My husband wears a watch, but can't tell time anymore. If he looks at a wall clock, he sees a different time than what it really shows. The same thing with a calendar, but not so bad.
Time and date can be so tricky for someone with dementia. It's like there is a distorted pathway in the brain when it comes to time. What my father did was had a station that had simple numbers for that day. It had the year, the month, the day, and a digital clock. I believe it helped him stay oriented. He also had a little weather station next to it that would show the temperature outside and inside.
He used to get the newspaper every day. This helped to orient him. I'm glad that the paper didn't change its schedule until after he died. It comes only 3 times a week now. That would have been hard for him. People with dementia depend so much on familiarity. If something changes, it can make them disoriented. (I saw this yesterday when there was a strange service at the church. My mother got so disoriented that she became distraught.)
Jessie's right. As to dates, my sister bought a large calendar and developed a small ritual of crossing off each day at the end of that day. What also might be done is to get a calendar of soothing photos, such as baby animals, so that looking at the calendar also becomes a pattern of activity to help provide orientation.
Although I don't like the digital clocks, they might be of more help in orienting as to time because the instant conclusion of large and small hand placement on traditional clocks doesn't have to be made.
Tried a digital clock, calendar and a wipe off white board. Nothing helped FIL, but it did orient US! Sometimes we don't leave the house for days or have time to read the paper, so never know what day it is for sure unless we turn on TV!
Yes! Very common. My mom in law wears a watch every day and it might as well just be a bracelet. It's just a lifelong habit and she feels strange without it on her wrist. I found her a large format digital clock that not only displays the time, but the date, written as for example: "Sunday" "November 29 2015" not "11/29/2015" "Sun" It was on Amazon.com and I think I searched clocks for Alzheimer's patients. It has helped her a lot. But we understand that at some point all of this is going to be just useless, just helps for now. We also do a print off calendar every month with doc's appts, church and maybe movies we want to watch and holidays and such and she crosses off the days with our help every morning. That has been a huge help. God Bless and help you in your caregiving!
Hi yes very very typical with dementia and will drive you insane. mum used to ask me at least 15 times a day what time of day it was and was utterly fixated on it. She is on what is called Aricept in the US now and it works for her (although it doesn't for a lot of people). There is something you can buy although be warned it is expensive. It will now need to be a digital clock not an analogue and you can get talking clocks too where you just press the button on the top and its tells the time. Google clock for dementia and you will see a whole host come up and you can then choose what would be best for you.
One of my clients had three watches. She claimed she could not see the numbers. A Swatch watch with large numbers worked for about 3 months. She wore a watch because she always had. If a person has Early Onset Alz (EAOD), then more expensive digital clocks might be a waste of money. But if the disease is progressing slowly and the constant questioning drives you crazy, then buy one for your piece of mind. Sometimes, I answer the time questions repeatedly because it allows me to connect with a person. My trick is knowing that it takes 5 secs to answer a time question. It takes longer to point to a clock.
Understanding calendars and clocks takes a kind of thinking that is taken away by the disease. In fact, some of the earlier tests (which some doctors still use) is to have the person with dementia draw a clock face. The doctor can track the deterioration of the brain by the deterioration of the person's ability to draw a clock face correctly.
I'd imagine that a calendar would be much the same. The ability to organize and plan is more about how the brain works than vision (though that matters, too, of course). Some of this works into making sense of a clock or calendar.
The thread here mentions watches which brought to mind other issues: My mother and my mother-in-law both needed to wear watches because they always had. My mom could have interpreted the numbers but they were small so she didn't really use it. She had large faced clocks all over - both digital and traditional. Still - when the watch battery ran down I was called at all hours to replace that battery (immediately!).
My MIL picked her skin (common with Alzheimer's) and got it so raw under her watch that we had to take her watch away to avoid serious infection. I got her a watch on a neck chain so she had something but it never was right. None of it was about time - it was about the familiar.
Much of what we do as caregivers is to try to provide a sense of calm, which often means keeping things as familiar as possible. So, whether or not a watch can be read isn't always the point.
