So my mom is at a senior assisting living . As of late Ive been getting harassed by the staff there not the care givers . I'm very friendly to all the residents and care givers when I visit my mom . The people in charge called me into the office saying I can't be conversating with the care givers anymore that I could get them fired if I distract them not only that I normally leave at 8pm when visiting hrs are done sometimes a few mins after that since I help my mom into bed since she doesn't trust anyone to help her there . They told me if they see me past 8pm that they'll ban me from visiting my mom and that they'll call the cops on me for trespassing at that time . I don't know what too do anymore it's always something I respect there rules I don't cause trouble everyone there knows me and thinks I'm a good person for visiting my mother everyday . So what can I do if I keep getting harassed by the supervisors ?
Going there everyday and staying all day is too much, your mother needs to acclimate herself to her new home and structure. You are impeding that process.
They are not harassing you, back off visit a few times a week for a couple of hours, let the staff put her to bed, she doesn't trust anyone because you won't let the staff do their jobs and are interfering with their day to day process by talking to them too much.
Get your life back, the clock is ticking, find something else to do with your time, this has become a habit.
You are a good person and love your mother, it might be time to become her daughter again, not her caregiver.
They have given you the visiting hours. Obey they. You can have friendly brief conversations with caregivers, but they are there to do their job and cannot afford the distraction of long conversations. They are not there to chat, but to do their job, which is caring for elders, not chatting with visitors.
If someone has told you that you would be "removed by police" then apparently this is something that has been on ongoing problem you are not fully comprehending, because no facility would call someone into the admins and threaten them with the police. There is something left unsaid here, in my humble opinion.
I wish you good luck.
Part of moving an elder loved one into managed care is to let go. Your mom must learn that she can trust, and you must learn it too. It is heartening to see and hear the camaraderie between staff members and elderly relatives as they get to know each other. They might have nicknames for each other, or little jokes. My husband in memory care can no longer talk understandably, but when he sees his morning aide across the dining room he smiles and gives her a thumbs up or okay sign. She responds with her nickname for him or a thumbs up of her own. This tells me that he's comfortable and happy there.
Back off and let mom build her new group of friends and companions in whatever way she will. That place is not your social hour! Find friends and spend time with them doing fun things or lunch at home or whatever you like. Things will improve overall if you do.
Please don’t take it too personally. They’ve given you a heads up. Now let them do their job (which they are paid to do and your mom is paying them to do).
You need to find other things to
occupy your time . See friends , make new friends etc . outside of this facility .
Perhaps see a therapist regarding this unhealthy attachment .
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