COVID protection for seniors who live alone?

My Mother is 95 and has been in the hospital since last Thursday night. I brought her home tonight. She has cellulitis which is redness and swelling in her legs and feet. She needed IV antibiotics since it was a bacterial infection. With this corona virus she doesn’t want anyone in the house and nursing homes aren’t letting any visitors in. Now isn’t the time for her to go to a nursing home. I don’t even know if they would take her because of the corona virus. So she lives alone. I bring her groceries and the mail and take out the garbage. I have to go to her house more often from now on to soak her feet. The doctor told me she needs her feet soaked every night. I brought her home and soaked her feet. Everything went well.

My dad is 88 years old and lives alone since my mom passed July 2018. I live about 80 miles from him. The little social life he was just starting to develop since my mom passed has all come to a halt with the coronavirus. Last I visited him was for two nights on 3/15 and 3/16. I call him every day and we talk for 30-45 minutes. He grocery shops with gloves but does not wipe down groceries.
I know he is lonely and would really like company. My husband and I are both very careful when shopping, practice social distancing and are working at home. The one minor in our house has not been anywhere since school let out 3/13/2020.
I would greatly appreciate input on this. I don't want to bring danger to my dad's safety but I also want to be company for him and I really do miss him. If i do visit i would want to stay one night due to the distance/travel.

If I were 91 or above, I would rather risk getting virus from my family, who knows what to do to lessen the danger of passing on the virus. My personal thoughts, once a week, perhaps person to person... rather than not seeing anyone.. Plus the physical distancing of 6 feet... I would risk it..
Although I am against someone 91 and older living alone. Had a neighbor whose wife passed away.. I would take over a cup of coffee and a bagel with cream cheese, knock on the door in the morning just to make sure I got a knock back... Yup,,it was concerning for me. Just wanted to make sure he had something to eat in the AM and he was okay... I always got a knock back until his sister finally came down and got him... FINALLY....

Hi Caringfordaddy, I was looking for this topic to hit the fan. I am also in a very similar situation caring for my elderly Mom who lives in her home less than 8 miles from me. She has been isolating at home for years, but with Covid-19, I am being super careful when I visit. Our town is in lockdown, but I’m able to get to her, bring food/necessities and visit. I used to give her a hug before I leave, but we are both conscious of being distant now. My issue is that my husband is still essential and goes to work. He comes home and uses good hygiene measures, plus, my mom receives meals on wheels deliveries. I pray that she stays safe. It’s been really tough trying to avoid packages or shopping in stores. My go to grocery store for curbside pickup has struggled with staff so I’m trying to weigh options between taking her takeout meals vs meals I can prepare at home and take to her. I haven’t been to a grocery store in weeks now, opting to get takeout or having my husband pick things up, but I worry about his health as well as mine. Stay strong in faith. God Bless!

Oh, my goodness!
Let's be realistic.
Now's the time to make phone calls - a couple of times a day. Save things up to talk about - how you planted mini daffodils in the neighbor's lawn as a little surprise, the new recipes you're trying with the groceries you have at hand, whatever!!!
Had a good chat tonight with my brother (the one who NEVER calls her- too sensitive, I think) suggesting that letters/pictures from his kids would be soooo helpful. That's something he can do at arms length, (despite how PO'd I am with him.) She's in assisted living, a couple of blocks from the latest outbreak in care facilities. It's only a matter of time.

My sense is to make her happy for now.

Perhaps you can call him at least twice a day to check in with him. Maybe even bring him groceries that he needs a leave the outside his .door

My mother is 88 years old and has the first stages of dementia. I am visiting her everyday but keeping my distance. She is close enough that I walk to her house. I bring her meals because she doesn't cook anymore. I had a care giver but had to let her go for the time being due to the virus. I am the only one that is allowed in her house. My brother was just recently trying to put her into a home. Thank goodness I was against that. I would probably have to visit her through a window. I would feel terrible if I would get the virus and pass it on to her, but I don't have any options. Do you think it's safe to help her with her showers? She is on a walker and very unstable. I don't want her to fall and then we take a trip to the hospital. I take both her and my temperatures every day.

Thank you for sharing this. It is very helpful. Only one time have I heard anyone talk about diarrhea. Dr. Sanjay Gupta.
Have you seen patients with diarrhea? I wonder why no one is talking about it.

I live in CA. Been in Stay At Home mode for awhile now. I am going to visit my dad who is a young 79. But, I will take all the precautions I can. The way I see it is if something were to happen I would hate for him to be by himself. I've weighed the pros & cons. Being alone just isn't how I'm going to deal with it.

I live with my 92yr MIL and 68 BIL who is blind with autism so I am being diligent.

Do what you feel is best for your situation.

Best to all,

Kim

Caringfordaddy: I'll assume that your dad does NOT leave the house? When you visit, use PPE measures.

I would continue to see him and just be really careful. Mask up to catch a cough or sneeze. Any mask will do for that purpose. Maybe even designate 'your chair' in his home for you to sit in and that he agrees to stay away from even after you've left.

Total isolation is too tough. It may be months before it's anywhere near safe for frail people to be out and about. In fact, there may be no return to 'normal' for them for a very, very long time and, at 91, at some point, he may start asking himself if the reward is worth the risk. The quality of days vs the quantity.

