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My dad's doctor's office has made him several appointments but he has cancelled them all. He wanted to get his life insurance in place before they told him its cancer. Because then he would have to put that down on life insurance. Is what he tells me. So I bust my butt getting things set up last year with life insurance. Well its not enough $$ now for life insurance. I've talked to my dermatologist told me to get him in right away. My dad is very stubborn. He is a paraplegic. I've tried to say lets get it done - maybe its not cancer but until you go we won't know. I'll go with you. He doesn't want me to have to take work off. He has his aides put egg shell stuff and band aides over it every day. We live a couple hours away from each other. I went down this weekend to help do paperwork in his office. My dad doesn't' like anyone to tell him what to do.

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Thanks for answering. I've tried a few pleading sessions and come on we can go together - what are we going to do without you. But at the end of the day i can only do so much. He is sound of mind. I've thought about calling his case worker - but my dad would rather die then be told what to do. the egg shell stuff is the home remedy for some things but not skin cancer. Now he wants to blame the issue with his nose on other things. I try to enjoy the time i have with him. Help him get paperwork in order and pray.
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in the end, you can't force him to go to the dermatologist. If he won't go, then he won't go. If I was fairly certain he was of sound mind, I'd, sadly, let it go -- and tell him you are doing so.

"I love you, dad. I've PRAYED that you would go to the dermatologist, but it hadn't done any good. I think you're foolish. But I have to let it go. If you ever change your mind, let me know, and I'll help you."
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He might be in denial. Cancer has over the years become such a threatening illness that it's hard not to become so fearful that one sometimes doesn't want to know and have to address the equally challenging and fearful treatments.

It does sound as well as if he's pretty set in his ways and the stubbornness complicates the situation.

Sometimes you have to meet stubbornness with your own adamant position and tell him either he goes to see a dermatologist or you're not going to care for him. This isn't a suggestion I make lightly as I don't like threatening but I had to do it once and it was fortunate I did because it turned out there was an internal hemorrhaging from interaction of a potent antibiotic with Warfarin.

It was fortunate that surgery wasn't necessary and the condition resolved in a few days, but it was definitely a scare. I don't get as much resistance any more!

What is the "egg shell stuff" that your father is using on the mass? It sounds like some snake oil remedy.
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