Follow
Share

My brother is caregiver for my dad who has dementia and is living in the VA. My dad's benefits are large enough to support my disabled sister. Since my father became disabled and has been living full-time in the VA for free, it's still seems there is never enough money to do the things that make life Pleasant for my disabled sister. As caregiver and POA, I'm wondering if his financial dealings on their behalf shouldn't be transparent, to me a sibling and daughter for those in his care. It's hard to even ask for a peek into finances since he keeps no paper records at all, but files everything as PDFs in the computer. It seems the money that is coming in is far greater than what I see being spent, at the same time I realize that in this day and age, expenses are often greater than they seem. If it is generally the norm to see accountability, I might not feel wrong and asking to see how the monies are spent. At the VA my dad pays nothing, and yet his benefits equate to a normal salary. In addition my sister gets SSI or something like that and a government agency also provides a small stipend to my brother for her care

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
I'm a little confused. In your question, you state "guardian and POA" and then in your explanation, you state "caretaker and POA". Is your brother the guardian or the caretaker of your father? Is your brother the guardian or caretaker of your sister? Depending on the state you live in, court appointed guardians are required to file annual financial reports with the court which can be given to "persons of interest" (such as siblings) who are named on the guardian legal documents. May be the business office of the VA home can give you a list of potential costs that a person might be expected to pay if they plan to stay at that VA home.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Two can live more cheaply than one. When your father moved I imagine your brother had to become more diligent in keeping his money separate from your sister's, so all the little extras they may have once shared - like the phone, cable, internet... even food costs or special outings - she now has to pay on her own.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Not sure how a VA home works but I would think they take his SS and any pension he has to offset his costs. Would only be fair. I would also assume that he has no other money? Why would the government take care of him if he could afford to do so? SSI doesn't pay out a lot. Does u sister live in a facility or with brother? If in a facility they will take her SSI and she gets a small amt for personal needs. If on her own, a person receiving SSI can get help with housing, food, utilities and medical. But, usually not much left over for outings. You are lucky Dad was helping her but now he can't. As POA I kept my brothers up on how I spent my Mom's money. No surprises now she has passed. Ask brother if he is willing to sit down with you and explain finances. You may be surprised that there is not that much money.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

I'm unclear on a couple of facts. Is your brother your dad's POA? If this is the case, then he has an obligation to maintain the confidentiality of your dad's finances. At least, that's my understanding of the position of POA.

And he is your sister's court appointed guardian as well? My goodness, this guy has a lot of responsibility on him, hasn't he!?

Are you saying that more money was available for your sister before dad went into the VA home? Why do you think that there is no "share of cost" that dad has to pay the VA home?
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Your question concerning POA and guardian. Guardians have to show to the state yearly how the money is being used for an individual. A POA doesn't to the state. The only time they would have to is if someone in the family wants an accounting and when the POA isn't forth coming, the family member can sue.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter