Is your father agreeable to changing doctors? Can he change doctors with his health plan? There are many things that cause feet to swell including congestive heart failure. He needs another doctor, a competent one.
Olindacat, July is too far away take Dad to the urgent care clinic at a reputable large hospital. The extreme weight loss and edema in his legs are signs of a serious illness. I can't tell you what but he needs tests, a diagnosis and treatment. Write down all you can remember including and drugs and OTC meds he is taking. Ensure is perfectly good as a supplement if dad will drink it. Boost tastes nicer but is not better
You will have to follow up on your Dad's doctor's care and recommendations. Sounds like your situation is one you can't avoid! You've got to get your Dad better healthcare providers or personal nursing service if possible. My mother's doctor was so defensive when I questioned him about why my mother was on diabetes medication when her blood work clearly showed no indication of high blood sugar levels. She peaked at this particular point, but even then the readings didn't warrant the expensive medication he put her on. He took her off of it after I gave him my interpretation of the blood work results. Based on my own research, it was completely obvious that he was not interested in my mother's health...only her insurance and how much he can drain from it! Hurry and get a new doctor! Do your own research to learn about what they are doing to your Dad! Object if you notice any discrepancies with the doctor's recommendations. My parents are old-school in that they believe that anything the doctor tells them is the truth. They didn't realize before now that the doctor and pharmaceuticals put people on medications that they don't need and they are typically not cheap! Sounds like your Dad is similar and I completely understand. They came from a generation and time where profit wasn't the primary motive in treating illness. Its the sad truth of our system now and illnesses aren't being treated...the symptoms are being treated and in doing so...more symptoms and side-affects are created. Too many of us are ignorant of this growing threat to our existence or just not concerned enough about to question it. We have to do our own leg work now, because we can no longer trust our systems to look out for our best interest.
I agree. Change doctors and, if i may say, it is so much easier to do all of this away from New York. So much waiting and so expensive. My mom was admitted to a senior behavioral clinic at almost at ONCE when it was determined that she needed it. I think she waited three days.
You might want to contact Geisinger Medical Center in Danville, PA. It is only a three hour drive from NYC (so is Ithica...) Award winning hospital. I brought my husband there for chest pains at 10:00 a.m. one fine day, and he was in his private room after having a stent placed in/near his heart by 3:00 p.m. Five hours after we arrived!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Check it out! http://www.geisinger.org/
Thank you for giving this your time. I tried my noise-cancelling Bose headphones, I tried ear plugs, I tried noise-cancelling ear buds, wireless headphones, and ambient music. I am still trying to find a solution, but what I think is is issue is his mind: he can't stop it and it is churning. I fear he may have some instinctive response to his decline and be in a kind of shock. He noticed it too when on Memorial weekend the construction let up and still was unable to sleep.
I have been pushing preteen on him and he is getting color in his face. The new mediation his doctor gave him, after I insisted he look at his legs, has really helped reduce the swelling. He is still slurring and complaining (less so today) of foamy sloth.
Thanks for the advice, Veronica91. He likes the Boost and is responding to it. Actually ate some pizza today. I can say he seems to be showing some signs of improvement, but is a long way from being what I guess you could say is 'better'.
Thanks for that article link and note, very helpful and I have circulated it to everyone (wife, sister, brother).
My sister (60) has been really MIA. She has plenty of time to go on cruises 3-4x a year, buy her retirement home, be on Facebook but she has not been involved in any substantive way. My brother (43) is just moving back into my father and his mother's apartment. He's self-consumed with trying to make a buck here in NYC, and I understand his plight, but has he chipped in any energy? No. My big bad has to do with my trashing his wife, who seems to have really stepped it up since I came home. I wrote this, yesterday, and she was all over it:
The subject line was: "Your room stinks!"
Dad:
FYI: the urine odor in your room is very strong and overwhelming. MamaC is so close to you I don’t think she smells it anymore….
I have offered a maid service, as well as to even be your maid myself, but you resist.
Now, someone has got to get in there and flush that room out with bleach or the bacteria and other grime is going to just add to your ailments and make you sicker.
You say you want to get better and then you sabotage the help. Please, I’m sorry if you don’t like hearing it but trust me, even a real lion’s den is hosed down everyday….
Stop being a piglet and either ask MamaC to clean it, Kareem, or (as your last option, please…) I will come and do it myself!
Love, John
I know this sounds harsh, but my father is a no BS kind of guy from Brooklyn. He'd rather hear a direct point being made than any syrupy talk. Sorry if any of what I am writing has offended....
