Carren, sorry your posting hadn't been answered in 5 days, you must have posted during a real busy day and the post got lost in the shuffle.
That’s a very common question asking about being paid. Majority of grown children do not get paid for caring for their parent, unless the parent is financially able to pay from their own pocket. If a parent can afford to pay you, the parent might as well hire a certified trained caregiver allowing you to keep a full-time job.
If you live in the States, see If your parent qualifies for Medicaid, the State might allow a trained Caregiver come in to help for a couple hours. Also check to see if your State is one of those States that has a “Cash and Counseling” program to help you out, it‘s worth looking into. Note that each State has their own rules, regulations, and programs.
Also contact your county agency on aging for programs such as Case Management, Meals on Wheels, Adult Day Care, housing, care referrals, etc,... go to the website link below.... click on your State.... now click on the city/county. https://www.agingcare.com/local/Area-Agency-on-Aging
And please come back to the forums if you have any Caregiving questions, we would be more than happy to share our experiences with you, and give you ideas on what to do.
A lot of us have the same question, but unless you have a parent or other relative to pay you, I'm not aware of any way to get paid. Some folks think that there are government funds to pay them to care for their parents; I think many of us would like to see that happen, but to the best of my knowledge, there's no such program.
These caregiving journeys are done for a variety of reasons: filial obligation, love, sense of duty, and more, but money isn't generally one of the available rewards.
Wouldn't it be nice if the government could pay us to help with our parents.... but that would mean our income taxes, sales taxes, property taxes, personal property taxes, and what ever taxes would all double to help fund such a program.... [sigh]
FF, yeah, we pay enough now to finance political junkets! There was a clip on one of the Canadian stations I listen to while driving about a woman who held an elected position at some level of government. I just don't remember all the details except the exorbitant funds she spent on her junkets. As I recall, there was no salary for her position, so she liberally availed herself of what funds there were to compensate for her service.
I never did figure out what funds she was dipping into.
I still think one of the most bizarre if not egregious instances is the congressman who eventually repaid $40,000 of costs for redecorating his office in the style of Downton Abbey. He's now resigned, but I'm sure that legacy won't quickly be forgotten.
Carren, this varies a lot from one state to another, so do check out your local resources. I believe that CA is one of the states where relatives can be paid to care for elders who would otherwise need a care center. Look up California Medicaid Home Care to get contact information.
I live in Minnesota and both a brother and a sister have been paid for providing care for our mother, before her needs finally required a care center. So I have a little different perspective on this than folks who are in states where that has not been possible.
Some limitations to consider: Depending on what kind of job you gave up and how much care your parent qualifies for, you may not come out "even" in this program. It can be very helpful, but it won't necessarily make up for not working.
You must be qualified for the work. My disabled brother was qualified to do homemaking (cleaning and laundry). It wouldn't support him but it was enough to supplement his disability payments and qualify him for an insurance program. He was very good with Mom and put in way may hours than he got paid for, but it did help that he could get some pay.
Mom lived with my sister for a year. Mom was eligible for a certain number of hours of caregiving, and Sis chose to provide those herself. She could also have chosen to have someone sent in that many hours a week. Sis was on-call 24 hours a day and she and her husband both put in MANY unpaid hours. The pay she got was helpful but mostly, she said, it validated that what she was doing had value in society.
Now Mom is in a nursing home, and no family members are getting paid. The earlier payments were MUCH less expensive for the state. Minnesota was a pioneer in doing this and many other states have recognized that it is generally less expensive to help keep an elder in the community, especially with the expansion of Medicaid under the affordable care act.
The notion that children can't/don't get paid for caring for their parents is changing rapidly. Find out what is available in the county where your parents live.
Yes you can have a care agreement written by a lawyer if she has one or one you might have the lawyer would be paid by her. Whatever amount that she can afford that would be fair to you .
I live in the state of Florida! I started the Medicaid application for my home last year! She lived with me! After she qualified I was able to be paid $10 an hour up to 35 hours a week!!
As many have stated, a lot has to deal with the state you reside. One other agency, in case it may benefit your situation, is the VA (Veteran's Administration) if your parent was a veteran (or spouse of one). As with many, the financial status of the parent is considered for various benefits, but there is the Aid and Attendance which would help pay for care. If you should go into an agreement with your parent, it would be wise to have a Caregiver Agreement drawn up. I saw an Elder Attorney who was very helpful and inexpensive. It helps keep things in line, and if Medicaid should become involved, the agreement would be beneficial. As many have said, the most likely source of any income would be an agreement with your parent, unless you are lucky enough to live in a state that is more geared towards these situations. Best of luck!
