Father declining rapidly. Do I try to find him nursing home or call hospice?

There is a resurgence of doctors who will visit patients in their own homes...perhaps in yours? I would start there if it's available to you. Schedule a physical. And be available to talk with the doctor, as many elderly people will unfortunately tell the doctor whatever they think will allow them to stay in their home, whether or not it's the safest thing for them to do.

How available are you and/or other family members to help your dad when he needs it? Hospice care in the home provides visits from a nurse to assess, address symptoms and monitor medications. They are approximately hour visits 1-4 times a week, depending on how the patient is doing. A home health aide may visit 1-3 times a week to provide assistance with bathing. But that's all that is provided. If your dad needs more care/supervision in the home, you will have to locate it and pay for it. If you have inpatient hospice facilities in your area, they may provide more services. I how hope this answers some if your questions.

cjbailey, sometimes we need to fib to our elders to get them to do something that is important, like see a doctor. Some have found that telling their parent that if they don't go to see their doctor at least twice a year, then they will lose their health insurance. Usually that will get the parent's attention, as they wouldn't want to have to pay out of pocket if they are in the hospital. It's worth a try.

Now, if you can get Dad to a doctor, have Dad checked for an urinary tract infection which can cause an elder to decline quickly among other things. Not long ago my Dad had a fall and was taken to the ER, turned out he had a UTI, plus was dehydrated.

You can call Hospice and they will evaluate him, but I am guessing he will toss them out and say he is fine. He has the right to refuse Hospice.