Find out when Father's doctor appointments are.

Have you spoken to or written to the social workers at the V A where he recieves his medical care?

How does he remember his appointments? Does he go alone or does someone accompany him?

He will not let his neighbor go with him (he use to go with him sometimes). VA sends a card to tell him when his appts are and he either misses them or goes to them depending on if he finds the cards on the table. I have a calendar up for him that he writes he weight on ever day. I asked him to put his appt on there when he gets the cards. I have asked Richard if he sees a card on the table to write it on his calendar but Dad goes through his mail himself and does not want help. I wanted him to move closer to us but he does not want to do that either...!

Frog, most of us here have been in this situation. If you can't make any headway with the VA social workers, here are some things to do.

1. Call the Area Agency on Aging in dad's county. Tell them about his situation and ask for a needs assessment. They might also bbe able to make some headway with VA where you can't.

2. Make sure that dad's neighbors have your cell phone number and know that you want to be called if they notice a decline, dangerous things, etc.

3. Will your dad assign you as his PoA? Does he have an advance directive, will or trust set up?

4. If you can, plan a trip to go se him so that you can asess what the state of his living situ9is.

5. And most difficult, wait. Something will happen. A fall, a sudden decline. You might start researching ALs and Nursing Homes, both in his area and close to you.

This is really hard.(((((( Hugs))))))

I have tried to reach a Social worker with VA Reno, they never call back. I will try to find the Area Agency on Aging and see if they can help. The neighbors all have my home, cell and work #'s and they know to call if they see anything I need to know. He does have an advance directive am his PoA. I want to go see him, but am trying to coordinate my trip with a Drs appt so I don't just miss it one way or the other. Thought it might help to see his Cardiologist since a lot of what is going on his Cardiac related (and I work in the Cardiac field). I know the have been researching AL's and NH in Carson City (close to where he lives) and I know most of the places around here. It will just depend on where there have room for him when the time comes. A home for Mom is where got a lot of info when we needed to place my 2 Aunt's. They are great to work with and know just were the beds and prices are too!! Helps so much!
Thank you so much for your input and understanding...!!!

You might also send a cerified letter to the va facility. Cc dad's lawyer. Might get some movement.