Even though most siblings will not help, I still think it is the right thing to do to gently and unemotionally and honestly tell them what is needed and what you are sacrificing to care for your - and their - parent. I asked one of my brothers who is financially very well off to help pay for extra caregivers when I needed them, and he agreed. Right now he pays for 1/2 but that is a great start.
The only way to really do this in most cases is have the parents pay the adult child.
People suggest the VA if a parent was a vet, well I know in 2013 the parent had to have less than 85K and that included their home, that disqualifies most people, even lower middle class.
OP like me lives in CA. If the parents own their home(and it sounds like they do) forget Medicaid which is called MediCal in CA. And with the 5 year look back, they can't even sign the home over to her, which would be foolish to do anyway.
irishboy, a home is an exempt asset when applying for Medicaid no matter what state you live in. That is a Federal mandate. The home is then subject to a lien and the state will recover their costs from it after the recipient dies. Some people may not want to do this, but it is definitely an option.
It depends. If they quailify for Medicaid, depending on your state, you might be able to get a stipend from a place like Caregiver Homes, http://www.caregiver homes.com or something similar, such as cash and counseling. They are all medicaid sponsored agencies and medicaid WILL put a lien on your parents assets, including property, after both of them pass.
You can look up or contact your state's DHS.gov (long term care) website for more specific information on whether or not your parents qualify for Medicaid and how to apply.
As I said, Medicaid WILL seek to be paid back. It's mandated by law. (their assets, not yours) so you'd be well advised to contact a good elderlaw attorney, before you apply.
There's also adult day care (like a day camp for elders) if they need an eye kept on them, which charge on a sliding income scale or Senior Centers if they have some mobility. That will give you some time during the day, for respite or if you have to work.
Nursing homes are like $7-10,000 PER MONTH! Taking care of them is less costly, but it's not free (medicaid) Feel free to contact me, if I can answer any questions, about my journey.
I live in Florida and my mother has medicaid. Under her long term care portion of that, they pay for a home health aide. I am that home health aide and I get paid a little over 10.00/hr, though she only gets 9 hrs a week of that service. So I am getting paid a small amount. I am sure if her condition changes, the hours would go up.
@pullupyourpants I was never told that Medicaid would want to be paid back and put a lien on assets. My mother is under the HCBS waiver, maybe that’s the difference.
My mom was on a home based care plan and even her social worker thought it was paid for by the state, but when she passed, they submitted their bill to medicaid. They won't come after your assets, but if she has a house, they expect you to sell it, when she dies.
A caregiver often gives up their job, which impacts them and their retirement income for the rest of their lives. I cared for my mother for 20+ years and depleted my savings before she was finally able to pay me something, which was when my father died and she got his social security. Only problem is she was too greedy to want to pay me and, even worse, my siblings supported her in this decision. Talk about no good deed goes unpunished!!? Where were my siblings when I was spending my own money to care for her, since her income was so low??? They could have cared less about that, they rarely lifted a finger to help me in any way during that time, but now want to criticize how her money was spent, after her death. I did finally get paid a very small amount for around-the-clock care, but I was made to beg for it each and every month, then hear the negative comments. Willows, as for your smart-a** comment above, no, your parents probably didn't get paid to take care of you when you were a baby and same for mine. The not-so-fine difference here is that our parents chose or their actions made the baby--their choice. Caring for a baby is not the same as caring for an aged parent--compare changing a baby's diaper to cleaning up after an accident your loved one had-- no comparison, believe me. My mother had diarrhea chronic for the entire time I cared for her, God rest her soul. I felt so sorry for her, I didn't complain about cleaning it up, but had to get a bigger washing machine for all the bedding, etc. Walking into the bedroom where she slept in the morning would be a challenge in itself, until I got things cleaned up. I used to have to put Vicks under my nose just to overcome the horrible odor and to keep me from throwing up while cleaning up. Just a couple of the things that you don't seem to consider when making your insensitive comments here.
dizzyrider, I feel so sorry for you that anyone could say anything derogatory to your plight. I hope you get everything you want in life and so much more for the sacrifice you did.
That’s a very common question asking about being paid. Majority of grown children do not get paid for caring for their parent, unless the parent is financially able to pay from their own pocket. If a parent can afford to pay you, the parent might as well hire a certified trained caregiver allowing you to keep a full-time job.
