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I can feel your pain because it's the same situation I was in many years ago. My father lived with me for the last 9 years of his life and at first, he was able to come and go, travel, shop, etc. but around age 75 or 76, he started declining rapidly with the COPD getting the better of him. I was the only one of three children who would allow him to bring his dog (around 9-10 years then) with him to live with me. The dog eventually lost control of his urine and "'tested" all parts of my living room furniture, his bedroom furniture, and just about everything he came in contact with. He tried to take him out all the time so he could urinate outside but sometimes, male dogs spray just a little on everything they have in a house. I guess it's marking his territory. Of course, I worked a full time 40-50 hour job then came home and had to routinely get pet cleaner out and rags/brushes and clean the legs of my furniture and carpets. I also had carpet cleaning companies on speed dial and cleaned them on a regular basis until I finally bought a carpet cleaner to save money. I eventually had to start walking him at night because my dad was no longer able to do that and when he went in the hospital, he asked me the dreaded question...When I'm gone, will you take care of my dog for me? A death bed request is hard to say no to so I said I would as long as I could. He was satisfied and within days he passed at the age of 80. I tried to take care of him after that for months. I started coming home for lunch so I could let him out and my brother finally said this is insanity. Lets take him to a vet. I was run ragged trying to uphold a promise and still work and eventually my furniture started showing the wear of the dog. I asked my brother to go with me and we found a non-kill shelter and my brother talked to them about keeping him so he could go outside sometimes. He was so old his face had gray hair on it and not the black it used to have. I don't know if they took him out back and put him down but I knew I had no choice but to do this or I would have wound up in the hospital as well. I felt guilty for a long time but I knew it was for the best as he too, was whimpering from pain when we touched him. If your grandma doesn't really know where she's at or whether she saw the dog or not, you can do what I did and take him to a no-kill shelter and they will take care of it for you. If and when your grandma asks about the dog, tell her he was here just a minute ago, don't you remember? She will probably smile and say oh yeah. Eventually you can tell her that a cousin or someone else took the dog for awhile so you could concentrate on taking care of her and she'll see him later. She will eventually forget. Good luck and hope it goes well.
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Since Grandma may not be able to process the information as to why it would be humane to put Ellie down, if I were in your situation I would tell her what my husband's mother told him when he was 7 years old; his dog needed more space to run and play so she gave his dog to a nice farmer who had a large farm. I am 85 and still sharp, but it's fine with me if my children tell me well intentioned lies if I start losing focus. I like to believe that my beloved cats have all gone over The Rainbow Bridge.
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Meghan

I had to do this twice and I am not sure if you will have the same results I did, but...
My 92 year old mom lived with me for 2 years. When she moved in, she brought her 20 year old Siamese cat and 13 year old German shepherd. Mom loved her pets. The dog developed a tumor and it was time. Due to the Alzheimer's sometimes the dog was mine and sometimes it was hers. I put the dog down when she was away at daycare and I told her when she got home. Of course, she remembered the dog was hers that day and she mourned and missed her but she did accept it. The dog was obviously struggling.

About a year later the cat, needed to go down. She was urinating all over my house. Every time I tried to talk to her about it, she would get very angry with me, she was going to go home and bury her cat in her own back yard, etc. etc. (In my mom's mind, she was just visiting me). By this time, her dementia was worse. I took the cat to vet while she was at daycare, got rid of all the cat stuff, told her the cat died, and when she got home and she just said "oh ok" and that was it. Out-of-sight out-of-mind.

What I would do - first have the conversation and see how she reacts. If she accepts it go ahead and do it. Secondly, there are vets that will come to the house and euthanize a pet at home. It is more expensive and I did think of doing this, but decided it wouldn't be a good idea. And lastly, she may not remember. I do not know how bad her dementia is, but I was shocked when I put the cat down and it was literally out-of-sight out-of-mind.

You have to think of the dog too, if she is suffering, please let her go.
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I just read this, and while I don't want to scare you, I think you should be aware of a possible downside. When my mom's cat had a stroke, he could no longer walk and the vet took it upon herself to euthanize him w/o mom's consent or knowledge. Mom was absolutely devastated and her health took a nosedive. She died soon afterwards. We all felt that losing that bond before she was ready contributed to her declining health.
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What's the likelihood of getting another dog if Elie is euthanized, which sounds as if it's appropriate now or soon. Your profile states that you're caring for your grandmother living at home; are you living there with her and would you feel you have enough time to care for a replacement dog?

When I had to have my cats euthanized (at nearly 20 years of age), my vet sent me a touching emotional condolence card. Although I don't remember the specific wording, it was something to the effect that they provided love, comfort and companionship to me for years. Now it was my turn to acknowledge that, treat them with respect, and prevent them from any further suffering.

If you don't feel comfortable getting another pet, perhaps you can get a large toy dog that looks very real and keep it near your grandmother.
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WOW I would ask the vet for some advice on this. If he can gently explain to her that the dog is suffering, she may allow it to happen. I have taken pets in for the elderly. I spend time with them reminiscing about their life together, make sure they say their good byes and let grandma keep the collar as a memento. I cry right along with them, can't help it. Some vets will send the owner a paw print disc with the pet's name on it.
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