Does anyone have any solutions for parent w/ dementia who puts foreign objects in the toilet causing backups?

My Dad did! Rags. So many rags. So many plumbing bills. It took about a year to realize what was happening. Other issues along with this activity caused us to place in a nursing home. I have no solution for you, I’m sorry.

If your loved one is super routined with toileting and let’s say they are only placing items in the morning or evening and not all day, consider safety proofing home along with hiring an in home caregiver. They can be hired through a nonmedical home care agency that’s specializes in dementia and offers care from 1-24/7. Make sure you talk to their physician as well so they know all the aspects you are dealing with. Good luck.

We had to switch to commode only after 3 expensive plumber visits. No problems since.

Offer her a commode instead. You can purchase one at a medical supply company or find a good one at thrift stores. You could even decorate the lid and let her know it's a gift of a comfy new toilet. Offer to help her wash her hands too. ( If you place garbage sacks or recycled plastic grocery bags inside the commode it's easier clean up. No more plumbing bill. )

Supervised bathroom trips will be required because you cannot keep calling the plumber.

We had that issue when dad was first moved into a memory cottage, and we were financially responsible for the damage. He was stuffing stuff down his sink and flooding his room. We bought a motion activated faucet and hasn’t been an issue since.

how I resolved that problem was I put a garbage plastic bag around the toliet inside. use the one that you can tighten with the strings. hang it over the outside all the way around. now the bag will be above the water and tight enough not to fall into the toilet . this way any items she put into it will not go down. it took me a few times till I got it just right. it works.
you could also tell her that the toilet is broken and she has to use the porta potty. tell her that it would be easier for her as she doesn't have to walk far . she could keep it in whatever room she is in. again put a plastic bag in it to catch anything she does. if she agrees just put a hook and eye way up on the bathroom door so she cant reach it to get it open.
good luck

Is there a caretaker 24/7? Can bathroom trips be monitored or supervised?

Dealing with bathroom issues is very difficult. Since you need to be there 24/7 to monitor what is going on, clean up and prevent disasters. My brother, the saint, dealt with dad's incontinence for several months at home. Brother lived in a trailer on their property, with a camera and notifications that there was activity in the house. He then took off like a lightening bolt to help out. That made for poor sleep, since he was always "on call." And his wife was living at home without him for months.

During that time, a "commode" was used. It was a "comfort height" since dad was taller. Dad could not make it to the toilet since he was exhausted from congestive heart failure and there were steps to negotiate to the toilet. Brother emptied the commode into the regular toilet when it was used and rinsed/sanitized the commode bucket out in the laundry tub. Dad also wore disposable diaper.

Your mom should be in AL, but if she has bathroom issues, may need more intensive care of a nursing home.

Remember that if you are turning off the water the tank still holds enough for one more flush unless you empty it too.

Someone mentioned turning the water off, but the parent figured out how to turn it on again! This is worth a try and probably the easiest solution, so long as mom can't figure it out.

Signs likely won't work well, if at all. Putting a screen or some other barrier under the seat could probably be easily removed or tampered with. If you shut the water off, be sure to flush ONCE after EACH time you shut it off - generally you get one flush (found this out when we had power outages and well water - ONE flush/toilet was it until the power resumed!) If you don't do this flush after shutting the water off, she will be able to gum up the works!

Fishing inappropriate things out before flushing will be nasty, but better than having to pay someone to undo the damage done and/or cleaning up the mess that will happen if it overflows!

Just a note to say - some dementia patients can no longer read. It depends on the patient and the stage of dementia. I was shocked when it happened to my adopted mother. The nursing home said it happens more often than people realize. So signs make not work for some.

I would get so mad at my mom because she would put all sorts of things in the toilet. She was so confused. It was not her fault. She has been gone for over a year now. Wish I had been more patient and understanding.

Taking care of a parent with memory loss is difficult.

Have your handyman fit a large holed screen with loop handles in the toilet to allow urine through. You will need run water over the poop to get it down. Hopefully a bucket of water will do. With gloves you will be able to pick out the things that cannot go down. Or there are mats the ring like a doorbell you can put at the bathroom floor to go running each time she enters the bathroom. Good luck! These are quick but maybe not long term solutions but hopefully will save plumber visits!

A sensing device put in the toilet lid and toilet so when the seat is raised it will alert on your phone and you can get in place outside the door to be of assistance. I used one on a lidded waste waste can that my mother consistently used to discard soiled vinyl gloves she used while cleaning her bottom after a BM.

She needs to be supervised when she is in the bathroom.

No fun to be the one that has to make this the new normal, but a whole lot safer than the house being destroyed by an over flowing toilet.

You can also ask the plumber to quote remodeling the bathroom into a wet room. That makes clean up easier and stops water from infiltrating the structure.

Could you put a child lock on the seat? I assume she does not live alone

An inexpensive fix*might* be a urinal screen. At Amazon, check out Hospeco 01901 Health Gards Urinal Screen. The listing is for a pack of 12, so they cost $1.40 each.

I've discovered that when something happens...it's usually not the first time it has happened on the planet. I'd ask your plumber or even the manufacturer of the particular toilet if they have any ideas...or another plumber...but of course you don't want to block it so that when it is being used appropriately what needs to go in does go down the drain.
I just picked up something last night from the Safety1st company called an "Outsmart Multi-Use Lock" which got some decent reviews. It adheres with adhesive patches and the button on top is a decoy...they suggest no one seeing how it really works which is squeezing the sides to release it. Looks like a little strap. Haven't used it yet. I'm using it on the mail chute opening with a little door inside the house, and if luck is with me on a bin in the fridge.
Yours is another story which makes me realize how bad things could be....
My only other thoughts are a total lock out from the bathroom which I would be concerned about for other reasons, and a commode chair, which would also be such a drag. And if she's able to use the toilet appropriately, I can only imagine the mess if you laid a piece of thin plastic across the top beneath the seat. Oh the challenges they give us....

