Cremation?

I am a believer in therapeutic fibbing. Religious beliefs are hard to discuss rationally and some people have no room in theirs for your preference. The chances are good that you will outlive your Dad, so just don't argue the point with Dad (unless he takes you to go purchase a burial plot:) My husband's parents have very specific beliefs on how we should live, what church to attend, what services are "good ones" etc. They can believe anything they want to, no skin off my nose. I just sidestep the long winded arguments because you cannot win the discussion. I tell them to let me know what they want done, and how to pay for it, and that redirects off my business quickly. Good luck.

People, especially old folks, are so used to the classic funerals, casket, flowers, visitation, service and graveside service, rent the overpriced limo............

Personally Im sick of all that crap, it's just an expensive ordeal. I understand there are religions that require this or that, so be it. But for me, cremation is just fine. Don't even need a fancy urn. An old wine bottle would do.

I'm a Christian but hadn't heard that one before, wow. As I read scripture God doesn't need and won't be using your dead, decayed body since you'll be getting a new glorified one so cremation has no bearing on that. By that logic if someone died in a fire they wouldn't either. In fact, at our church years ago one of our beloved members died and wanted cremation. I have to say it was one of the most beautiful and relaxed services I've ever attended. Sounds strange maybe, but truly it was though we were sad. And I could see it was much easier on the family to endure. I suspect dad just doesn't want you to do it, but the evidence doesn't support it.

After attending yet another funeral of a personal client, when it was over, I told the people I was with to please please not put my family and friends thru that..... have me cremated , put me in an old mayonnaise jar and throw me off the first bridge you come to..... nooooo funeral for me.... and scripturaly, I will take my chances..

No funeral for me either! Cremation all the way. And throw those ashes anywhere...my dad was cremated and my mom will be too. I'm sure my brother has chosen that option too. I think some people are a little too wrapped up in what is left once their gone (fancy casket, service, big floral arrangements). I want none of that, because I know in the overall scheme of things, it means nothing. Live well while you're alive and that's enough for me.

I agree with many posts here. If it helps with your situation, I think you can be cremated and then the ashes buried in the cemetery. I think I've read about that on this site. Perhaps some can chime in on that.

Some seniors believe that cremation is against the Bible. My father got so upset when one of his distant cousins was cremated, that he almost addressed the family about it. lol We explained to daddy that the man had requested cremation. Daddy could hardly accept it and thought the man must have lost his mind by doing this.

So, we don't discuss it with daddy. He and mother have places in an old town cemetery for most of our immediate family. I'm not sure where the spouses and grandkids will go though.

I thought I wanted cremation, until I visited the cemetery where most of our family is buried. Maybe I do want a little stone that marks that I was here. It's a peaceful place and across the street from the hospital I was born in. Maybe it's fitting. I don't need an expensive service, flowers, etc. Just direct burial and a meal with the family if fine.

You can put your wishes for cremation in your Will and make it known to those who are your Healthcare POA.

I want to be cremated. I hope, though, that there will people left behind who will want to mark my passing and will have a memorial service to do so.

My parents, like many in their generation, had only ever attended funerals. Dad didn't want any part of that, and wanted to be cremated. We honored that wish, and we also honored the wish not to have a "funeral" but, hey Dad, we are in charge now and this is for us. We had a lovely memorial service. My mother said that is exactly what she wants when her time comes.

Do not argue with your Dad about this issue. Just make sure you know what he wants and that he knows that you know.

Cremains can certainly be buried in a family plot.

My father was creamated, then several months later we had a graveside service. It was lovely and he has a headstone ( already made up for him and mom, just needed dates). A minister did the service, and it was all very nice. This is what mom wants also.

My mother cremated my father and had his ashes scattered in the Guadalupe River which winds down to the Gulf of Mexico. Mother died in June, and I followed her wishes to a T. The majority of her ashes were put into a new garden area in the backyard of our home. One tiny bag was placed in the Red River which also flows into the Gulf of Mexico to meet up with my father's ashes. The second tiny bag was scattered on the Las Vegas Strip where she will have a view of the whole strip.

We had a Celebration of Life at Outback Steakhouse. It was a wonderful gathering for my children, grandchildren, husband's family, and friends a month after she passed.

This is not something that the Catholic Church would approve, but mother received Last Rites before she died. That is all that is required. She could not afford to have a full-blown funeral, did not want one, and we did not even have enough pall bearers. I talked to my oldest cousin in Chicago, and she told me not to have any viewing, mass, or anything else. My oldest daughter, son-in-law, and I came to the same conclusion. Cost of cremation and dinner came to less than $2,000.

Follow your heart.

a good book to read about it is called : Smoke Gets In your Eyes by Caitlin Doughty. It is a little graphic though

Just too much pomp and circumstance (along with a lot of $$$$) for a funeral and expensive caskets. A nice little clay strawberry pot to be set out in the garden is fine with me.

After going through the whole nine yards with my mother and sister, I was still in sticker shock from the astounding costs, as well as the trauma to the family of having to go through a few or less days of viewing, then the ordeal of the funeral. It's completely exhausting, emotionally and physically.

I want my friends and family to remember me before I reach the stage of metamorphosing into a peony or rose or even a lovely hydrangea.

There are so many ways to honor the dead and allow the living remembrance and closure without the expense and the ordeal of a standard funeral. It can be done to suit any religion or lack thereof. There are a couple of other threads on the forum that give detailed examples.

The classic American way of death and funerals has been developed over the years into a very profitable industry. I have respect for the folks in the industry. They serve a need in our society but they can make you feel ever so small and cheap if you don't go along with the upgrades suggested.

I went through this process twice in the last five years when my sister and then my brother died. My Dad was in the early stages of dementia and thankfully turned things over to my mother and me. Mom was grief stricken to the point of exhaustion. The funeral home people were very helpful in many ways and pleasant to deal with but they took full advantage of Moms grief to try and sell her every service and geegaw they had.

As my nephew was helping mom into the casket showroom I pulled the director lady aside and had a serious chat. She got the message and directed moms attention to the $5000 casket instead of the $15000 one. It is absolutely insane. For a modest funeral, grave site, opening and closing charges, visitation, and graveside service it still came in around 15 K. If I had not been there I can't imagine how much money my poor mother would have signed over.

Thank you all for sharing. That helps. I had read and read trying to find the verse he was referring too, and I never did come up with one phrased exactly "from the grave", and that was his point of contention. I thought about asking at that point, but never did, figured no point in arguing, I'd lose, he's a Minister. I let it go, left it undecided, he's pointed out plots by my grandparents that are for sale, wanted me to look, said he'll buy, but still I've left it go.

New, thanks for letting us know. I married to a minister too! I did PM you also.

I'm a Christian and I believe cremation is totally fine! Ashes to ashes, ye shall return. As my husband likes to say, 'the Creator of the universe can certainly put you back together!' You don't need an official grave to rise from the dead when the trump sounds.

My mom was cremated and then we held a small memorial for her at home. Now she resides on the top of a beautiful cabinet. I was planning on cremation also but am also exploring leaving my body to science. Nothing fancy for me!