My husband is 76 and has vascular dementia. I need to know the time etc.. But he doesn't and doesn't care. He still wears his watch too. I got him a big clock but I had to get a silent one because he hated the ticking. What bugs me is that when he gets up at 4 am and I tell him it's 5 hours until breakfast he has no clue what that really means. The only thing he is aware of is Sunday breakfast. "It must be Sunday because we have a good breakfast!" I do tell him every morning what day it is and what the plans for the day are.
One of the first things my father lost was the desire to know what time it was. He stopped wearing a watch. He doesn't know what day or time it is most of the time. Strangely, one of the few things he does is get the mail, and he will wake up every 30 minutes or so after lunch to look at the clock to see if 3 pm is approaching when he'll walk up to get the mail. I don't know how long that will last now as he's almost falling down now.
My sister who is 71 has Alzheimers & at the mental health centre that is one test they do. Draw a clock with numbers on it & then they have to put a time on it drawing the small hand & the big hand. & placing time given her coordination is off & drawing a clock is like a four year old might draw - My sister wears her watch daily but can't tell the time.I have her in a home now & she also carries a pocket book around that she reads -- but she really can't read either.She is happy & conteted & that is what counts.She is with people & they do crafts & play games.Some days are better then others. She is where she needs to be.
Telling what time it is and what day of the week it is has been a challenge for both my parents. For my dad, who is also legally blind, the atomic talking watch has been extremely useful. It cost $59, and automatically changes for daylight savings, which avoids confusion for him with that issue. My mother has trouble with the day of the week, and she found an analog clock in a catalog with a large face that also has a hand for the day of the week. The face and the hands are large enough that my dad can tell what day it is. Each year I print out a calendar for my mother with large numbers and important dates that I know she wants to remember (birthdays, anniversaries). She crosses off each day before she goes to bed.
Sassy, thanks for the reminder that drawing a clock is one of the mini tests for cognitive decline. I recall my friend telling me how devastated she was when her mother could not even begin to make a clock face, it really hammered home to her how insidious the beginning stages of dementia can be.
Yes, I'm finding this is a common problem. Although I'm very aware of my mom's mental decline, the drawing of a clock test was really an 'in your face' moment from just 9 months ago. A Dr. once explained to me the following, which I find in my mom's case to be very true: there are separate pathways - one for space, time, dates, etc and the other for language. My mom still recognizes all of us, and knows what things are called, this is a pen, table, etc. However, the area of the brain with the time and dates is very impaired. She thinks my brothers in their 50s are teenagers, and my brother in his 60s is in his 20s. The concept of time is completely off. However she would constantly ask what the day of the week was. This was my fix which works for us, and hopefully for you as well. I printed 7 separate sheets of paper saying - TODAY IS....Monday, today is...Tues, etc and every day we switch it and she refers to it often. It's big, clear and simple and in a way empowers her since she doesn't have to ask anymore. I find less is better, so instead of an actual calendar, I suggest perhaps following the same format and create a simple one that only shows today's date instead of having to recognize it.
youtu.be/LL_Gq7Shc-Y?list=PLgXCxOg-CBEtEfrlT8Eu66fMllm1r4TRS Check it out....enlightening for those of us who do not suffer the disease but are, or were caregivers. God watch over all of us.
I find this rather odd because my surrogate dad actually had dementia but he was very sharp in this area. I think from all of our experiences here, we will find that dementia affects people differently. My surrogate dad was very sharp in some areas to the point where he seemed actually pretty normal during the day. However, I started noticing a slight change in the evening, and worsened as the night progressed. It wasn't until I realized it was sundowners that something was wrong. At the time I had absolutely no experience whatsoever at recognizing dementia or even Alzheimer's. When you have no past experience, this kind of thing can actually creep up on unsuspecting people who really don't know what to look for in order to spot the problem. It wasn't until I was in contact with the right people before I started realizing what was happening with dad. Since I wasn't a blood relative, there was very little I could even do because he has no blood family. Because dad seemed so normal much of the time, this made it much harder to spot a problem. All I can say from experience in my own experience with dad is that not everyone with dementia has problems with clocks or calendars, he didn't.
The whole problem with dementia is that we don't know what part of the brain the dementia will strike at. At thats the bit that is so frustrating. You don't know whether they are just being their difficult selves or whether its the dementia especially if they have always been difficult to begin with.
