General caregiving hack: what is the ONE hack/shortcut you have found that has been a game changer... or as near to it as you've found?

I'm still in the 'at a distance' stage as the person I'm helping lives alone and manages fairly well. To monitor things without being intrusive, I use a SmartThings hub in their house with motion sensors -- I can tell if they're up and about, and I get an alarm if there is no activity for too long. In addition, they wear a Fitbit, and I can log in and see their heart rate and number of steps.

KaiulaniK which company are you using for meals? We have some of the PlantPure entree types at the local grocery store, and I would totally have crates full of those shipped in if necessary -- whole food, no added oil, and delicious.

Rather than pre-packaged meals, I purchased an Instant Pot, the large, 8qt version. I can control what goes into the food for my husband who is on a cardiac, low-salt meal plan. I make enough different meals to freeze and we eat well for a week. Cooking in the Instant Pot is very quick and I can usually make all my meals in a few hours.

I was a senior helping my very senior parents [90's] and grocery shopping was exhausting. I was still working full time, and doing volunteer work.

Just didn't want to take a whole Sunday being in grocery stores... yes, plural, because Mom would read the grocery ads and this store had a sale on can soup, another store a sale on bread, another on cereal. Target had the best price on cookies, etc. Mom was just use to doing that with my Dad once he had retired decades ago... it kept them busy.

Along came on-line grocery shopping. YES !! I set up an account for my parents, and a separate account for me. I could shop in my pj's. I could shop at midnight.

I had a choice of curb-side pick-up at the grocery store, or home delivery.

Of course, my Mom could claim the "food taste funny" even though it was the same identical product she would buy in the brick & mortar store. And heaven forbid if a brand name changed their packaging.... [rolling eyes].

When it came to meals..
I made a lot of soup and or stew. Easy to portion into 2 cup serving sizes in the little Ball Jars and put in the freezer. Easily thawed in the microwave. (When it was necessary I would puree prior to freezing)
Because it was soups and stews I shopped a lot of the close out produce, little bruises don't show up in a soup! so meals were pretty inexpensive done that way.

This sounds real strange but it worked.
When he started using tab briefs rather than the pull up type i would have him stand by the sink after toileting and put the brief on "backwards" so I was using his body to get the tabs fastened as tight as I could. Then another oddity..In the morning after his shower when dressing him I would put a pair of regular boxer brief on him OVER the tab brief. This held it in place better and he was less likely to have the tabs pop open. (It did help that the tabs were in the back though.)

Another strange thing I discovered.
When he sat on the toilet the barrier cream I used would sort of make him stick to the seat. I replaced the oblong toilet seat with one of the U shaped ones. I then placed a Tube sock on each side. He would sit down,. the sock would prevent the sticking and I could pull off the sock when he was done and wash it, I no longer had to scrub waterproof cream off the toilet seat.!

Pool noodles made great bumpers at the edge of the table so he would not bump his knees into the table if I pushed him in too close. The also padded the back bar on the wheelchair so it was not as hard. They also added padding on the arm and edge of the wheelchair so when he started leaning to one side I could prop him easily.

I am pretty much the crock pot queen and always make a ton and freeze. Fortunately I love things like Buffalo Hot Wing Chicken Pasta sauce and spaghetti and tons of beans, so I eat very inexpensively. So much depends on the food you enjoy.

Also BOOST, for you. Cold. Chocolate is great.

A lot of seniors might enjoy having an Amazon Alexa device for music, turning lights on/off, ask questions, get news, etc. Note: It does not call 911.

What an interesting topic...and helpful responses. Such a terrific community.

Please share online food company info.

My grocery stores have a salad and hot entree bar. The meals change daily. If I don't like what I see at one, I go to the other one(s).

My saving grace is my husband; he assists with taking my 93 and 94 yr old parents to appointments and insists we get away from time to time.
Also, making plans with a good home care agency for back up support in case one of them is hospitalized while we are away.
Having on line accounts for their medical providers so I can get test results, appointments, communicate with docs without having to be on the phone forever.

When I started having to manage Mom’s meals, snacks, etc., I adopted the same strategies I used when raising 3 active boys while I worked FT. I created a monthly meal plan & a list of easy snacks for Mom’s night-time grazing. From that was a master list of ingredients & snacks. I would have everything delivered once a month. Then I would put snacks into snack-size baggies or containers & we would stick to the meal plan without fail.

Ditto for laundry — certain items on certain days, with hampers for each type of item. If I cleaned our house, I would have followed the same approach; however, I had someone do that every other week.

I buy the big Stouffer and Marie Calendar frozen dinners for my Step Dad at Walmart. Stouffers Chicken,Rice and Vegetable dinner; Cheesy Chicken and Rice; Chicken Parmesan. Marie Calendars Meatloaf and Potatoes.

I am only caregiver for my bed-ridden mom who has a feeding tube and vascular dementia.

