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He has COPD and many other issues. How do I stop him? I have tried everything including asking his DR! I've stated not good for his health, cost too much, smelly, won't help his current chronic cough, he could do something else, a hobby, walk ect.. He's 77 and states he's MY father and a grown man and will walk to the store if I don't get him some. I actually went to our usual store and asked them to please not sell any to my dad... I feel bad for him but I'm at loss on what to do... He has lived with me since his stroke in December of 2011. Doctors say he doesn't have dementia but I think other wise... Any suggestions on how I can encourage him NOT to smoke? I have even tried distracting him with his favorite ice cream but he starts right back in asking as soon aas the ice cream is gone..

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He's addicted, and I've heard that cigarettes are the worse kind of addiction to rid yourself of. If you really didn't buy them for him, is he physically able to actually walk himself to the store? I just asked my husband this question since he's a smoker. He says, just don't buy them for him. Could it be that simple? I don't know.
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Try some of the Commit lozenges. Some people have good luck with them. Your father is going to have to want to quit before he'll be able to do it. Maybe there is something that will make him want to -- health won't work. Sometimes fun things, e.g. romance and going out with non-smokers, can help.
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If all it took was encouragement from a relative to quite smoking, would there be anyone smoking?

Each time my mother has been in the hospital or rehab, she has had a nicotine patch to help her get through the non-smoking period. As soon as she returned home she took up smoking again, each time.

She could live in the same apartment building as her sister, and wouldn't that be nice? But, no, Sister's building is non smoking and Ma could not give up smoking even for that.

I don't think your chances of talking "him" out smoking a real good. If he wants to, that is a different situation altogether, of course.
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Possibly you could put a time limit on his smoking. Maybe he would agree to taper off, and stop smoking altogether, perhaps by the end of the year.
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He hasn't smoked for over over 30 years, he wants to start again :(
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Sorry for not including that tidbit earlier... kind of stressed.
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He's addicted to a drug called nicotine, and very powerful. Check with his MD first, the patches will step in and stop the nicotine craving--affix on torso. Then you have the problem of the hand/mouth body mechanics. I've helped a lot of people quit, using a combination of the patch, finger-type foods (popcorn, etc). and maybe a low dose of tranquilizer in the first two weeks or so. Just an idea that has worked for a lot of friends, but of course they wanted desperately to stop, but just couldn't on their own. Always check with the M.D.
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Have you given any thought to the electronic cigarette? Yes, I know that some people say "those are bad for you too".......well, if you want him to stop or at least to stop smoking in the house, you might consider one. What they are inhaling and exhaling is nothing more than water vapor. But they still get the sense of nicotine which is what they are addicted to. Smoking IS an addiction....I am an ex-smoker which is worse than someone who has never smoked!
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Jam has an excellent idea. No one can tell you better than an ex-smoker what that habit will do to you. You are fortunate to still have your Dad at age 77. If he hasn't quit by now, he never will short of the grave. Sorry to be so blunt, but I'm sitting here typing this with an oxygen canula in my nose, and an electronic cigarette charging in one of my USB ports, and another charged and am actively smoking it now. They literally saved my life. I was dying, knew it, and still smoked real cigarettes, until last November. It took me about a week to do the switch. I'm still addicted to nicotine, but the e-cig conveys like a cigarette, with proplene glycol as the carrying agent. It tastes remarkably like the real thing. feels heaver, is actually cheaper, has no "yellow haze"and is odorless. I smoke them in my parents house, something I'd NEVER do with the real thing. I turned 56 in June, and my Dr says that now I'll live to 100 barring other problems. Right now, the O2 for me is a crutch, I'm still scared I'll go into respiratory distress, so i run the oxygen now and then. I did kill my lungs tho, but they are healing now, never be able to run, but I'll live (God Willing) to see my 4th Grandchild born in January. BUY HIM ONE AND NOTHING ELSE. HE WILL GET USED TO IT. He's lived to 77, my husband didn't see 50. Thank the Lord you've had him this long, buy the e-cig. Best of luck, I'll say a prayer.

Be Well - Sue
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Asil63 is your father in his own home or yours ?
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Electronic cigarettes would be my suggestion. A few family members have quit real cigarettes and just love the electronic ones and I'm going to get started myself. I really like the ones I've tried. You can try to substitute ice cream and candy, etc., for cigarettes, but as a smoker, I'll tell you that it won't help at all with the "habit" part. With me, there's something psychological about the act of smoking itself. I love candy, but I crave the nicotine and the hand to mouth smoking part of my nasty habit. The vapor cigarettes don't make my hair and clothes smell, and I don't have to go outside in 110 degrees to get that smoke I'm always jones-ing for! I'm pretty excited about switching.
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I know you are worried about him and that is sweet. If he is not in your home and he is not borrowing money for them ,let him smoke.I am not a smoker and I understand your aversion. My obese gma loved food and I only feed my family healthy items. If it wasn't fried she threw it in the floor and it used to upset me so. Food was the only thing that brought her joy and at that point she would never be healthy, the damage was done. It sounds like it brings him happiness. Best of luck.
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I appreciate all your answers! My dad does live in my home and hasn't smoked for over 30 years!! His wanting to suddenly start again has been quite an issue. My husband does not permit any smoking in the house and is afraid if we allow him to smoke outside with my dads memory issues he'll smoke in the middle of the night and set something on fire.. I am afraid of that as well as for his health.. with 6 open heart surgeries and copd smoking is really not a good choice for him yet he is persistent on starting again after all these years. Maybe an ecig is a an option.
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Hi Asil63!

You posted an update that your Dad had stopped smoking for over 30 years?

Has he started back again since asking for them? Some stroke patients do have regions of their brain activated or reactivated (old habits, or suddenly cursing and angry when that was never part of their personality), and some do begin to have mild dementia, etc.

The suggestion for an electronic cigarette is a great!

See if you can get away with it. Maybe tell him Dr said because of his stroke it's the only type he can have - may or may not work.

If it does not work, it will come down to quality of life as you cannot both constantly lock heads over it.

Ask the doctor if any patch, etc., he can recommend you try that would be Okay with any meds he may be taking as a back-up.

So sorry you are all going through this. Keep us posted! all the best!
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Oh, just saw your last post...sounds like he still has not started back.

Other thing with COPD is that as it gets worse, he may get to the point he needs oxygen - BTW, do you know what his Oxygen level currently is?

When levels drop, will also have more dementia like effects on person, weekness, etc. You can have Nurse check, and Oximeter prices have come down, to the point you can buy them on sale at stores like Walgreens for less than $50, some times on sale for $39.99

He may already need to be on Oxygen, in which case, should not smoke if at all possible. Not an easy situation.

Keep us posted!
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Two things: second hand smoke more deadly than inhaled smoke; risk of fire from smoking. That said I know of lifelong smokers who switched to ecigs successfully. Also had a friend with Altz who entered the hospital and by the time she returned to her assisted living "forgot" she was ever a smoker (of course they got rid of all the evidence). Good luck.
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