coccoa Asked January 2017
How to get POA over my mother (93) that has dementia/Alzheimer's?
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I have been caring for her for a year next month. She can't pay her house bills/medical bills ect.. So I have been doing so with her checking account. I can't afford to pay for an attorney to do this. I have asked the NP that comes and checks on my mother for help in this matter but have gotten no where. Anyone have any suggestions as what I can do next. I want to do the right thing and this has been weighing on me for some time. HELP! Thank you.
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Mom's dementia, well often an elder is able to "show-dog" well enough to sign off on a DPOA, MPOA and any other legal needed. If there's banking involved, like she wants to place you as a signature on the account or change it to be POD (pay on death) to you, the bank officer will want to speak with mom on her own (like in an office with you seated outside) and she can show-dog a good hour and it can work. So you do need to pause and think IF mom can likely look competent and cognitive long enough to take a meeting, ask & answer questions. You can help in this by having her all nice & groomed and running through things over & over & over again. But if she's really not competent, then you are unfortunately going to have to go the guardianship route.
Guardianship is pretty involved, $$ to do and there is required court reporting. You can google your states name and guardianship to get an idea of what's what.
If you don't mind me asking, are you interdependent on your mom's income to make ends meet? Like it's mom's SS & retirement that is keeping house afloat as you are not working but instead doing caregiving full time for her for free?