My Step Dad has Alzheimers Stage 4. I mow lawn. I made it simple for myself. I am getting things organized in each room again. I dont stress over things that have to get done. No family members come over to help. I had bad help in the past with housekeeping and caregiving. Had my own business. I have to take care of them. Not going on Medicaid. Would just be bad care all over again. Property is involved and not giving up the house. I do errands once a week. They have social security and pension. I have gotten much stronger going through this. Learning a lot. I have Visiting Physicians Association come to the house once a month for mom. I also have a pharmacy that delivers for free and is 5 minutes from my house. I have a beautician that comes to the house to cut hair. I go to Walgreens, Walnart and Jewel. And sometimes WholeFood and Tradef Joe's. I use to workout caregiving gives you a good workout. I drink protein powder.
I give my Step Dad Max Protein and Enlive to drink. He can still walk and do things for himself.
I do laundry everyday. Housekeeping not done as much.
I keep it as simple as possible now. I am going to sleep at midnight and getting up by 8:30am. I don't stress about anything any more.

two saving graces: Walmart and amazon
i know there are other places where you can order things but I like these two. I start an online order with Walmart and add to it as I see things I need. When I have an order ready I complete it pick a day and time to go get it. They also deliver for a nominal fee. Amazon is great and stand by all there items. I order quite a lot and return some. Just drop it at UPS. I am a 24/7 caregiver but can get to Walmart or ups and be back in 15 min.
Not-sure what I would do without these services
also I finally took my husband to Council on Agings retreat (adult day care center) He enjoyed the socializing and I was able to have a few hours to myself. He is actually looking forward to going again. I never thought this would work but it has thank God

Addendum to my previous message: I also cook a lot of frozen carrots, when the Stouffers Chien, Rice and Vegetable is baking in the oven. When all is done, I put about half the dinner in a big bowl with some carrots. I add some warm to hot water to the food in the bowl. Then serve with a slice of bread with crust off. And apple juice with some Miralax.
I take the leftovers and put them together in a big container and add water. Now I have enough for 2 more meals. Just have to heat it up. We have no microwave.
This food is soft and easy to chew too, for Step Dad.

My stepdad had swallowing issues, so we had to puree most things. Found a machine called a Baby Brezza that steams on a timer, then purees. It was handy because if I forgot it for a few minutes because of some other "adventure," food didn't get burned on the stove. Also, I could prepare batches, freeze them in silicon "ice cube" trays (2 ounce, cute little round "cubes"--brand is Baby Bliss, but other brands are out there too), pop those out and put them in a freezer bag labelled with description and date, and just drop one or two in a custard cup, microwave a couple of minutes as needed. We also found that Hormel makes already pureed entrees that store on the pantry shelf (not freezer) and microwave in one minute. Most were not too salty. Ordered these online from a place called Healthy Kin, I think. Easy little cups such as custard cups, and/or a plate with compartments made it easier for him to eat (blind) without trying to chase mush around on the plate. The goal was to have prep-intensive food available without it being obvious that it was prep intensive, so we could have a family meal and have him not be embarrassed by a bunch of scurrying around and noisy blenders (an "ouch" for him and Mom, with hearing aids) all the time), yet have safe swallowing. A little, quick food chopper was handy for salad.

My hack is realizing I was in over my head and stopping. I’ve been disabled since 1988. When my stepfather started with Alzheimer’s I was still not housebound so took them to dr appointments etc once my mother found it overwhelming to drive and watch him alone ( she refused to get any outside help). Once he passed away the caregiving for him rapidly caught up with her and her dementia skyrocketed as well as infections , a fib etc so I started taking her meals as well as appointments etc. She finally relented and got a housekeeper a couple times a month but after about a year I was 75% housebound. When the siblings refused to do much to help( token visits ) and threw a fit when my daughters helped her( and thereby me) , I said no more. So much easier knowing my limits

Great life hack ideas above. Thanks for sharing.
Right before I moved my mother into Assisted Living apartment, I did two simple things that still helps her 3 years later. 1) I noticed that lots of apartments had things on the door. I found on Etsy a very large, bright pink, beautiful burlap sunflower wreath. She loved it, but more importantly, she uses it to help her find her way back from activities. She sees that bright pink and feels relief. 2) I had individual vinyl stickers made (Etsy) and placed them on outside of all the kitchen, bathroom, bedroom drawers. Towels, wash rags, silverware, panties, pajamas, socks, etc... Such a simple thing that helps her so much.

Mjlarkan, the door wreaths you mention are a reminder how much my Mom enjoyed not only hers, but viewing all the ones she would pass by in the hallways of her facility. Many family members would change them seasonally, which was enjoyed by other residents and staff as well. It's a great gift idea, too, for elders who have become hard to shop for.

Amazon & Typewritten Lists in order if priority + wall calendar. One list is just for me, which we call "Private Benjamin," One is for groceries and the other is for household handyman type chores. (NOTE: Dad and I agreed that health comes 1st, Then personal priorities or appointments for us are the dogs, Then the house and a wishlist.) If he brings up something low on the priority list I give him an either or choice. Do you want the total it repaired or do you want him to paint the front of the house entryway?)

