Dual POA- siblings not speaking. Need to clear home and have estate sale. What do you suggest?

Things that have real value of course can not be distributed but very little in the average home has real monetary value, IMO spending thousands on storage fees over what may possibly be many years is completely ridiculous despite what your lawyer is telling you. Is there anyone who can act as an impartial mediator between you?

(When my grandmother died we were all invited to attend her estate sale and bid on any keepsakes we wanted)

As POA you have to do what needs to be done.
If you are acting in good faith and doing what needs to be done properly and legally it will hold up in court if it comes to that.
I would send her notification in writing Certified with confirmation of delivery, giving her the date and time the appraisal is going to take place.
If you move anything to storage document every item (might even be best if you took photos of everything going into storage.) If items are to be sold notify her of what is going to be sold and when and how. Again certified letters for all communication.
(and I would deduct excess attorney fees from her portion of the estate. But that is if there is anything left since the money raised will be used for mom's care)

Too late now, but an attorney advised us that dual POAs are a bad idea. He, as a judge, probably saw a lot of friction. It sounds like she may be attempting to block any action by you. Check the papers for conditions of the POA, such as no response in 30 days that would nullify her duties as a POA. You could then proceed with the required business. An unoccupied house may only be insurable for a certain length of time. My mother is living and competent, but my sister's inattention to Mama's needs necessitated action on my part.

Give her what she wants... and be done with it. Attorney or no. Family is more important than squabbling over trifles. Lawyers just love to make big money especially in times that are the toughest on those who are left behind after a loved one is leaving us permanently. No sense in making things worse. When my Dad died my mother whose dementia was manifesting much worse since she dropped to a new level of it-- well, she dumped all his thing-- took them to the thrift shop she was so angry he had "left" her. That included his military uniforms with all the brass I used to polish for him. Gone. But I forgave her and took care of her for 20 years before she graduated to heaven. Sometimes you gotta just let it go. Good luck. As Jesus said, forgive them, they know not what they do. And your sister will figure it out someday and ask your forgiveness.

NO STORAGE! Try to be open to what sis wants? Remember this is about what mom would want. Would she want sis to pay for those things? The value that an appraiser will place on things is pennies on the dollar. Don't make a big deal of it.

Twisted sissies decided to put items into storage with the intent of getting it out, SOMETIME. That was four years ago now. Things finally out of storage last August. How much was spent on storage over that four years? More than $25,000.00! Four years later TS was claiming no value to any of the items!

Out of sight out of mind. Try to be reasonable and do as mom would do.

Distributing household items do not need to impact Medicaid eligibility only if they are appraised then sold for less than appraised value.. Imagine the Medicaid back up for applications if household items were to be scrutinized! You don't want to open up that Pandora's box.

If mom is of reasonably sound mind, have her sign papers taking sister off as POA and an updated POA done listing you, only. The lawyer can handle this. Otherwise, put everything into storage until Mom passes where the will will take over.

The attorney ought to have explained that the assessed value of any goods your sister removes now will be considered a gift should your mother need to apply for Medicaid in the next five years, surely. No?

The idea of deducting anything from an inheritance which is necessarily hypothetical seems a bit nebulous to me. Unless your mother is so very well off that not even medical and ALF bills can ever make a dent in her finances - but in that case, can the chattels matter so much?

What's the rush with the sale? I mean, I agree it's not good for houses to be unoccupied (things fall apart, waste of good tax money, etc.); and I can understand that you would very much like to get things tidied up; but if push comes to shove is there anything forcing the pace, such as your mother's needing the funds for her ALF?

Only it strikes me that a period of diplomatic silence from you while the attorney gently reminds sister of the responsibilities she accepted with dual POA, and your mother's best interests, and all that, might give her time to collect herself and start behaving. Can you afford to give her that space?

If you can't (or can't be bothered, which would be fair enough too), you could print the appraiser's appointment details on a piece of paper and post it to her. Put "in haste, with compliments" and your initials if you don't feel it should be as blank as that, but don't add another word.

You can't win, you see - if you're conciliatory, she'll either sneer or try to take advantage and then have another fit when she doesn't get it; if you're jolly or humorous, she'll think you're taking the mickey; and if you're business-like she'll accuse you of being insensitive and having no concept of sentimental value. So don't say anything.

I was toying with putting "FYI" - but DON'T. Sarcastic.

Type the envelope. Then she won't bin it unopened.

Or you could email the appraiser to - hem-hem - "confirm" the appointment and cc your sister in on it.

If your mom is still alive, then technically if there are items of large value the proceeds from the sale should go toward your mom's care. I'm surprised your lawyer didn't mention this. Is your mom self pay or is she on Medicaid (or likely to need it soon)? If your mom is well off now, her assets can go fast and there may very well be no inheritance. A lot of times sibling disagreements over family property are not about the value of the property in monetary terms but in sentimental terms or in symbolizing parental care for the respective siblings. "Dad loved me more than you . He wanted me to have XYZ." You mention having an estate sale and sister's inheritance--does this mean your mother has passed away? If so, the dual POA arrangement ceases on her death. Are you the sole executor or are you and sister dual executors? If yo uare sole executor it would simplify things and you'd have to proceed as needed even if your sister refuses to participate. If she is a beneficiary in your mom's will, then as executor you'd need to officially notify of her the value of the estate once the house is sold, her share of the inheritance, etc. If you need to put items in storage to get the house cleared out, I think the your mom's estate could cover the costs.

Your mom must have some expensive items! My brother and I don't talk either. We both took turns cleaning mom's house, no lawyer needed. He came out for a couple of weeks two times and did his thing while I was at work. He could and her caregivers could have taken things that had value I didn't know about, but I didn't care, except for some 100 year old coins I wanted. Who knows where they went? Furniture had to be practically given away. I took all bills and anything that might get stolen, and cleared out her house, except for furniture. Anything left got hauled away by a needy family the realtor knew. I sold a few dishes, a sofa, and mom's tv/stand for $200 total on Facebook marketplace and used it for her care. It sounds like your sister is mad about everything getting tallied to take away from her inheritance. I would be mad too, feeling like there's no trust. My brother took tens of thousands from mom and I didn't take a penny, but if mom passes, and there is anything left, we each would receive half. Is it fair? No, but I don't need mom's money and wouldn't care if she didn't have anything left. Her money and your mom's money and any proceeds from the sale of her property should go towards her care. I wish you the best on this journey.

Do what the lawyer says. Dont let the house sit. My sister lied to me and left house sit 8yrs. Told me she was POA and executor of the will and she will handle it. Found out she was neither. Went to court. No will.
You should listen to your lawyer and get going on this. Do not let house sit vacant with valuables!!!!!!
The neighbors were dumping their trash on the property all that time and stealing anything not nailed down. I had to pay thousands to clean it up. She let the heat get shut off yrs ago. Ruined the floors, and beams in basement that held up house are crumbling. A house with no heat gets damp in about 3 days. So now its 8yrs. House is toast. Cant be fixed. All because she didnt feel like dealing with it. She stole valuables and left country.

Do not let this go on and clear your moms house. Your sister can be a part of the solution or she can go sulk. Let her. At least you can salvage your moms property. Dont let neighbors find out she is gone or they will break into the house. Get moving on this right away! Time is of the essence. The neighbors will start watching your comings and goings. Dont even trust a friendly neighbor!!!
Just ignore sibling and get moving. Or you will both have nothing left. She will come around when items needed to be sold off for moms care. Or you will take care of it. Get that house emptied ASAP!!!