In a few months we will be placing my mom into an Assisted Living facility. She is eligible for VA assistance; however, we are missing one important piece of paperwork. Does anyone have any suggestions?

I have been trying to get VA assistance for my mom, who's a widow of a Vietnam veteran. The process can be overwhelming. Have you tried getting help from your local VA office? I went to my local office, and even though my Mom lives out of state, they were able to help me with locating paperwork and filling out the forms.

You can use ancestory.com for free for 2 weeks. If you can find a record of the death certificate the site will give you details on ordering a certificate. It is one more avenue to try. Good luck.

Is anyone helping you with compliling all this documentation? There are some great companies that will do this for you - they know all the ins and outs of this crazy process. If your Mom is going to a ALF or NH they have companies that will do it for free. If not, call your local ALFs and ask who they use.

Is there anyone in her family that you can talk to? Her doctor and the funeral home has to have this info. A relative must have a copy as well. Did she have children? This would be my first suggestion.

If you have someone who is computer savvy, they could search online. Anything public should be accessible.

If all else fails, gather all the information you have on her and hire a private investigator - should not be that expensive. They also know how to locate this info.
good luck