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Mother is ill for several years w/heart condition. One doc said she "may" have early dementia. I notice things like a little memory loss like I told her something yesterday and she forgets it today. Or even forgets in the same day. Some repeating, not a lot.

Here is the question: At times, we can have a totally normal conversation and at others, it is all confusing to me. I get so confused that I think it's me at time. She gets angry at me and will not listen to anything I say that I did not mean to get her angry.

So can, a person be angry at seem to be forgetting at times and then at others times seems totally normal and back to the way they once were which was kind and caring?

Thank you.

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Yes, they can.This is the cruel ,maddening thing about dementia. At first there may be no clear cut lines that leave you in no doubt that your loved one has a problem.Just some ideas, but start looking at things at how well is she able to keep her house clean,check the refrigerator for the kinds of food she has and if anything has been sitting there for a while, is she able to maintain her hygiene,is she managing her finances correctly, does she have unpaid bill sitting around? The anger may be coming from fear, she may be aware enough to know something isn't "right" about herself but just can't put her finger on it. I know I would be scared if I started getting the "feeling" I was starting to mentally slip.It would, at least for me, make me feel vulnerable, and no one likes to feel that way. Start reading up on the stages of dementia,arm yourself with knowledge, don't take things she says personally,also dementia is not your fault and if it is dementia realize you can't fix it, you can only deal with it. Be proactive and don't be afraid for your mother to get angry with you.
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Good advice above.

In retrospect we see things we couldn't process at first. I knew something was wrong, but couldn't put my finger on it. Even professionals may not pick up on it.

Some things I saw in my loved one were, odd behavior, such as throwing her banana peels in the front yard; hoarding, insisting food in the fridge would last forever; wearing ill fitting clothes without concern; claiming items in her home were moved, when they weren't; avoiding social and family gatherings; forgetting to prepare meals; posting post its of tv shows and reminders of things she normally knew, etc. And the biggest thing was the repeating of stories that she had already told me an hour before. Even when I would tell her she had just told me the story, she would ignore it and insist on telling me the story over and over.

There was an anger phase, but once that passes, it seems they may forget to be angry anymore. I haven't seen any anger for awhile now. I suppose each person is different though.
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If the issue is just conversations, one has to wonder if the elder is having a hearing issue.

If new people meet my Mom [97] they would think she has dementia because they will ask her something and she will answer with something that isn't related to what was asked. Then I have to jump in and say Mom is very hard of hearing, but once she finally hears the topic [I have to be a walking thesaurus], she can have a normal conversation. Example, once she catches the word "football", stand back, she's a walking stat machine on pro football.
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