Do you ever block calls from your parents or the person you are caring for?

My loved one is in a nursing home where I know she is well cared for. She is very demanding, however, and I feel my whole body tense up when she calls, usually to say she can't find something, such as ear buds, tweezers, etc. To make matters worse, she sleeps most of the day and wakes up late evening. I have to be up at 6:30 a.m. Still, I would feel guilty if I didn't answer. So I now have my phone on "do not disturb" setting from 9:30 p.m. until 6:45 a.m. I simply am unaware when she calls until I read my notices in the morning. If it is truly an emergency, the nursing home itself will call using an alternate number. I can finally sleep during the night.

One of the ideas I've used is to set the personalized ring tone to "silent" for those calls I don't wish to answer. It's a short term solution for a.much deeper issue.

Well, my mother rarely telephoned me because she was legally blind and got frustrated with dialing numbers. I caller HER every day for the last five years of her life, sometimes more than once a day. However, I promptly ended phone calls with her when she would talk at the same time as me. I tried the "Mother, it doesn't work when we both talk at the same time. How about if I talk now and now it's your turn." Response from her=nothing. I finally figured out why. She said "I wasn't listening to anything you said because I was thinking about what I was going to say."

The problem with "multiple-call mom" (or dad) is that they're "the boy who cried wolf". I also have someone in the family who calls the house 3x, then immediately my cell 2x, then another call to the house with no voice mail ... all to pretty much tell me their day sucked. This is how they operate each call. Really? One well-placed voice message would have gotten a return call, but now I'm thoroughly annoyed, desensitized to the severity of multiple-rings than I used to be, and lost a modicum of respect for their number when it again appears on the called-ID.

One day there will be an ultra-important call I’ll ignore, and that time there will be “real” trouble. But you can't ruin your nerves and life - it's sad, but sometimes that's the way it's going to go. Some things will just not end well, that's life.

KB, you said it exactly. Multiple calls to home, multiple calls to cell. I go to his house at the same time every Saturday but he ALWAYS calls to find out why I'm not there yet (in the car driving to his house). One time recently, he knew I had a dentist appointment yet he called my cell multiple times in the dental chair. Ringer was off but I could still see my phone lighting up over on the table. Dentist commented on it. Part of the problem for my dad is that he has been retired for so many years he doesn't remember what it's like to have a full day-a full schedule like I have. He knows I work full time but he doesn't always remember that I can't take calls. For him, a crisis in a day of his life is that the mail was late (highlight of his day) or that there is a light bulb out in his kitchen. Most of it is the 'cry wolf' stuff.

Babs75, I received the dreaded Mom phone call while I was in the dental hygenist's chair this morning!!

Not that I want anyone to feel this way, but it's nice not to feel so alone reading others say that get that same dreaded "not you again!" feeling when they see their parent calling. KBEllison said it perfectly about the "cry wolf" thing. My mom will call my work phone and leave a voicemail, then immediately call my cell phone and leave a voicemail and then texts me to call her when I get a chance. Then she proceeds to call my cell phone again 2 or 3 times. Um, how about giving me a chance to "call you back when I get a chance"?! I just told my partner the other day how there will be the day when she calls repeatedly and I'll ignore it as usual until much later where it will actually be an important or urgent call. I see her calling and immediately my eyes roll, I get annoyed and I can feel my anxiety coming on. I absolutely hate my phone now.