Hi you've been so helpful, I'm back for more advice. Mom has CHF with water restriction, sodium restriction, dementia, diabetes, afib & other diagnosis but the CHF & dementia are the two primarily at odds. My siblings have gotten wind that I'm getting a reverse mortgage(by the way still having issues w/POA & trust), to pay for care.They are of the mind mom doesn't need help. She seems physically able to manage but mentally cannot restrict her fluids, weigh & BP before food & water in the morning, or schedule her own medications & take them. I know as POA both medical & financial & successor trustee, I don't need their approval. Guess I'm looking for magic words to convey the need to self centered adults. My brother is coming this Saturday thru Monday to "give me a break". I know he's coming to assess the situation. Besides the fact my mother will be fawning all over him & insisting on cooking for him, I'm also worried he won't follow the water restriction even though he says he will. He says he will cook, weigh her, take her vitals & give her meds. I foresee her being very well. She won't be able to follow through on her meds & schedule on her own but the rest she can fake. Especially if he wants to see that she's fine. Other brothers will also be coming over to BBQ, have some beer, that's what one told me. Told him remember mom can't eat salt or drink beer. He said then we'll go out. Told him mom can't be left alone & he said "she'll be fine for a bit". That's not the one that's coming to care for her. Mom can move around the house w/Walker but if she sits on couch 8/10 times can't pull herself up & she can't remember not to sit on the couch. Mostly forgets Walker & I have to grab it for her when she's standing in the middle of the room wobbly with nothing to hold onto. I guess I would rather they would agree with me than be at odds for the next years. It's the inheritance they're concerned about. The home is her only asset. Any magic words? Actions?