Does anyone know if one glass of wine is ok for someone with dementia?

Beekee, your rude comment was not necessary!!

NobodyGetsIt, I like reading your replies on this site. You have always been respectful on this site. You have a lot to offer this Forum and one can't please everyone. There is not one thing wrong in sending support via Bible verses in my opinion. I find them refreshing and comforting. I tried to send you a private message the other day and could not send it now I know why. Please stay on this Forum. Know there are some people here that really appreciate your kindness and support. Hugs to you!

These threads are becoming too religious for me, and too much backbiting and baiting each other, rather than responding to the original poster's issue. I never realized until recently how many nutcase evangelicals were on this forum. And apparently you all have no one else to argue with online, now that the hate groups and conspiracies have been kicked off of Facebook.

Lets remember all of us are stressed to the max trying to do the best for our loved ones. Be generous and be kind. Everyone's story is different.

My mom enjoys a small cocktail with her neighbors every afternoon. It was approved by her doctor.

I,assume he’s not driving and not able to get out on his own. You can buy alcohol free wine and beer. My mom has dementia and enjoys a glass of wine or a cold beer occasionally. You have to control the situation. Don’t leave him alone with a full bottle.

Imho, it's a no if your father takes medication, although red wine in small amounts has been said to be beneficial.

Well anyone on here knows my Mom has her 2 glasses of Port every night.. sometimes it goes well and once in awhile she gets loopy! Her FD and her Cardiologist say let it go! She is 90 YO and has not much happiness left. BTW she also smokes about a pack a day, and they have given up on the not smoking issue also! It is what it is,, and if she is happy at 90 YO,, so be it. She is not going to live forever, and believe me she does not want to.. so I just want her happy while she is still here

If the doctor ok's it, I would say do it. My mom loved her "glass of wine" but she was pouring it herself, and then forgot that she had some already and just kept pouring another and another some days. Hopefully somebody will be serving dad the appropriate amount. It is a joy to see them enjoy a glass of wine.

No not good--- only makes it worse and can lead to falls.

I would check with the doctor first because IF he is on any medications it might interfere.  Could you just buy some grape juice and/or cranberry juice (water down slightly) and let him know you got some and poured it into a glass for him.  and it might make the hallucinations worse.......wishing you luck

In their reality a wine glass with a nonalcoholic wine substitute would also give the ambiance of the experience which is what most people are looking for at that point --to belong to normal. It would be a good chance to join and make it special for you both.

My mother-in-law suffered from advanced dementia. She was probably an alcoholic. We think she had been frequently refilling her coffee cup (with boxed wine a family member bought for her) through the day, but it may have been to get calories since she was eating poorly and very thin. We were concerned because of her lack of nutrition, dementia, hallucinations, and meds.
When we obtained guardianship and brought her to live with us, we cut her back to a couple small glasses of wine daily for a week or so, adding nutritious snacks and meals that she could chew (no teeth) and digest (celiac disease). Then we decreased it to one glass of wine, while adding a glass of cranberry juice a day which she loved. Finally she was enjoying an afternoon glass of cranberry juice with slices of cheese, never missing the wine.
I purchased cranberry juice that was 100% juice, sweetened with other juices, NOT sugar added or artificial sweeteners, and poured it into pretty little glasses that she could easily handle. She also loved bowls of yogurt with fruit, and after early dinners, small bowls of natural vanilla ice cream.
Staying well hydrated helped to reduce the craving for alcohol, a strategy I use myself when stress tempts me to pour another glass of wine that I know I don't need or really want!

I would ask his doctor who is aware of all of his meds. When you buy the wine, is it still a glass with dinner or his he drinking the whole thing? That would be important to share with the dr.

My husband used to drink ether wine or a beer with his evening meal. Now he'll mostly ask for water (shocker to me!) but every so often he'll ask for wine or a beer and he gets it. He's not on any opioid meds and doc is aware of the occasional glass or two with dinner.

Two years ago for a while he took to drinking a high ball size glass of white wine like it was water at all hours of the day. So I resorted to watering wine quite significantly and he never noticed. Saved me the argument and threats about not providing wine and kept him out of trouble. That was just a phase.

