. That she is not needed to get involved with sisters doctors concerning the medications she is given. I would make sure your not paying for this nurse.

This Nurse does not have the POWER. Get that out of your head right now. She is an employee from an agency your sister is paying for. She is coming into your sisters home. Your sister has the say in how her health is handled. Your sister can ask her to leave. Your sister can ask her to please stop calling her doctors. The Nurse can suggest that maybe Sister should have her meds re-evaluated by her endocrinologist because she feels something should be changed. Sister can allow her to talk to her doctor. Really, wonder how the Nurse can talk to the doctors without verbal or written permission from your sister?

Did your Sister assign POA to you or anyone? If not, I would get it done. Just one person for both financial and Medical, and make it Immediate. There can be a back up if the primary passes or cannot carry on their duties. The POA should be the one who lives closest and does the most. As an Immediate POA, you can step in and take over for sister. If she is still cognitive, she can still make decisions but you can step in and deal better with this stuff for her.

I worked as a secretary for Visiting Nurses. After a nurse stepped over the line with a Client, we were all brought into a meeting and told...when you enter someones house remember its their home. You are there to carry out a doctors order, thats it. You can stay and talk for a while because u may be the only person they see that day, but thats it. I don't remember what this nurse said but the Client did not appreciate it and asked for a different nurse.
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Raissa Jun 4, 2025
Thank you JoAnn: Thank you for your response. Yes my sister has a POA for my older sister for both financial/medical. but that doesnt seem to matter to the agency. According to State law once you sign onto an agency you sign over some rights particularly if the client needs ANY med help: this seems to be the segway to jurisdiction. My older sister(the client) has been a diabetic for 50 years and has managed meds herself- however, with the strokes she cannot properly see the numbers on the insulin pens - so thats the help she needs (gives herself the injection)- setting it and resetting the pens 2x/day (nor can she make proper discriminatory judgments) One of the issues was that when we did have the caregivers dispensing the thyroid meds (putting it from one container to another because she forgets to take it so I set up a system which seemed to work) the nurse got into the fray between 2 doctors- which was outside of her jurisdiction anyway as I'm seeing here on these answers. So as of about 2 weeks ago we took thyroid off the caregivers list of things they're responsible to do. As of now the caregivers only need to handle the insulin, changing out needles, setting the pens to the proper numbers given by the endo.. I am on the portals related to the various doctors' practices and this agency nurse apparently can see our discussions: I dont know how that happens. Is she able to have access?? We contacted these practices specifically to address these issues and -Wow, some doctor didnt look at the notes made by their nurse in charge considering our complaint And spoke to this agency nurse regardless of the notes.... So I guess we need to pursue these practices and insist on more assiduous attention given to privacy!! But like I said - this agency nurse insists on her ability to invade everything...And if we dont like it we can change agencies. But we have already been thru about 3 agencies in past 5 years and it doesnt help my older sister to have so many changes in caregivers. We have been very lucky since we've been with this agency and the most stability in 5 years- except for this issue
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Call the owner of the agency.

Tell the owner or franchise owner that caregivers or nurses do not do meds at your house and do not call doctors.
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Raissa Jun 4, 2025
Hi - and thank you . We will call the agency owner but we are caught - as Ive stated in my response to JoAnn - because we dont want to go elsewhere and the caregivers here are quite good for my sister in comparison to prior agencies. We started nearly at the time the pandemic hit and it was really tough. Also as i stated before they were doing (but no longer) thyroid meds; moving them from one container to another so my sister could actually see this container. But since this interference with the nurse we changed that and my sister has a renewed will to get it right because she sees this terrible disturbance going on... we will see. But the remaining issue is insulin: my sister infrequently willy nilly used to change the quantities on insulin so we felt the outside control was necessary here....
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Response to your reply to me.

"According to State law once you sign onto an agency you sign over some rights particularly if the client needs ANY med help:"

The nurse maybe a mandated reporter. I can see the med help. Maybe nurse feels the dose is not correct or maybe should be dropped. Maybe Sis signed something giving the Nurse the right to call the doctors, but she is stepping over the line I think.

IMO, no the Nurse should not have access. If she does, how would she get the password? I don't think doctors office could give her access without a HIPPA form signed by your sister allowing access. Does sister use the portal, or just you? Change the password.

I think you have an over zealous Nurse who is overstepping boundries. Just let sister know she has rights and can use the word NO. The law also says you can't make a patient or client do what they don't want to. Remember, this agency is being hired by sister and coming into her home.
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Raissa Jun 6, 2025
Thanks much JoAnn for your supportive experience here. We will followup with your suggestions and No my elder sister does not do portals and would not have told the nurse anything because she does not like her due to the invasiveness she feels from the nurse. So yes we need to gently ! contact the agency (who is thrilled to have this nurse!) to assert our rights here which are being trampled on by an overzealous medical operative - One needs this kind of support from others... in order to have the strength to go forward gently
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The agency may be thrilled with this nurse but your sister is not. My Dad had rehab at home. This was a man who was King of his Castle. Mom waited on him hand and foot. He was a carmudgeon. By this time my Dad could hardly walk. The physical therapist came barreling in the house and said he was going to get up and start walking. Mom said she was like a drill sargent. Not with my Dad. He told her no woman was going to tell him what to do. The therapist discharged him right there. He did get another therapist who he liked. He had in home before and I think one of the nurses was on his side.
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I cannot see how strangers from all around the country would be able to intervene in this situation involving nurses, doctors and family. I really don't. I don't understand why there is a nurse involved in administering medications if this is something family has typically done? And I cannot fathom how in the world any nurse would negotiate conflicting orders from several MDs arguing over medications. Whole situation sounds quite impossible to me.
I am sorry and wish you much luck.
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Raissa Jun 4, 2025
Again thanks for your interest: When this interference first became an obvious issue about 2 months ago, my other sister who is the POA etc etc had to deal with this nurse because I couldnt handle the frustration and anger her actions caused. As Ive stated here in other responses we are sort of bound by the rules the agency establishes regarding meds. So as you can see here Ive changed the thyroid - because that was the incipient cause of her interference. I handle the other about 10 meds and have for 5 years: our relationship with these docs is terrific and when my sister (client) had a symptom which I felt the endo should be able to deal with and didnt I went to the primary (PCP) who handled it. Thats what this nurse is throwing in everyone's faces. But as youve stated its not her job, nor jurisdiction. However, the primary care's substituting doctor decided to ignore our prior discussions and address whatever issues he felt was appropriate with this agency nurse - AND telling us it's confidential!!!!!
so now that too has to be handled. Its just a mess.
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First of all, I have zero experience with home health care, so feel free to ignore me completely! Is this the only nurse in the agency? Can you request a different nurse? If not, then ita with the others who recommend speaking to the owner/manager of the agency. What that nurse has been doing just doesn't seem right. :(
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