What do you do when a young elder hardly old enough to be called an elder in their 60's is embracing the idea that they are old and acting like they are disabled when they aren't? Using their age and condition as an excuse to avoid things they don't want to do or responsibilities they don't want to have - yet when they think no one notices suddenly they have plenty of strength and stamina? I'm not sure how to deal with this person - this is not about my parent but someone I will be responsible for in their older years. I worry a great deal about the future with this relative for her own well-being as well as for what this means for me. I've never seen someone trying so hard to embrace infirmity before. I cannot give more details so feel free to answer this question in general terms.