Place a large bin for depends and always use a hat (like to measure urine).

There came a point with MIL the bathroom in her room had to be disabled and she always required assistance.

Child proof toilet lock for the lid. Hassle for you to come open it each time but ensures she won’t be unattended and flushing what she shouldn’t

Reminds me of when my mom was living alone 400 miles away from me, the only child. Neighbor was paid to keep an eye on her and this was pre-diagnosis.

Her half bath toilet near the kitchen had an event resulting in a burst pipe and flooding downstairs in the finished basement. Turns out she kept believing she was out of toilet paper and used paper towels. She had plenty of toilet paper stockpiled in the upstairs bedroom.

I got there to witness the repair arranged by the neighbor. It required external repair under the concrete front door doorstep. The repair cost thousands.

Mom acted mildly concerned as if, "Really??? That happened because of me?"

Yep, that started the ball rolling to get the diagnosis and move her to assisted living memory care near me.

What is she putting in the toilet?
Actually it does not matter...if she is at this point she needs supervision while she is in the bathroom.
Remove all "extra" items that she could possibly flush. This includes wipes even the "flush-able" ones can clog a toilet. Only the person supervising her should have access to wipes and even extra toilet paper.

You also might want to think about replacing the toilet. If it is not a higher ADA toilet with an elongated bowl it would be worth replacing it and get one of the "newer" ones that will flush just about anything. Not for the fact that things might get accidentally flushed but for the bouts of constipation that are just not flush-able right away. (Flushing is just the first stage even though something can be flushed the pipes are only so large and a clog further down a pipe is more expensive to unclog than a clog in the toilet.)

Ellen, what type of things is she putting in there? Depends? Clothing? Things she finds in the bathroom? Things she brings in with her? I'm rooting for the forum to come up with a do-able solution for you!

My mom needed her #2's monitored for a bit, and that was just about the worst thing ever for her! Me helping her with a shower was uncomfortable, but o.k. Me looking at her poop was unthinkable.

We put a signs up: "Doctor says do not flush your poop." That didn't work. We taped the toilet handle. That didn't work. I turned off the water below the toilet so the toilet wouldn't flush. That worked for a while, but dang if mom didn't figure out how to turn the water back on. She couldn't tie a shoelace anymore but was more than able to figure out the plumbing issue.

We kept with it, though, and eventually my mom got tired of, bored with, and/or disinterested in thwarting our efforts to monitor her BMs. The combination of signs and shutting off the water is what eventually worked.

Not exactly what you asked, but I guess what I'm saying is that just when you think you've found a solution, your mom may surprise you with a workaround. All you can do is laugh and try again. ;-)

It's pricey but this is how hospitals deal with it. This device latches on to non flushables to keep them from clogging up a toilet.

https://www.drain-net.com/shop-by-product/toilet-drain-clogs/traptex/product/traptex-prevent-toilet-clogs

You can DIY something. Get a specimen collection pan for the toilet. Drill holes in it so that fluid can pass but nothing else. You'll have to clean it out whenever there's a poop or other non flushable but that should be be preferable to a clogged toilet and an overflow.

This is one of those times that I wonder why US bathrooms don't have a drain on the floor. It's common in the rest of the world. It's a great idea. It keeps a overflowing toilet, sink or tub from flooding the house. It also makes cleaning super easy. Just grab the shower head and hose the bathroom off.

Great suggestions from others about clearing out the bathroom of anything that could become a sewer clog. Additionally, I would suggest small packets of kleenex instead of rolls of toilet paper that could end up in the toilet.

1.Check her BEFORE she enters the bathroom for 'flushable' items.
2. Remove EVERYTHING from the bathroom she uses leaving only toilet paper that has no cardboard roll (you can buy it that way these days). Remove towels, packages of wipes, lotions, potions, medicine, everything in other words. So the only thing she can do in the bathroom is use the toilet. And the only thing she can flush down the toilet is her waste, the allotted toilet paper or the clothing she's wearing.
3.If she has to take a bowel movement, you'll have to accompany her into the bathroom with moistened wipes that you will figure out how to dispose of.
4. If she refuses to be accompanied into the bathroom, look into Memory Care Assisted Living for her right away. In most cases, Alzheimer's/Dementia reaches a point where the person can no longer be cared for in the home and needs a team of care givers around the clock, 24/7. Safety issues tend to also crop up, wandering at night, trying to cook in the kitchen, etc, that make the entire situation unmanageable.

I work in a Memory Care home & this morning I came in to find a very large pile of feces on the carpet in the resident hallway. Left there by a gentleman who often forgets where his toilet is and thinks it's perfectly fine to take a BM right there on the floor. Or on the upholstered chair in the living area. Again, dementia & ALzheimer's often reaches a point where in-home care is no longer feasible.

Best of luck!

If your mother is putting things into the toilet and causing horrible problems as a result, she obviously is mentally incompetent. Short of keeping her locked up with a pail in a room or attaching her to you with a rope or chain, you can't stop her. You could put a lock on the bathroom door but i assure you she will find something else to destroy. This cannot be permitted no matter what but YOU have to realize without any doubts she cannot stay in your home. It is time that you put her somewhere where the facility can monitor her. I would really explode if someone did this in my home, no matter who they are or why they are doing it. I would stop it at once. This is unacceptable and you won't be able to stop her..

My mother has been putting her depends in the toilet, causing plumbing issues much to the chagrin of her caretaker. A sign has been placed on wall next to toilet saying “Please do not flush depends” but mom still not complying and denies putting items in toilet. Looking forward to hearing suggestions.