When they are completed we cross them off, and dad makes his comments in the corner margin.

It's a great help.

Thanks for sharing details of your amazing life hack! I work online and cook as much as before because I enjoy it, but housecleaning was rarely enjoyable. I still do laundry and to answer your question, I have changed my standards re housecleaning: if the house is free of vermin, there are no tripping hazards, and spills get cleaned promptly, then it's enough. Gone are the days of Comet cleanser, washing walls, spritzing light switches, mopping, vacuuming, and so forth.

Since so much time is taken up with my mom (laundry, bills, errands, etc) I’ve hired someone to come & do my vacuuming & cleaning the bathrooms for me. I try not to worry about a bit more dust & as long as we’re fed & kitchen is tidy I’m ok. I used to be a “clean freak” but had to learn I just can’t do everything anymore.

Ordering groceries online to be delivered to my home.

My hack was a simple one - ask for help with my mother (occasionally) as I had to live with her out of state to provide care for her for an extended period, knowing that if I didn't ask these people to give her the very rare occasional ride to the doctor's or dentist, that I would most surely crash and burn.

These are the thing which have helped me. Mom lives in an apt on my property at 83. Not willing to drive but still fairly mobile except for going out in heat, heart and blood pressure problems, fairly home bound. I have a full time job, some business travel and hubby travels rarely. No outside help from siblings.
1) housekeeper in her home bi-weekly
2) grocery delivery for her favorite and fresh items
3) Nutrasystem - brother suggested it and she likes it.
4) I take a staycation somewhere locally when I can

Before my MIL moved in with us, she used a traditional pharmacy for the multiple prescriptions she needed. Mostly, we would stop by the pharmacy after a doctor's appointment so I could run in and get what she needed. Once or twice a month, she would mess up and I would get The Call. I would have to stop what I was doing to run to the pharmacy, get her meds and take them to her because her life saving medicine ran out that afternoon/the next day. Arghh...

When we were talking about her living with us, I told her I would not be driving to her pharmacy for her since it is 20 miles from the new house. She argued that the pharmacist knows her and her needs but I held firm that I wasn't driving past three other pharmacies to get to the one she used for years.

Luckily, we have a pharmacy in the area with a delivery service that accepted her insurance. She was reluctant to change but found that having her prescriptions delivered was a Godsend. She also enjoyed the company of the person who dropped off the meds even if it was only for a few minutes.

I am a long distance caregiver for my dad who’s in memory care. Back when he was still driving, he could handle the car fine, good eyesight, no dings etc but was having short term memory problems. I found a GPS tracking device on line that simply plugged in under the dash of the car. I could follow his every move, speed, travel history and real time movements. Dad wasn’t aware of the device. He would have thrown a fit. I tracked him every day for about 4 years and I could see him starting to wander and forget where he was going.

I finally had to disable the car and use the YOUR CAR WAS TOWED TO BE FIXED ruse. Dad followed mom into assisted living a few days later.

I put a nice looking wood handrail that runs along the wall near the bed. This is how I get her dressed - she knows the routine, to grab the bar and stand up for underwear change, and it also helps her to get to her portable toilet. Also have a baby monitor which is sometimes helpful and sometimes not - depends on whether she will call out for help or not. I put a door alert just in cause one of the them makes it outside at night. I've started using Instacart and have been using Walmart and Amazon, also some of the online vitamin stores have food at good prices and will send it through UPS. A wipe off calendar - I keep two on door for this month and next month. Otherwise would never keep up with appointments. I fixed a small pantry where I keep extra pudding snacks, crackers, juice, paper towels etc. I hate having to make a last minute trip when I run out. We have had a chest freezer for a long time, and I have a cousin who runs wedding event catering and she said make large batch of casseroles, then freeze smaller portions, and I also keep extra bread in the freezer. I have a one month medicine system. It has small boxes for each day of the month. I would rather take 30 minutes to fill it than to have to fill a small box every week. Also any care worker can easily see what pills need to be taken. I laminated a small card with medicines and health problems - doctor was impressed! So much better than having to go over and over the list with several health people - just hand it to them.

Using Pillpack (pre-packaged medications which also includes any vitamins or nonprescription meds) instead of having to fill pill boxes. Saves me at least two hours every two weeks.

Boredom and loneliness are real. I forgot another super valuable tool. If your LO has vision problems, difficulty processing the printed word, or even physical trouble holding a book, turning pages, etc., the Library of Congress can loan a talking book machine until the machine is no longer needed. The machine is sturdy, sound is very clear, the buttons are big and even announce what they do. The machine runs on a long lasting battery and recharges quickly. Your LO can be sent audio books/magazines of interest free of charge through the mail. But perhaps best of all, there is a website you can go to and download audio books, and the website describes the book and tells you how many minutes/hours it is, so you can find itemd that can work with your LO's interests, cognitive ability, or attention span. This helped us while away many hours with my stepdad, and sometimes the story would trigger some interesting conversation or memories.