Has this site changed it's venue?

Elaine,

Thanks for the complement. I appreciate it but I am quite sure that in trying to offer support to someone that I haven’t always given the correct answer to those posting for answers to their questions.

None of us are going to have the magic answer to every question, even if it’s well meaning advice.

I think most people are sincerely trying to help and do care, otherwise they wouldn’t want to be involved in a site like this.

If we run into disputes sometimes it’s best not to feed them ammunition to fire back at us. I went through enough of that in my family with my mom and brothers. I reached my quota of dealing with foolishness. Surrendering from the chaos is liberating! It was completely exhausting and futile to continue a relationship with my brothers.

Thank you for being the voice of reason Needhelpwithmom. Your answer sums it up perfectly.

There will always be a variety of topics because everyone has different circumstances. There isn’t always a one size fits all answer.

My motto is live and let live as much as possible. Unless people are extremely rude, everyone is entitled to their own opinion. I think it’s fine to present a different side and I certainly don’t expect everyone to agree on everything. That’s impossible. I like seeing an opposing view because it gives me the opportunity to learn and appreciate that we are all different. What works for some won’t work for everyone.

Differences can be interesting. I have always socialized with people who have a variety of personalities. We don’t have to be carbon copies of each other. We can still be compatible with those with differing opinions.

People shouldn’t get their feelings hurt if someone doesn’t agree with them about their advice. It may not be the right fit for them. I just hope that the OP finds something that is helpful to them no matter who gives the advice. It’s not personal.

Why and HOW do I miss all the fun. I am sorry to have missed that. I find this site overall full of good information. I think the questions get repetitive when you are here a while. How often can you go through the whole UTI thing? But overall I love it.

See what you started, Abby?!?

I'm relatively new on this message board, but I think the "controversial" stuff should be left in the Discussions. Too much bickering on the Questions side, which might cause threads to be completely abandoned by the OP.

CWillie and Sendhelp are on the top 25 valuable members list.

😉

Some people seem to always need to have the last word, after a while you can recognize and avoid them, or at least avoid joining a continuing debate. The mods allow pretty much anything here and seem to be really reluctant to step in unless things are clearly flaming out of control.

Should we talk about god on hear? Not everyone believes in god. Doesn’t that cause arguments? I thought politics and religion were off limits on here? If they aren’t off limits, they should be.

Yes worried that was me that said it because all those topics were UPLIFTING!!! They were made to make the caregiver feel better and take their mind off caregiving in a positive way. I don’t mind the other topics at all. I just think talking about politics and trump haters and trump supporters should not be on aging care because politics is NOT uplifting!!! That was my point. Who agrees on politics,? Who agrees on trump? Nobody. It’s just arguments? Do you like trump worried? Are you republican or Democrat?

This is just my opinion, but people on here treat this site more like FB, and feel free to criticize, express hate, and attack other caregivers personally.

I have observed a group of posters who travel the site as a group, mean girls showing up to attempt to take down others, ruin their reputations, post behind people's backs what is untrue and negative opinions. They are bullies, imo.

This past week, I thought, with just a little more effort, one negative poster will be allowed to destroy the entire website single handedly. And this group has misinterpreted and ill-defined what the aging care website is intended for.

But I still believe that the Admins and moderators will edit, delete, and close negative threads for further comment to preserve the integrity of the Aging Care reputation.

We are not here to express hate for our aged parents, or hate towards other caregivers. People who design entire threads to express hate, and are joined in by the group I am referring to, just have not been brought up correctly, or at all.

I am not referring to those loyal caregivers who have experienced burnout and needed our help to recover burnout.

And I do not hate others who disagree with me.

The terms of use do state no religion or politics - or at least they used to.

Huh, I stand corrected. The new policies do politely ask that we limit comments to elder care but the rest is basically a huge CYA document.

Now we have political threads on here too. I was told don’t read them if I didn’t like them.

Agreed the questions, answers, and discussions have changed. There seems to be a lot more off topic discussion.

A lot of the questions have nothing to do with caregiving. What’s for dinner?? 3 good things today? But it takes our mind off the caregiving and it is meant to help lift our spirits and put us in a good mood. It works for me. A lot of the caregiving questions aren’t uplifting. What movie have you seen lately? Is a great question for people to get out of the house and enjoy a movie instead of being a caregiver 24/7. We need reminders to take care of ourselves. What better place to be reminded of that then here?

I think we've always had posts that are off topic. One difference I've noticed that some people are responding to them rather than ignoring them or telling the OP look elsewhere.
And we seem to be getting a lot more people who are dealing with family dysfunction rather than seeking advice about practical care.

I agree with Barb. Something has changed, there seem to be more people on the site recently that are lost and don't read what this site is.

Hey, Abby; I think we're just drawing a wider audience. Probably something to do with internet algorithms.

How is it going with mom and dad?