It is so stressful that we're having to think in these ways.

same situation . I am my mother's only social contact beyond her carers. At 93 I think she would rather see me than continue in isolation for months. If I stay away who knows when or if I will see her again . I no longer kiss her and maintain a distance during our visit. It's a very tough decision .

my mom is in her own home downstairs with sister, bil and neice upstairs; she really does not understand why she is not at my house except that my sister is on "spring break" (she is a teacher); they provide her meals and check on her often, no way (she is 94) she would be left totally alone; family planning a social distancing part on friday and sister will be there with her and the computer so she gets to see all the extended family

Do you have someone near to him that do the 'talking through the window' thing so he actually sees and talks to someone every day. Maybe pay a kid that is out of school right now to go talk to him like that.
It is a risk for you to visit. Does he understand what is going on? Maybe you could go there and meet him outdoors to talk for a while - lawn chairs, patio, etc.

As long as your state does not have a stay at home order, aI would contiinue to visit him using social distancing and good hand hygeine as long as you are asymptomatic and have not been in any contact with symptomatic person's. I think limiting the visitors as you are doing is good too. It sounds like you are being conscientious regarding social interactions in this pandemic.

My father is 95, I don't have stopped his caregivers even he leaves with me. Because he does not stay home alone not even one minute. For my sanity I can not take care of him 24 hours. What I am doing is measuring everybody washes hands before enter the house and wear mascara. So far so good.

Mmym

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I do not think is good idea.

Frequent phone calls are the key here. If you are still worried, set up a camera. Let his nearest neighbors know you are keeping in contact and share your phone number with them.

My Mom has 24 hour care at home and I have 6 caregivers sharing that responsibility. They are being as careful as they can, but she would die without them. So far, so good.

We're in lockdown but I go out regularly for food and meds for my parents - 87 and 84 - my dad has been having medical issues which is challenging. I have bought it groceries and tell my mom she can't go up and down the common-stairs- they are in an apt with 4 other families. I haven't really taken precautions besides washing hands I don't wipe down the groceries and it was a challenge to get her not to go out daily for bread and food - old school. Can I take them to my apt so the can sit on the terrace when the weather gets nicer or am I chancing everything? thanks for the checklist Suzanne

Recently, I did a whole checklist on this for my email subscribers. I am glad to share it with you if it will help...it is all the precautions we take at the clinics so Iet's simply pretend your home is my medical clinic...here ya go... https://bit.ly/2JhdcgZ

I hope it works. Just copy and paste..

Yes , mine is 90 and lives alone in an apartment because he still smokes🤷🏼‍♂️. I am his only assistance for food etc. he understands he should go nowhere but my husband and I fix meals and leave them , clean and get groceries . I sanitize each time and keep my distance but he would die otherwise and I trust our care more than anyone else since I don’t know if they are taking proper precautions!

As long as the caregivers, you and others, are good at social distancing, hygiene and frequent cleaning - it shouldn't be a problem. The goal is to limit exposure to a few trusted people, not to lock everybody up and never provide care.

My 90 year old dad doesn't leave the house except for doctor appointments. He has been self-quarantining for several years :-). My brother (who still works) lives with him and will be working from home starting Monday. I visit once a week to check on Dad and fill his medicine boxes and pay bills. I am careful to sanitize my hands before I touch anything. He does not want any of his home PT or nurses in the house until this virus is under control.

My husband is in your situation. Mother in law is 87. She gets food delivered through our county's office of the aging but sometimes needs help with the mail, etc. He goes 1-2 times per week. We try to minimize all other social interactions but it's tough as we are both essential personnel in our state and have to keep working. I would keep doing what you do, wash your hands often and keep disinfecting commonly used areas (doorknobs, faucets, etc.).

Similar situation here. It was very hard for my 93 year old mother to accept that I can't take her out several times a week, but I can bring her whatever she wants if I practice good hygiene and keep a distance from her. She's not happy about it, but understands that we're all staying home at this time due to the order from our state. I call her every day and let her talk as long as she wants and try to stay upbeat. She can be a very demanding and impatient person, but so far, so good. Remember the Benjamin Franklin axiom that “an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure”. Hoping and praying for everyone trying to keep our loved ones and ourselves safe throughout this time.

My 90 year old mother can handle an Ipad and that gives us the ability to clap eyes on her without exposing her to any viruses.

There are so many seniors receiving home care services that allow them to remain in the home. I think that if you are careful, weekly visits are going to be fine.

I'm in the same situation.
I had to leave home my mom's carers and there is no way that she could survive total social isolation for weeks. Also, this could be longer than weeks, think of Wuhan, they've been in a lockdown for 2 months.
My solution has been to become her only in-person carer + social contact ; for this I'm self-isolating completely too. I haven't been seeing anyone else for more than 2 weeks now and haven't gone out anymore. I also try to keep at 2m distance from her, no hugs, no sharing of glasses, dishes etc, as I could be potentially positive.
Just my 2 cents, because I think you have an important point here.

Try Netflix! It's free for 30 days. You can cancel any time. This has been
God sent to me. Also, no commercials. My wife an d I live alone. She
has Alzheimers and does not communicate very much. I am her only
caregiver at this time. This is our fun time in the evenings. We can watch tv
reruns and movies at anytime of the day or night. It takes a little while to
used to using Netflix but after that you will find it to be quite simple.

If he does not go out and does not have other visitors and you take precautions then he is pretty safe.
If/when you enter his house wash your hands.
Keep a distance from him.
Wash your hands before you prepare any food and before you eat.
If you do not feel well do not visit.