So unless he's on meds that have strong contra indications I would give him his glass of wine! Seems like he lives alone from what you say, so may be you can buy the individual serving cans, bottles or even glass shaped containers they sell today.

When mom moved into Memory Care they gave her a glass a night. When she fell (not because of the wine) and came back from the hospital I worried about the wine with the pain meds. So I bought the little four packs of red wine and large bottle of the wine called Fre which is wine with the alcohol removed. I poured out the real wine from the small bottles and poured the Fre wine into them. She really never noticed the difference. Now that she is recovered, I leave a little “real” wine in the small bottles and fill the rest with the Fre wine. That way she gets some rest benefit from the real wine without too much alcohol and I can leave it fir her to drink when she wants.

I will occasionally give my dad a half of glass of red wine. It does relax him.
It is always a great idea and advisable to ask the doctor 1st. Make sure he can have wine with current meds.

Does the alcohol causes him some immediate behavioral change that is problematic? Does he become abusive? Violent? uncooperative? If not, let him enjoy a glass if that is what he wants.

Is dementia curable? No. Then why would a glass of wine hurt? And yet give temporary pleasure...

When my mother in law (a binge alcoholic) was in a nursing home she kept trying to leave to go get a beer. They asked me if it was okay to give her one of those half cans of beer once a day. She loved it, it didn't hurt her (because she could only get one can a day) and everyone was happy. So unless there is a safety or medical reason and you can control the intake then sure.

I used to give my mom a small glass of wine, nightly. Yes, she had Alzheimer's. Yes, she was on meds. The doctor knew about this.

Dementia steals so much from them, why not continue with a nightly glass that she enjoyed. And we will all die of something. If drinking the wine has a risk of death then give me more.

If I get dementia, I would rather die sooner than later. And maybe, just maybe, I it hastens deat

There's probably less alcohol in a glass of wine that in a shot of NyQuil. Don't know and don't care, really. I don't drink, but my MIL might drive me to it soon.

Speaking of MIL, her PCP recently told her to drink a glass or two of wine after dinner, hoping it would calm her down and help her sleep (anyone following my crazy story with MIL will remember she has not slept since I joined the family in '75)....my DH went and bought her the wine and she would NOT be seen in a liquor store and we don't have alcohol sold at Costco here in Utah.

It hasn't made her sleepy, she reports, but I think at least it takes the edge off her awful personality. My DH bought her 2 bottles and said to make it last (joking)..he doesn't care if she chugged both bottles.

Back in my GGfather's day, he was also told to take a 'tot of sherry' for his blood every night. That was over 100 years ago.

Haileybug---calm down, OK? Caring for the elderly is NOT a one size fits all. We appreciate your comments, but we're all dealing with so many different issues--

My mom is 98,,with dementia..and at this time in her life a small glass of wine 🍷 is a must with her cumber sandwiches 😋

If he is on any of the medications for Alzheimer's disease, he should not drink alcohol. Alcohol increases the effects of the medications - leading to overdosage effects. However, 1 glass of wine daily will not create more dementia. Of course, you will need to be the bartender since I doubt your dad can remember to limit himself to just one.

My mother is just about to finish year 4 in MC. ANYTHING they eat, drink or swallow other than food and beverage provided by the facility requires doctor approval. I was surprised to see she was allowed a small glass of wine (I forget now how many ounces), but the facility doesn't provide it. I didn't request this, it was just there in mom's file at the facility. I did get some help picking some out for her, as I can't even stand the smell of wine, never mind drinking it! I had no clue what to buy. I only did this a few times, preferably when I was there visiting and having a meal, so I could observe too. She sipped it. She didn't guzzle it down. She was FINE. I only did this a few times, with the small boxes of wine. Wasn't sure if she was getting it all herself or even what days as I was not there every day. She hasn't had any in quite some time.

Her dementia started before the move to MC, as much as 2 years, but was very early stages back then, and we had to wait for the place we chose to complete the rebuild and open each level in stages. She was never really a big drinker, but liked an occasional drink. The point here is that she was no longer in the "early" stages, but doc approved her having some. I think there were other residents who were allowed a glass of beer (also not provided by facility.)

