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Found her astray in livingroom next to her air machine. She had always promised to keep it in dinningroom and only smoked there.
When questioned why it was there she said she had brought it in to make sure it went out.
I told her never do that. She said its my home and I do what I want. Tried to explain it was not a safe move and that I would not buy her cigerettes if I found it in there again.

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If something is unsafe for your mom how do you handle telling her it can not be done?
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I think that you already answered your question. You told her you wouldn't buy her smokes if she did it again, I see nothing wrong with shocking her a little to remember not to do it again. Good job.
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I think you did the right thing by what you said to her she may yell and screem and go all mad -but you have to do what has to be done for her safety-remember there are nosy people out there who will call APS at the drop of a hat-a fraid said you mother had dementia and one day got a ladder to climb up on and the neighbors reported her to APS she asked the neighbors where were they when she needed help with her mother.
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You did good! Thru exhustion, I'm finding that tough love is the answer. If she has enough hootspah to tell you something, have the same hootspah to tell her straight. I was babying my parents but got tired of it. Their pretty much in their right minds and have the do as I damn will attitude, so I say well if you decide to do xyz against your better judgement dont expect me to pass out if you're found sleeping permanently. Yeah I get cross looks but it's working.
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