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Hi everyone, my 76 yr old (chronically ill) mom was hospitalized last year for bleeding diverticulitis. Then found to have C diff and put on antibiotics. She did receive a blood transfusion. When discharged she had no appetite and till this date has none. Every time that she is hospitalized she comes home with some idiosyncrasy. Has anyone had to deal with something like this??? Of course things are more difficult because she is an insulin dependent diabetic.
Thanks for anyone' input.

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I have experienced this myself. I know that when my own mother is hospitalized, she listens in to what the dr. says about other patients, just HAS to know what is going on with the other people in her room, and what they have, asks the nurses all about them, etc. Finally one day a nurse shut her up by saying "now, dear, you wouldn't like it if your personal medical info was made public to all the other patients now, would you?"
It seems that nobody can be more sick than her, have more problems than her, etc. If your mother is narcissistic as mine is, than she will believe that all the attention and focus should be on her, her medical problems are the most important and more important than anyone else in the hospital, etc.
The more medications she can get the better, because it gives her importance when she is discharged, and then she can tell her friends on the phone "oh the dr. says I have pneumonia now, isn't that awful, so he has put me on the strongest antibiotic you can get".
They seem to feed off others in the hospital, copying their symptoms and telling everyone that they have this, that and the other. Of course this is beyond us because why would someone want to be sick with something they don't even have (that's a normal person's way of thinking).
I will never forget what happened one day before my mother came to live with us. I call a call from her friend telling me that "she was rushed to emerg. last night, I stayed with her til midnight but you better get in there to see her". Well my mother lived in a town an hour away and I don't drive.
I had to get my son to take a day off university and in a blinding snowstorm drive out there, only to find her stuck in a bay in the emerg dep't, mad as a bear after having stayed in overnight, and having them tell me that "there is nothing wrong with her, we are discharging her because we need the beds".
When I got there, she wasn't even dressed. She was furious that she wasn't being kept in ......... why?? because then she would have to go home and do for herself!! She just wanted the royal treatment of a constant attention and sympathy supply, not to mention the meals!! That way she wouldn't have to do anything herself! It absolutely disgusted me and this happened a few times.
She actually told one friend that they let her go home because "there was nothing more they could do for me in my condition......" What BS!!
I have found that once they get to a certain age, they have to have a million things wrong with them, because that is all people that age talk about with each other. Especially if they live alone, they have to have something to talk about and then they try to one-up each other with their disgusting medical details. This gives them the attention and sympathy that they seek and will blab to anyone who will listen.
Where I live it is about 65% elderly. You can never say, hi how are you, because you will be subject to a litany of medical and physical complaints. Why they think this is interesting to anyone is beyond me.
There is so much more to talk about!!
PS mine is diabetic too but lies about it to anyone she can corral - it's so she can eat whatever she wants and it gives her a "thrill" to get away with eating the "forbidden" foods.
Next time your mother is hospitalized, get the dr. to come and speak to her before she is released so it can be explained to her exactly what she does or doesn't have, and write it down yourself. You can use this later to make it clear to her. Also, keep a list of her medications so when she starts with "oh he put Betty on another antibiotic, that's the one I should be on, blablabla" so you can clear up any misunderstandings; also, if and when she is admitted, speak to the charge nurse and also the day/night nurses so that they will be aware of her personality in this regard.
Lots of luck to you! Sure ain't easy........
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My friend's grandmother used to call an ambulance regularly. She'd get taken to the hospital, spend the night (this was 30 ago, when that was common practice) and, when she would realize they were going to discharge her because there was nothing wrong with her, she'd fall out of bed so they have to keep her! She was a real expert at it and would often do it right in front of someone so she couldn't be accused of just laying on the floor and yelling for help! She never broke a bone or had anything but a few small bruises.
This was a woman who had an adult son living with her who catered to her every need! Sadly, not a tear was shed at her funeral.
For some elderly there's never enough attention. They're addicted to a "poor me" lifestyle. I'd love to know what that syndrome is all about so I can look for warning signs of it in myself as I get older!
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Personally I would not take anyone to a hospital unless it is a severe emergency! My best friend went in, got an infection, went thru his whole body and killed him. I am a nurse, and I cannot work in a traditional medical facility, as I have seen and experienced horrendous practices with my own eyes!
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I hear you, IsntEasy!! As they get older they become very, very clever and devious at fooling doctors and other medical professionals....but you can only
cry wolf so many times. They become experts at it but sooner or later everyone is on to them and they get a record for doing this......I guess they have nothing else to do, want to be pampered and looked after so they don't have to do anything for themselves (mine is very lazy and loves nothing more than everyone running for her) and the desperation of it is pathetic.
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My Mother has this idealistic view of hospitals. She really believes that if she was admitted she would "get a rest." Give me a break - all she does is "rest" and hospitals were not what they were 40 years ago. You are lucky if you don't get c-diff or some other hospital infection. Back to the original question - my Father would come home from the hospital with strange behaviors. They would usually decrease with time in his own environment. He was sure that the doctors wanted his mucous because they were with the FBI??? WHAT!! The paranoia was real to him. Combination of different environment, routine and yes even some extra attention.
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Besides her physical health declining is her mental status declining as well? This forum is for caregiving those with dementia.
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I find that, every time my mom goes into the hospital or a care facility of some kind, she comes out with a larger chunk of her mind gone. It's like the "loss" process is accelerated in some way. Sometimes, she comes partway back, but not usually.
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My does not go to the hospital excuse we won't take her. We've caught on to this scam. I think this a part of her dementia. Some days she's fine and other days when you ask "how do you feel today" everything in the world is wrong.

On another note...she has become combative and everyone know her to be this meek and mild, sweet teacher that everybody loved in school. I catch pure he'll as her daughter and primary caretaker. She bucks every little thing that I say and do.
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Wait, what, Ferris? This forum is just for caring for those with dementia? I don't think that is true. I thought this was a forum for "connecting people caring for elderly parents" of any condition. Am I wrong. Seriously? Not being a stinker , I really do not think this forum is for dementia caregivees only.
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