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How do you have a job and are home all day?
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Instead of a monthly budget, I'd give him a weekly amount. He has no concept of budgets or time, so to me, a month is too long a time. A week is a much easier concept to understand and maintain. Then if he runs out, he has a shorter time to wait until he can get more spending cash.

And you can be social without breaking the bank. He can still go and have something cheaper on the menu (I'll just have an appetizer - I'm watching my weight)...so he doesn't have to spend so much to be social. Or soft drinks instead of wine or a cocktail.

You're being a soft touch, not harsh at all! So set some limits with dad and stick to them. Good luck!
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This is a hard one. How old is your dad? Does he have dementia? Is he computer literate? When my mom had a hard time with finances; that was one of the first signs that she had dementia. Since this has been a continual problem - I don't see anything getting better.

I would think someone in the family should have POA and manage his finances, he obviously cannot do it any more. You could do on-line banking so he can see what is going on, but I wouldn't give him the password. I would just tell him, that he can't afford to over spend any more. He needs to start saving his money, because he may need it. What if his health fails and you can no longer care for him.

Sorry, about this but you will just have to take charge - its never easy. Having a family meeting with your other siblings and your father may be helpful.
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It sounds as if you've been a pretty soft touch for quite a while. Certainly setting boundaries will seem harsh to both you and to him. But it needs to be done. After a life of lavish living, anything less will seem like deprivation.
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Tgengine, I don't recall - can you control his finances? Are you proxy under a DPOA so that you could take over his accounts and institute a budget? Is anyone presenting him with a list of his expenditures so that he can see for himself his spending is out of control?

I dont' at all think you're being harsh. If he runs out of money, he'll probably expect you to pitch in.
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So I come home this AM after being out on multiple calls and Dad meets me in the driveway "I'm driving to this city for lunch for oysters"...... OK, it is two hours one way, plus the weekend lots of traffic of which I advised him. It is the thing with him, he is bored and he is fixated with oysters. Plus he is spending money like crazy this month. He will soon run out of cash. I have been trying to tell him but he wont eat leftovers unless it is "desert".... Now if we go out with friends he has to go out to eat too. Or like the other night he fry's corn fritters in the kitchen, I have asked repeatedly not to fry in the house. I am not trying to deny him but I have a job, I have money and I am home all day and need my own time out! He does not realize how much he is spending. So at the end of the month when he is out of cash I will have to say I am too.... It is not going to be a nice conversation but now that he is more social it is dinners and lunches out plus gas etc..... Am I the tough one now? Am I being too harsh?
I a hinting at getting him to visit my sister but I have my doubts he will do that.
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It's like you are between a rock and hard place... you want your Dad to go out and have some fun, but in the mean time he's racking up costs like the national debt.

Sounds like Dad isn't going to save for those "rainy days"... maybe stress to Dad that down the road if he needs a higher level of care, it could cost him $5k a month, so he better start saving. Or Dad might think, might as well party now in case there is no tomorrow.... [sigh].

If Dad is going to act like a kid who has no concept of money, then he needs to be treated like a kid. Time to take away the credit cards, checkbooks, saving account books, and give Dad an allowance. No more ATM machines.

That allowance will cover everything for the month.... show him a budget [if he is willing to listen and not have his eyes glaze over]. Therefore if he needs car repairs, then he will need to give up something else to help pay for it. No more you or other relatives bailing him out.
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Oh boy.

I think you know, don't you, that your father doesn't have a handle on spending. He can keep it up for a while to impress you with how responsible he's being, but as soon as he thinks you're not watching he'll be paying his 1. entertainment 2. car expenses and 3. oh dear not enough for insurance...

You're looking at a tough love scenario, I'm very much afraid: you have this much money this week/month. Run out? Too bad.

Get your sister on board and thrash out a good, structured budget for him that you both agree on, because it's going to be miserable enough without added vagueness or anybody "cheating"; but hey. Why the heck should you make all the sacrifices, just to perpetuate his terrible lifelong spending habit?

And who's he treating, by the way? Maybe remind him that real friends don't need to be impressed.
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