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My elderly mother is being prayed upon by a man 20+ years her junior and who has a reputation for scamming elderly women by moving into their homes under the guise that he is a nurse. He has a pattern of elder abuse with addresses and aliases in numerous states. He lures these women and gets access to their finances, a POA or marries them, they pass away, he takes their assets, and moves onto another unsuspecting elderly woman in need of companionship. Our family was warned about him; however my mother doesn't recognize what he is doing, worming his way into her life. He discusses health and finances with her and tells her he would like to take her all over the world - everything she wants to hear. She defends him vehemently, telling us how wonderful he is, and how he can take care of her We need to protect our mother from him before it is too late. Her mind is starting to fail her and we are afraid he is going to make a move any moment. What can we do?!

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Since he's done this before, and obviously you've found out about it, I would go directly to the police and ask what can be done, as well as whether there are outstanding warrants and/or charges pending against him. If he's moving from state to state and using aliases, it sounds as if he's trying to stay one step ahead of the law.

I'm not sure but I believe that crimes in various states justifies FBI intervention; I would contact them as well to see what they can do to help. There may even be a federal task force on elder fraud.

Also, if he's passing as a nurse, it's some type of false impersonation as well as misrepresentation, pretending to be licensed for a profession which he apparently hasn't taken the exam. That would be some kind of misdemeanor or felony, as well as other charges, of which I'm not sure....especially if he's "administering" medical care. A medical board in each state might be able to bring charges against him for impersonating a licensed medical professional.

How does he identify his targets?

Has your mother executed a DPOA for anyone in your family? If so, you could use it to get a PPO against him.

If not, and if she does grant him authority under a DPOA with a "failing mind", elder financial exploitation could be added to the charges.

But the real question is what can you do to stop him?

You may have to apply for an emergency guardianship.

Another option is to see an attorney skilled in elder law litigation, and ask him about getting a TRO (Temporary Restraining Order) against this man. There may be a way to do this as something like a Next Friend suit. This is normally for an adult on behalf of a minor, but I believe it's also been used for a vulnerable adult. Given that she's beginning to become less coherent, she might fall under this category, and a TRO could stop him from contacting her lest he be apprehended and removed by the police (or put in jail if there are outstanding warrants).

It's been decades since I've done any work in this area, so seeing a good litigator with elder law exploitation experience would be best to find out if this is feasible.

I would also gather as much information as I can about past crimes, and bring that data to the police when you go. They can contact other PDs, get more information, and coordinate to build a case against him.

It wouldn't hurt to also notify her bank, financial planner, holders of any stocks, etc., about this situation and put them on alert. Even if you don't have a DPOA, perhaps they can take extra precautions and demand extra documentation if he attempts to wipe out her assets.

Sometimes amateur gumshoe operations can work as well. Post his photo on telephone poles in your mother's neighborhood, asking neighbors to contact you if they spot him. Then descend on your mother's house, wait for him to leave and surround him. I would be tempted to do a little bit more, but perhaps intimidation might be a start.

There's an excellent but sad story of someone else who battled with a similar exploitation. Good advice has been offered; unfortunately, the senior in that case also was resistant to family intervention. But it might be comforting to know that you're not alone.

https://www.agingcare.com/questions/widowed-grandparent-being-sweetheart-scammed-188810.htm


There are also other threads as well as articles on this subject:

https://www.agingcare.com/search.aspx?searchterm=senior+being+exploited+by+scamming+woman
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Find the nuclear option and press detonate. These scam artists know how to work the elderly...alienate and isolate them from family...give them all the attention their family may not...and, in the blink of an eye? Mom is willingly and eagerly signing over or gifting her assets away. Act quickly.
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Do everything that GardenArtist and Maggie suggested but I would also consult with an attorney about gaining guardianship over your mom. Granted, it doesn't happen overnight and it sounds like time is of the essence here but it wouldn't hurt to consult with a lawyer anyway.

In the meantime see if you can get POA for your mom. That's something that can be done immediately and would give you a little insulation from this predator.
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