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Since this isn't driving her to a dr. appt. or physical therapy (something medical), I'm afraid to use it for this. Three months ago, we had to put Dad in a nursing home (Lewy Body Dementia) and start the whole Medicaid spend-down process. Our 1st lawyer we visited with had done NOTHING in 2 1/2 months, so the day Mom was discharged from the hospital from having her knee replaced and I checked her into the nursing home for physical rehab, my brother talked with another lawyer. She had about 10 days to work with and has been amazing with the advise she's given us. Last week, Mom was released from her physical rehab and is at home. She's doing good, but she can't drive yet. I've been approved for FMLA to care for her because of her knee, and we're taking turns with her daily care so no one's stuck doing it all (working good). Now, back to the Medicaid spend-down; they assigned a life insurance policy to a funeral home in lieu of cashing it out at 2/3 value and then loosing 1/2 of it towards Dad's spend-down. We thought that Mom would be able to go down in the future and make their arrangements, but the life insurance company wants the details ASAP. The funeral home is 90 miles one way away from Mom's house and this will end up being an all-day endeavor. Is this an FMLA eligible reason to take it? I work for a major cell phone provider that is like working with Satan (even though I'm a good employee that's been there several years, have taken a whopping 32 hours of FMLA over my entire employment time, and that's never been on discipline for anything and play by the rules). If this is something I shouldn't do, they WILL hire someone to follow me and see what I'm doing and where I go, and possibly discipline me, up to and including termination for benefit fraud. Any advise?

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Call your HR department and get it in writing. Have the lawyer get the funeral home, insurance company and mom on a conference call. No, mom can't be there, she just had surgery. Lesson to be learned for the future--just because someone else wants you to do it doesn't mean it has to be done. What if there was no "you?"
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Angie61, word to the wise, don't use all your FMLA on your mother's care. Use up your vacation days, your sick days, and days unpaid first because you never know when a serious illness will hit you yourself without warning and you need all those FMLA days.

All FMLA does is make sure you still have a job when you return to work. Some companies have insurance on their employees, such as Aflac, where the company can pay you a small salary while you are out on FMLA.
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My paperwork for FMLA for dad says "for his care", and other things.. I am covered if the GC can;t come (handy in the snowy winter), or if I need to stay home because the power goes out and I need make sure the generator keeps running.. as well as Dr apts. And my work does not and CAN NOT ask what I am doing for him unless there is a "pattern" of abuse. If you need to cover your butt, have the Funeral /insurance people give you a note that it was for care related issues (future care?) If it is needed for the nursing home, it should be OK. So if you have to call out.. just say FMLA. End of discussion. I do agree to save some for yourself, but OMG 32 hours in several years is nothing, so you are doing good there.., those 12 weeks don't roll over!
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