Is anyone dealing with second generation parent whose whole family had dementia/Alzheimer's ? Not just Italian but that is what I have been dealt with. Oh I need some help please. I lost Grandma who was so mean, Grandpa (who is just like my Dad) three Aunts and they all blamed the devil for this!? Dad who is in rehab is still saying it is not him being mean to other people, but the evil one 😖 He had lost a spot at AL because of it
Peace, love and joy❤️
I also know that Italians when perfectly well, young and healthy, can have a very strong personality and specific beliefs related to their culture, now mix that with illness, specially dementia, and I can only imagine what you are going through.
Like others recommended, get your dad diagnosed and appropriately medicated. I know the correct medication will help him -and you- a great deal. Once dementia starts to be dealt with you’ll see how his concern about what or who is causing his extreme temperament will fall really low in the list of concerns. Also, try to get informed about dementia, watch Teepa’s videos on YouTube, they are very enlightening.
Keep calmed and don’t let your dad’s situation take away your center and your common sense.
Best of luck!
Where I am, we also have a large number of elderly Italian migrants, often originally from poor families in southern Italy. Before they migrated, not too many people survived into old age. Those that did often owned the family home and had to be flattered and obeyed. That is still the expectation of many of the ‘meanies’. You have a difficult row to hoe, and the only help I can think of is ‘don’t take your guns to town’!
The AL may feel that they can not provide the level of care he needs. He may need to be in a nursing home in a Memory Care Unit.
Now, you know “The Devil” is not responsible for any of your relatives acting the way they do (did). It is a mental disease and many people have it. It does not distinguish between Italian, Polish, Russian, French, American, etc There is treatment for it.
Get your father to a doctor and have him evaluated and treated for It and ask them to suggest what kind of facility he needs.