Here was the result:
His wife wrote me this a few hours ago:
"Hi John, I found the culprit, there was residual urine spilling over to the bottom storage container beside JB's chair. I Will clean both the bottom and the top container on a DAILY BASIS from now on with a good disinfectant. Regarding the EXPENSIVE ANIMAL URINE CLEANER, I don't think that we'll need it at this time. Regarding the GLASS CONTAINERS for him to urinate in, I don't want to use any GLASS around JB because he BRUISES AND CUTS very easily and then it becomes a huge problem of coagulating his blood. I will have to continue purchasing the plastic containers ( which are lighter in weight) but will WASH AND DISCARD them more frequently. Thanks for the idea of a dish washer, but I don't wish I had a dish washer - running HOT WATER and patience works equally as well. We'll talk."
I'm not responding quickly enough, it seems.... Demensia huh? He seems so lucid but then he is showing very subtle signs of degraded effort mentally. My wife's mother has it, or Alzheimers (which I thought were interchangeable), and she went down fully and is now forgetting how to walk as she is in a wheelchair so much.
Judging from the other threads I am seeing on this site, I am about the zillionth person to be going through this. I figured as much, but was really looking for an outlet, as many here may be as well, not so much to vent but to expose the doctor. I know it sounds petty but how many are under his care? How many others are being neglected as he rings the register? I should just move on but find it hard to do so.
Write down all you can remember including and drugs and OTC meds he is taking.
Ensure is perfectly good as a supplement if dad will drink it. Boost tastes nicer but is not better
You might want to contact Geisinger Medical Center in Danville, PA. It is only a three hour drive from NYC (so is Ithica...) Award winning hospital. I brought my husband there for chest pains at 10:00 a.m. one fine day, and he was in his private room after having a stent placed in/near his heart by 3:00 p.m. Five hours after we arrived!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Check it out! http://www.geisinger.org/
Thank you for giving this your time. I tried my noise-cancelling Bose headphones, I tried ear plugs, I tried noise-cancelling ear buds, wireless headphones, and ambient music. I am still trying to find a solution, but what I think is is issue is his mind: he can't stop it and it is churning. I fear he may have some instinctive response to his decline and be in a kind of shock. He noticed it too when on Memorial weekend the construction let up and still was unable to sleep.
I have been pushing preteen on him and he is getting color in his face. The new mediation his doctor gave him, after I insisted he look at his legs, has really helped reduce the swelling. He is still slurring and complaining (less so today) of foamy sloth.
Thanks for that article link and note, very helpful and I have circulated it to everyone (wife, sister, brother).
My sister (60) has been really MIA. She has plenty of time to go on cruises 3-4x a year, buy her retirement home, be on Facebook but she has not been involved in any substantive way. My brother (43) is just moving back into my father and his mother's apartment. He's self-consumed with trying to make a buck here in NYC, and I understand his plight, but has he chipped in any energy? No. My big bad has to do with my trashing his wife, who seems to have really stepped it up since I came home. I wrote this, yesterday, and she was all over it:
The subject line was: "Your room stinks!"
Dad:
FYI: the urine odor in your room is very strong and overwhelming. MamaC is so close to you I don’t think she smells it anymore….
I have offered a maid service, as well as to even be your maid myself, but you resist.
Now, someone has got to get in there and flush that room out with bleach or the bacteria and other grime is going to just add to your ailments and make you sicker.
You say you want to get better and then you sabotage the help. Please, I’m sorry if you don’t like hearing it but trust me, even a real lion’s den is hosed down everyday….
Stop being a piglet and either ask MamaC to clean it, Kareem, or (as your last option, please…) I will come and do it myself!
Love, John
I know this sounds harsh, but my father is a no BS kind of guy from Brooklyn. He'd rather hear a direct point being made than any syrupy talk. Sorry if any of what I am writing has offended....
Here was the result:
His wife wrote me this a few hours ago:
"Hi John,
I found the culprit, there was residual urine spilling over to the bottom storage container beside JB's chair. I Will clean both the bottom and the top container on a DAILY BASIS from now on with a good disinfectant. Regarding the EXPENSIVE ANIMAL URINE CLEANER, I don't think that we'll need it at this time. Regarding the GLASS CONTAINERS for him to urinate in, I don't want to use any GLASS around JB because he BRUISES AND CUTS very easily and then it becomes a huge problem of coagulating his blood. I will have to continue purchasing the plastic containers ( which are lighter in weight) but will WASH AND DISCARD them more frequently. Thanks for the idea of a dish washer, but I don't wish I had a dish washer - running HOT WATER and patience works equally as well. We'll talk."
I'm not responding quickly enough, it seems.... Demensia huh? He seems so lucid but then he is showing very subtle signs of degraded effort mentally. My wife's mother has it, or Alzheimers (which I thought were interchangeable), and she went down fully and is now forgetting how to walk as she is in a wheelchair so much.
Judging from the other threads I am seeing on this site, I am about the zillionth person to be going through this. I figured as much, but was really looking for an outlet, as many here may be as well, not so much to vent but to expose the doctor. I know it sounds petty but how many are under his care? How many others are being neglected as he rings the register? I should just move on but find it hard to do so.
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