As a caregiver and daughter of a mother who has a dependency personality disorder and was always narcissistic, it is now impossible for me to tell where one of those facets ends and where dementia takes over. You think you have it sussed then they do something totally out of whack. She was always stroppy if she didn't get her own way. Is she worse because thats a gradual thing and it was getting worse for years...or did she always have dementia coming on and that has made her worse? Is she worse because the dementia has taken away her ability to control her emotions, or is she just frustrated too?
Answer I DONT BLOODY KNOW - I think its a mixture of all of them, any of which can appear at any time
I had a red numbered digital clock for Mom. Numbers we not quiter an inch tall. In the dark red tends to blur and she couldn't read them. Daughter got her yellow colored numbers somewhat bigger. Still some problem reading all the numbers but usually can tell its around something. Mom doesn't understand five, 10, 15, ect minutes after. Or quarter, half so on. We were told to use calenders and newspapers to help her understand what day it is. No, doesn't work but I continue to do it.
Hello! My mother has a very difficult time with the calendar. We have a big calendar on her dining room table that we write when my brother will be there next. Not too long ago she called my cell phone screaming and asking where the h___ was I! I was suppose to be at her house! I said Mom I am coming on the 22nd today is the 13th. She said I was wrong and I must have a different calendar than she does. She ended up slamming the phone down saying she was very upset and she was going to go for a walk. I called later and she did not remember the conversation or that we had even talked that day.
Same with my mom! She is getting worse. Especially if we have an appointment or a plan to do something. She would become very confused and upset so I stopped telling her anything in advance. Otherwise, she'd get up and dressed at 6am and start pacing around.
Same with my Mom. I tell her nothing in advance. For the same reason she gets up really early. If u tell her a friend is visiting at a certain time, she asks constantly where her company is coming. So, I tell her when the friend gets here. Same with appts. No reason she needs to know. Their time and days just run into each other. I wouldn't tell her when ur coming exactly.
When my mom lived with us, she absolutely had to get up at 5:45 on the dot every day of the week. That meant I was up at 5:30 every day too with no respite for months. She refused any in-home help and I had no sibling help and a child of 14 at the time. That was one of the contributing straws that brought about her AL placement. I was exhausted!
Now that she's been in AL for over four years her waking time is now 1:30 a.m. It went from 5:45 to 4:30 to 3:30, you get the gist, over time. She refuses to see a doctor and would never take a dementia test. Yes, she is a narcissist who likes tight control over everything including bodily functions and is whipped into a frenzy when things don't "come out" on her schedule.
Sorry I have no suggestions for you. :( Just had to rant as I know how crazy-making these situations can be.
Lllamalover47, I'm just thankful that she's been in AL as all these time changes have taken place. I would've been 6 feet under myself if she would've stayed with us all these years. Fresh folks on eight hour shifts can handle that madness, plus mom is in a wheelchair now. No way I can do transfers as I'm not that young myself even though she's 80 some pounds.
This site has been a Godsend to me as far as letting go of the guilt. Sometimes situations are just out of our league no matter how much we want to take care of our elders be it out of love or guilt.
I'm glad I realized that before my 'calendar' ran out. It is soooo difficult. It still is hard, just in a different way.
Private1There is no one person with dementia that has the same symptoms --there is different stages when you have Alzheimers With my sister she could tell you something one day & then tell you she did not tell you that.Then there is the story she would tell people about the man looking in her windows to him trying to get in to the work shop. Later the same story but she called the cops.None of it true- but in her mind it was very true! My sister could even lie to me & think nothing of it- I had to prove she was driving her car when she said she had not.We finally sold her car .She had a notice that her licence was taken away -- but she was keeping her license anyway!I would keep a notebook handy so I could recall different epassotes . I would go to her Dr appointment with her so that the Dr & I could compare notes. My sister to this day can not remember falling & breaking her hip years ago. A very sad disease. You can't do it alone - get the Alzheimers association to help and any other organization also.Don't wait until you are burned out to get help ,there is a waiting list to have a loved one placed !! Hope this helps.
He used to get the newspaper every day. This helped to orient him. I'm glad that the paper didn't change its schedule until after he died. It comes only 3 times a week now. That would have been hard for him. People with dementia depend so much on familiarity. If something changes, it can make them disoriented. (I saw this yesterday when there was a strange service at the church. My mother got so disoriented that she became distraught.)
