Financial assistance Mom (78) at home. Can't get in and out of house. Advice?

Call Habitat for Humanity. They may have a waiting list but they might also be able to make an exception and install a ramp quickly while you're waiting for resolution on the hospice issue.

Thank you for your quick response. Today was a bit of a rough day and things got real very quickly. Having to stop by the local fire department and ask them for help getting her in the house was not fun. I must say those guys are the greatest. They managed to get her into the house and checked her vitals before they left. They stayed a few minutes to make sure that she was OK. Cant thank them enough. I had talked with Hospice last week. Being it is a holiday weekend, getting a doctors order for Hospice is going to be tough but we will survive till then. If I can get them involved without her having to come off dialysis that is going to be great. In order for this to happen they need to have other serious health issues besides ESRD which I don't think would be a problem. Its just getting doctors to agree to it. Sometimes they are very helpful and sometimes they really don't have a clue. I have lived with this woman for 5 years and known her for 50, she after all is my mother. I know her pretty well. But some doc's don't see her the way I see her. I had to prove that to the doctors when she was in the hospital a few months ago. I wanted her checked for dementia and the said that she "looked fine to them". Said she was Alert, knew her surroundings, didn't seem to be off in any way. I told the doctor to just PLEASE have her evaluated. He agreed after me arguing for 30 minutes. When he walked in the room and said he wanted to have her further evaluated because of all the meds she was on she HIT THE ROOF. Suddenly this nice little old lady they thought was in there turned violent. The doc said he couldn't believe it. Lucky for me he was the one she was upset with. This is all happening so suddenly its unreal. Sad thing is last summer we actually gave away many of the things she is in need of today. And gave them to charity. I don't know what I am doing wrong, but I have given to charity my entire life and it really upsets me that now we need a little help and there isn't one person out there offering a hand of any type (including my siblings, they don't believe she is that sick, yet they don't come around but once a year either and live less than an hour from here). I have tried talking to the Social Worker at the Dialysis Clinic where she goes, I thought that was her job was to help patients. She just sits and tells me about how things go when she visits her mom, "same thing your mom does" I don't care what her mom does, I care about my mother. I'm sorry, she is there to do a job and I am not sure what/if she even does. If she is a social worker, she is a poor one. As far a me loosing my SSDI, honestly for the time she has left, If they didn't cut me off right now it would be OK. I suffer from heart problems, need another hip replacement (makes 5) and am needing gallbladder surgery also. So I don't think getting it started back up would be too much of an issue. Right now I am just trying to take care of her in her final days as best I can with what I have and it isn't enough. I can't have any surgery or serious medical care myself right now because there would be no one to take care of her. This may sound awful but I told mom the reason we can't get help is that we don't look and act the part. I was a professional when I retired, Suit and Tie all the time, and she was always well maintained. She does have Tricare , Medicare and Medicaid. I I just don't have time for red tape right now. The lady at Hospice gave me a lot of hope if we can get her in under the right diagnoses. Still have the issue of getting her in and out of the house. They don't help with that, but maybe they have some type services that can. The lady at Hospice said they could have what ever DME she needed in 48 hours or less and in many times same day, which would include a wheel chair. Still gotta have that ramp. I cant get her up those stairs myself. Anyway, thanks again for your information. Looks like I have a busy week ahead of me. You know, we all know we are going to die but when you are in the situation she is in, she really knows that each day/moment could very well be her last. I can only imagine what she is going through. I just want to help her as much as I can and it's tough. Have a safe and Happy Memorial Day

Consider signing her up for Hospice, because dialysis is no picnic and many patients opt out after a few treatments. Medicare should cover the rental of a wheelchair, so get her MD to order one for her. If you get paid to be her caregiver, you are no longer disabled and your disability check will screech to a halt. If you apply to get a waiver and list yourself as caregiver BINGO! all your SSDI will stop cold. Assisted Living would be a good option for her. If she was married to a wartime veteran, she could get up to $1113 a month from the VA. That plus her SS check might be enough to cover the cost of Assisted Living. A good facility will help find aid for her.