Dealing with narcissistic mother?

Update!
The movers called and will be here tomorrow!!
Praise the Lord and pass the potatoes!!😁

You can rent furniture, my brother & I did that for my mother when she went into AL, took over 4 weeks for most of her furniture to arrive and then several pieces were missing, another 3 weeks later, they arrived damaged.

If you let her continue to manipulate you, things will never get better. Just tell her what you are going to do, and do it. My mother said the same thing, we went ahead and now she is in AL and happy!

They pull every card out of the hat to get what they want. Be strong and good luck,

It sounds as though you actually listen to what she says, so could you explain why you’re doing that? The safest way (for yourself) to manage someone who is doing what your mother is doing, is to remind yourself when involved in any discussion that she isn’t doing anything but “wording”.

When someone is wording they don’t need you to participate, and may not even expect interaction. Smile, nod, frown, and ignore.

The “crying” thing? You have described it as “uncontrollable”. Then stop wasting YOUR energy looking for a way to control it. If that’s what she’s choosing as a substitute for wording, write on a 3 X 5 card “We can talk when you stop crying”, hand it to her, AND LEAVE THE ROOM.

ARE you “trying to get rid of her”? I certainly would be. I would want her to be SAFE, monitored for self care and schedules, respected for who and what she is, and away from ME.

Presumably you’ve lived a healthy, independent life before she re-entered your life space. Through the stress and the changed burden of having responsibility for her, you’ve begun listening to comments that come from her damaged perception of you and your shared relationship.

Paying attention to her wording is costing YOU and not benefiting her. You can stop what you’re doing, and she really can’t stop what she’s doing.

So for survival, stop.

Can you hire a sitter for awhile and take a break? Don’t allow her to lose sleep. The lack of sleep is only going to make it worse.

Have you considered a geriatric psychiatrist visit for her? Is she depressed?