If you live in the States, see If your parent qualifies for Medicaid, the State might allow a trained Caregiver come in to help for a couple hours. Also check to see if your State is one of those States that has a “Cash and Counseling” program to help you out, it‘s worth looking into. Note that each State has their own rules, regulations, and programs.
Also contact your county agency on aging for programs such as Case Management, Meals on Wheels, Adult Day Care, housing, care referrals, etc,... go to the website link below.... click on your State.... now click on the city/county. https://www.agingcare.com/local/Area-Agency-on-Aging
And please come back to the forums if you have any Caregiving questions, we would be more than happy to share our experiences with you, and give you ideas on what to do.
These caregiving journeys are done for a variety of reasons: filial obligation, love, sense of duty, and more, but money isn't generally one of the available rewards.
I never did figure out what funds she was dipping into.
I still think one of the most bizarre if not egregious instances is the congressman who eventually repaid $40,000 of costs for redecorating his office in the style of Downton Abbey. He's now resigned, but I'm sure that legacy won't quickly be forgotten.
I live in Minnesota and both a brother and a sister have been paid for providing care for our mother, before her needs finally required a care center. So I have a little different perspective on this than folks who are in states where that has not been possible.
Some limitations to consider: Depending on what kind of job you gave up and how much care your parent qualifies for, you may not come out "even" in this program. It can be very helpful, but it won't necessarily make up for not working.
You must be qualified for the work. My disabled brother was qualified to do homemaking (cleaning and laundry). It wouldn't support him but it was enough to supplement his disability payments and qualify him for an insurance program. He was very good with Mom and put in way may hours than he got paid for, but it did help that he could get some pay.
Mom lived with my sister for a year. Mom was eligible for a certain number of hours of caregiving, and Sis chose to provide those herself. She could also have chosen to have someone sent in that many hours a week. Sis was on-call 24 hours a day and she and her husband both put in MANY unpaid hours. The pay she got was helpful but mostly, she said, it validated that what she was doing had value in society.
Now Mom is in a nursing home, and no family members are getting paid. The earlier payments were MUCH less expensive for the state. Minnesota was a pioneer in doing this and many other states have recognized that it is generally less expensive to help keep an elder in the community, especially with the expansion of Medicaid under the affordable care act.
The notion that children can't/don't get paid for caring for their parents is changing rapidly. Find out what is available in the county where your parents live.
People suggest the VA if a parent was a vet, well I know in 2013 the parent had to have less than 85K and that included their home, that disqualifies most people, even lower middle class.
OP like me lives in CA. If the parents own their home(and it sounds like they do) forget Medicaid which is called MediCal in CA. And with the 5 year look back, they can't even sign the home over to her, which would be foolish to do anyway.
Sorry, the only way is to have them pay you.
You can look up or contact your state's DHS.gov (long term care) website for more specific information on whether or not your parents qualify for Medicaid and how to apply.
As I said, Medicaid WILL seek to be paid back. It's mandated by law. (their assets, not yours) so you'd be well advised to contact a good elderlaw attorney, before you apply.
There's also adult day care (like a day camp for elders) if they need an eye kept on them, which charge on a sliding income scale or Senior Centers if they have some mobility. That will give you some time during the day, for respite or if you have to work.
Nursing homes are like $7-10,000 PER MONTH! Taking care of them is less costly, but it's not free (medicaid) Feel free to contact me, if I can answer any questions, about my journey.
I was never told that Medicaid would want to be paid back and put a lien on assets. My mother is under the HCBS waiver, maybe that’s the difference.
Willows, as for your smart-a** comment above, no, your parents probably didn't get paid to take care of you when you were a baby and same for mine. The not-so-fine difference here is that our parents chose or their actions made the baby--their choice. Caring for a baby is not the same as caring for an aged parent--compare changing a baby's diaper to cleaning up after an accident your loved one had-- no comparison, believe me. My mother had diarrhea chronic for the entire time I cared for her, God rest her soul. I felt so sorry for her, I didn't complain about cleaning it up, but had to get a bigger washing machine for all the bedding, etc. Walking into the bedroom where she slept in the morning would be a challenge in itself, until I got things cleaned up. I used to have to put Vicks under my nose just to overcome the horrible odor and to keep me from throwing up while cleaning up. Just a couple of the things that you don't seem to consider when making your insensitive comments here.