My mother (in her late 70's) fell again tonight after several times of falling and hurting herself. She is kind of lethargic.The nice fireman was kind and also concerned about her falling down again and breaking something or worse and it is not funny at all. My dad is also almost in his late 80's and also pretty sick (with diarrhea) and looses his balance sometimes.
I am kind of scared something will happen while I am here by myself and don't have very many people that I could call or depend on in case of an emergency and it is pretty damn sad. Sometimes I don't know whether to pull my hair out or cry my eyes out.
The school I just graduated from kept criticizing my resume and am having a hard time finding work. Maybe there is a reason for that. I am trying not to turn into a basket case or lose my cool. Other people do not understand. It's just not easy sometimes.
I know this is a hard choice. I had to do this after several years of caring for my parents. There just comes a point when their health has declined to a point that you simply can't physically and emotionally do it anymore. It doesn't mean you've failed them or yourself. It only means you have given all you have to give and you need help.
I hope this helps and wish you and your parents all the best.
You also need to consider your health. You say you are now on medication to help you cope and you now have high blood pressure. What happens to your parents if you have a major medical emergency and have to be hospitalized? You have no reason to feel guilty. You have given them every moment of your life for the past two years. You have let your own health decline which is not a good sign. You need to sit down with your parents and have a heart to heart talk and tell them exactly how you feel. Try to talk them into at least looking at Assisted Living Facilities in your area. With my parents they realized after looking at them that they weren't the hell holes they had been lived to believe.
What ever you do you have got to find some relief. If there are no other family members, then talk to your church, or social service agencies in your area. Please find some help and do it soon. For your sake as well as that of your parents.
All my Best
It's heartbreaking to watch our parents unravel and also realize we're falling apart alongside them. Something's gotta give, and our natural instinct to survive kicks in. Me or them? What should I do?
If you put them in AL or a NH together, at least they'll have each other. But that's not an easy decision to make, even if they say it's okay. The guilt, the depression will still me there even after they're gone.
Life goes on with or without you sis. Doesn't matter if you're alone or with someone to commiserate with. ... At least you still have us.
Now, about that resume:
Go with your strengths and focus primarily on what you've done the last 10 years. Make sure specialized trainings and skills are emphasized. If adept at caregiving, part-time Home Health Aide or something along those lines might help bring home some bacon and give you a different perspective on how care & provide for your parents without going on self-destruct mode.
If your school criticizes your resume, don't become defensive. Ask how to improve it instead. The purpose of a resume is to sell your talents/skills to the highest bidder. ... And you have skills girl. It's just a matter of packaging yourself in such a way people want to hire you.
During the interview, it is what it is. Dress for the part, be articulate but amiable, don't use million dollar words that aren't going to be worth a penny (it's a turnoff), and whatever you do don't look desperate. ... And above all, be a Lady.
So, this ends up being like a domino effect where we all end up getting sick. Finally made an appointment for Mom with her doctor tomorrow and good luck getting her there since she can barely walk. Then we get a nasty woman calling about my father's urology appointment. Now have to go to court about some bogus ticket that was already taken care of/dismissed.
So, this is just not a healthy situation at all. I have to tried to check with the local caregivers and the VA for any applical benefits since no income for me and have yet to receive any posititive feedback or help so far.
Gotta go get some R&R as I have an abcess on my forehead that is making me sick to my stomach ugh