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My mother has lived with my wife and I for 35 years. When we have a day off and things planned she with no notice want's us to take her some place, usually a doctor visit or shopping. The other day I was off and had things I needed to do and was looking forward to some time alone.With no notice she wanted me to take her for blood work and I got irritated now I feel guilty for telling her no. I am 60 years old and am getting older myself, I sometimes have had enough. Any advice.

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Thank you all for the fast responses. I am her only child so she has always needed me. I will work it out with her and ask for more notice.
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I don't mind taking her but I would like a day or two notice. Like I said this was out of the blue non emergency. By the way I consider myself a pro at taking care of Mom have been for 35 years. I just happened upon this site and thought I would ask what other people think.
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After being a caregiver or 35 years I think you deserve to do whatever you want! ;-)

Asking for some notice is not unreasonable, that way you can get her to where she needs to go and schedule some "me" time in there as well. I know what it feels like to be looking forward to some down time and then all of a sudden there's a task that pops up. Takes the wind right out of your sails.

Maybe on the weekend ask your mom if there is anything in the upcoming week that she needs to do then plan accordingly. But feel guilty? Nah.
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Guilt: the gift that keeps on giving!

If you don't take her who will?
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Well, That is inconsiderate of her. No you should not feel guilty especially if she did not give you notice. Part of us feeling guilty/annoyed is when we don't set boundaries. Is it possible for you or wife to set up appointments so they are good for you? Possible for someone else to take her?
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It is probably reasonable to ask her to give you advance notice if she needs to go somewhere. Unless she has dementia, then maybe not. What if you had not been off, what would have happened?

You do not need to feel guilty for telling her no. Working out transportation sometimes takes negotiation and rescheduling. Nothing wrong with that.
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We all agree, drop the guilt! Plan accordingly.
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