smcbeth1....you can't get your husband sober...but you will learn everything you need to know about living with an aloholic and how to cope with the problems. alanon...all these people have first hand experience. also...you can go to several different meetings in your area...you might feel more comfortable in one vs another. BUT, you will hear what you need to hear...you will find it to be an enourmous comfort in your life! good luck
AA, Counseling, etc., CAN help get out of an alcoholic rut, IF the person themselves Wants that, and are willing to keep doing the work to achieve keeping off ETOH. Our society has spent terrible amounts of resources trying, often in the wrong ways, to make it go away, and failed. I've witnessed family members stuck in it, destroying themselves, repeatedly making excuses. The collateral damages can be epic. Behaviors indigenous to chronically using a substance to alter one's mind, to numb-out pain of body and mind, and even pain of Spirit, are cries for help, letting society know that they did not get their needs met, got poorly parented, got injured along the path of their lives. Even if subsequent generations manage to avoid chronic or episodic alcohol use, the behaviors keep turning up for generations to come. I've managed to avoid ETOH use; it was clear it was ruining otherwise amazing people I loved. Some siblings managed to avoid it, too. But, only because we experienced what it does to those we love, and chose to avoid that... But none of us could entirely avoid the messed-up behaviors that come along with it. It goes back generations, and that collateral damage spreads forward, too. Those who DO manage to break those cycles, have done something really important. We look openly at the issue, we SEE that elephant in the room, and we speak out about it, hoping to light a better path for others. THIS is where those cycles can be interrupted. Choose better paths, then keep picking yourself up daily; use beneficial self-talk and constructive goal-setting to achieve useful, higher goals than those before you. If those around you cannot deal with you speaking of that elephant in the room, find another room, and leave them their elephants. Their elephants do not have to be yours. That applies to ANY of those things, be it substance abuse, other abuses, people who repeatedly sabotage you, whatever. YOU have a right to create the path you want to follow....make it a really good one! Try to do that determination when you are a young adult, instead of waiting until you are old....but even if you missed decades, you can still choose to make whatever good changes, forge a better path, and make your life better.
First a trip to the doctors. change in behavior can be caused by health problems. Then there is controlled drinking. where a person, gives them a rationed amount of booze. One problem while drinking people forget how much they have had, and go way to far.A tell tale sign is that there mood changes, if it goes from bad to worse, then getting sober might be the only way. Remember one shoe does not fit all sizes.
AA says: "There is a solution." (not a cure). It is a daily reprieve from drinking g based on our spiritual condition. We never graduate. We don't really give anything up...Among the happiest people on earth are recovering alcholics in AA.
Our society has spent terrible amounts of resources trying, often in the wrong ways, to make it go away, and failed. I've witnessed family members stuck in it, destroying themselves, repeatedly making excuses. The collateral damages can be epic.
Behaviors indigenous to chronically using a substance to alter one's mind, to numb-out pain of body and mind, and even pain of Spirit, are cries for help, letting society know that they did not get their needs met, got poorly parented, got injured along the path of their lives. Even if subsequent generations manage to avoid chronic or episodic alcohol use, the behaviors keep turning up for generations to come.
I've managed to avoid ETOH use; it was clear it was ruining otherwise amazing people I loved. Some siblings managed to avoid it, too. But, only because we experienced what it does to those we love, and chose to avoid that...
But none of us could entirely avoid the messed-up behaviors that come along with it. It goes back generations, and that collateral damage spreads forward, too.
Those who DO manage to break those cycles, have done something really important. We look openly at the issue, we SEE that elephant in the room, and we speak out about it, hoping to light a better path for others.
THIS is where those cycles can be interrupted.
Choose better paths, then keep picking yourself up daily; use beneficial self-talk and constructive goal-setting to achieve useful, higher goals than those before you. If those around you cannot deal with you speaking of that elephant in the room, find another room, and leave them their elephants. Their elephants do not have to be yours. That applies to ANY of those things, be it substance abuse, other abuses, people who repeatedly sabotage you, whatever.
YOU have a right to create the path you want to follow....make it a really good one!
Try to do that determination when you are a young adult, instead of waiting until you are old....but even if you missed decades, you can still choose to make whatever good changes, forge a better path, and make your life better.
Grace + Peace.
Bob