Although I don't like the digital clocks, they might be of more help in orienting as to time because the instant conclusion of large and small hand placement on traditional clocks doesn't have to be made.
If a person has Early Onset Alz (EAOD), then more expensive digital clocks might be a waste of money. But if the disease is progressing slowly and the constant questioning drives you crazy, then buy one for your piece of mind.
Sometimes, I answer the time questions repeatedly because it allows me to connect with a person. My trick is knowing that it takes 5 secs to answer a time question. It takes longer to point to a clock.
I'd imagine that a calendar would be much the same. The ability to organize and plan is more about how the brain works than vision (though that matters, too, of course). Some of this works into making sense of a clock or calendar.
The thread here mentions watches which brought to mind other issues:
My mother and my mother-in-law both needed to wear watches because they always had. My mom could have interpreted the numbers but they were small so she didn't really use it. She had large faced clocks all over - both digital and traditional. Still - when the watch battery ran down I was called at all hours to replace that battery (immediately!).
My MIL picked her skin (common with Alzheimer's) and got it so raw under her watch that we had to take her watch away to avoid serious infection. I got her a watch on a neck chain so she had something but it never was right. None of it was about time - it was about the familiar.
Much of what we do as caregivers is to try to provide a sense of calm, which often means keeping things as familiar as possible. So, whether or not a watch can be read isn't always the point.
Take care,
Carol
What bugs me is that when he gets up at 4 am and I tell him it's 5 hours until breakfast he has no clue what that really means. The only thing he is aware of is Sunday breakfast. "It must be Sunday because we have a good breakfast!"
I do tell him every morning what day it is and what the plans for the day are.
Although I'm very aware of my mom's mental decline, the drawing of a clock test was really an 'in your face' moment from just 9 months ago. A Dr. once explained to me the following, which I find in my mom's case to be very true:
there are separate pathways - one for space, time, dates, etc and the other for language. My mom still recognizes all of us, and knows what things are called, this is a pen, table, etc. However, the area of the brain with the time and dates is very impaired. She thinks my brothers in their 50s are teenagers, and my brother in his 60s is in his 20s. The concept of time is completely off. However she would constantly ask what the day of the week was. This was my fix which works for us, and hopefully for you as well. I printed 7 separate sheets of paper saying - TODAY IS....Monday, today is...Tues, etc and every day we switch it and she refers to it often. It's big, clear and simple and in a way empowers her since she doesn't have to ask anymore. I find less is better, so instead of an actual calendar, I suggest perhaps following the same format and create a simple one that only shows today's date instead of having to recognize it.
Check it out....enlightening for those of us who do not suffer the disease but are, or were caregivers.
God watch over all of us.
As a caregiver and daughter of a mother who has a dependency personality disorder and was always narcissistic, it is now impossible for me to tell where one of those facets ends and where dementia takes over. You think you have it sussed then they do something totally out of whack. She was always stroppy if she didn't get her own way. Is she worse because thats a gradual thing and it was getting worse for years...or did she always have dementia coming on and that has made her worse? Is she worse because the dementia has taken away her ability to control her emotions, or is she just frustrated too?
Answer I DONT BLOODY KNOW - I think its a mixture of all of them, any of which can appear at any time
Now that she's been in AL for over four years her waking time is now 1:30 a.m. It went from 5:45 to 4:30 to 3:30, you get the gist, over time. She refuses to see a doctor and would never take a dementia test. Yes, she is a narcissist who likes tight control over everything including bodily functions and is whipped into a frenzy when things don't "come out" on her schedule.
Sorry I have no suggestions for you. :( Just had to rant as I know how crazy-making these situations can be.
This site has been a Godsend to me as far as letting go of the guilt. Sometimes situations are just out of our league no matter how much we want to take care of our elders be it out of love or guilt.
I'm glad I realized that before my 'calendar' ran out. It is soooo difficult. It still is hard, just in a different way.
I would go to her Dr appointment with her so that the Dr & I could compare notes.
My sister to this day can not remember falling & breaking her hip years ago.
A very sad disease. You can't do it alone - get the Alzheimers association to help and any other organization also.Don't wait until you are burned out to get help ,there is a waiting list to have a loved one placed !! Hope this helps.