I see NO harm in allowing someone with dementia to have one small glass of wine/day with a meal (see next paragraph.) Obviously we're not suggesting handing a whole bottle over to our LOs!!! Assumption is that he lives with you, so you have to ensure he won't dip into that open bottle. Perhaps find a way to mark the bottle, so you know none's been taken on the sly!

That said:
Although it certainly may be okay for those with dementia, it would be best to get approval from his doctor, which you've indicated you plan to do. Primary concern would be interaction with any medication he is taking and secondary would be the hallucinations. Some medications can't be taken with alcohol (alcohol might negate what the meds do sometimes, while other medications can enhance the effect of the alcohol.) If docs says there are no issues with medication or the hallucinations and approve it, I'd let him have the glass of wine with his meal. His time is limited, it isn't likely he's a drunk, just enjoys a glass a wine now and then. Why not make his day a little better, having his "treat"? Perhaps not with every meal, but if he requests it and doc says it's okay, go for it! We all have so little pleasures left these days and it's worse for our aging LOs who have already lost so much. Have one with him and make a special toast!

For some interesting info, see this:

https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/benefits-of-wine#bottom-line

I've often read that a glass of wine/day is somewhat healthy for one. Antioxidants and all that. After reading through the link contents, I was bumming because I don't drink wine, BUT it also says:

"Although research suggests that drinking a glass of wine has several potential health benefits, they can also be obtained by eating a healthy diet.

In other words, if you didn’t drink wine before, you don’t need to start simply for the health benefits."

Woo Hoo! I can get the bennies without holding my nose and gagging down a glass of wine!! BUT, with doc approval and father request, go get that wine!

There is a BIG difference between a "glass of wine" at dinner and half a bottle of whiskey every night.

Of course check with his Dr but I have never seen anything written or other wise that says a glass of wine will harm any adult. Drinking a bottle a night. That is different.

I highly doubt one glass or even two glasses of wine is going to impact hallucinations

Think about it.. what is your concern? Is he going to drink a glass of wine then drive the car?? Go chase the neighbor lady around her kitchen??

He has dementia he is not going to get better, go back to work, start dating someone. Let him enjoy what time he has left doing what he wants to do.

Every evening my Father in law drank a glass (sometimes two) of scotch from the time he was in his 40s until I think he was 91, then he was not able to hold the glass. It was a small thing he enjoyed at the end of the day. His children were always saying how dangerous this was, etc,etc. He NEVER drove anywhere after dinner, He was retired, he wasn't drinking half the bottle everynight. I said leave him alone let him enjoy it, that he did until his last couple of years on this earth.

If there was a problem it was that for his Birthday and Xmas I would buy him some unique (expensive) bottle of Scotch one year I bought a 60 yr old bottle. He apprecieted the thought but could never taste the difference between that and the standard stuff at the store!!! He drank them all the same.

I'm not a doctor, and you should ask your fathers physician, but I've done a little research of my own about red wine. According to a National Institutes of Health publication, Resveratrol, an ingredient found in red wine (not white wine that I know of) has been found to be "active in the prevention of cardiovascular diseases". Specifically, it "penetrates the blood brain barrier and thus protects the brain and nerve cells". As I understand it, "dementia" is not strictly a "cardiovascular" disease. But if red wine improves circulation in the brain, it stands to reason that it might be beneficial to over-all brain health. Perhaps in small quantities, at least, it might be a "therapeutic" as well as pleasurable addition to ones diet. Best to OK this with ones physician, however.

There are actually some conditions for which wine is recommended by doctors. If dad’s doctor says he may have a glass of wine,
An uncle of mine was prescribed a glass of wine every evening for an eye condition.
Some wine is NOT DANGEROUS.

A friend whose dad is in a memory care facility has a gin and tonic every night, provided by the facility. It's not a problem, and it keeps his accustomed routine going.

At the senior living facility where my Dad had lived, wine was allowed. The wait-persons kept Dad's wine in the refrigerator and he would get a 4 oz glass with his supper. Dad had sundowners.

My Dad at one time had hallucinations, was seeing ants on the wall and in his food, turned out it was an Urinary Track Infection. Once he was placed on antibodics, the ant issue went away.