I have this feeling of sadness in the pit of my stomach. I know it is okay to feel it. My mother is a rattled shell of herself and my brothers are busy with their own lives. It is just my mother and me, so it feels like I am living in a world of nothingness. I have three Christmas gifts I still need to buy, cookies and candies to make, and a meal to prepare. I know I will get it done. I don't feel stress or excitement -- just the sadness. I plan to go out this afternoon, hoping it will pick me up some. I'm afraid I'll just radiate the sadness around me. It's not clinical depression. I've been through that before. It is just a sadness that feels like tears are about to come.