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My mother is redoing her will. I am the sole caretaker with my husbands help. She lives with us 100%. Are there any pertinent clauses that should be in the will? I feel there should be some financial reimbursement as I utilize my sick leave and vacation leave while my sibling carries on without any use of his time. I have totaled up my FMLA time used last year and it came to about $5000 (hourly figures) of the days I utilized for her hospital stay and doctor visits.

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Personally, I think it is a big mistake to postpone reimbursement until a will is settled. A child providing room and board and caregiving services should be paid for that on a monthly basis. That eliminates concerns about being fair to other children. The one who does the service gets the pay. Whatever is left can be split evenly in the will.

Another reason for realtime compensation is that it often happens that there is nothing left for anybody to inherit, if the parent needs costly medical care at the end of life. Now one child has made all the sacrifices and nobody gets any compensation.

Especially when there is more than one child, pay-as-you-go is the only fair approach, in my opinion.

Your mother doesn't know how much longer she will live and how much more care you will be providing. She doesn't know if she will need a care center before she dies. How can she determine today what might be just compensation for you in 5 years? In 10 years?

I guess I'm not answering your question. If this is the way your mother wants to handle it, I'm sure her lawyer can help her with the wording. Me? I'd have the lawyer help draw up a personal care agreement.
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I agree with jeanner gibbs - get compensated now for your caregiving duties. Don't wait for the will.
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It is completely up to your mother. It is difficult, parents often leave assets equally, because they love equally. If you need mom to make a financial contribution to your home, discuss it with her and get a agreement. She can contribute to household expenses and can pay you for caregiving.
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Any attempt to characterize one heir over another would look like undue influence, and the entire Will could be thrown out by a Judge. I strongly suggest you sit down with a lawyer, because your desire to punish your siblings with the wording of the Will can backfire on you and land you in court with a very unhappy Judge who can cut you out completely.
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I would talk to an attorney since this is such an important matter. You deserve most, if not all of the inheritance, if your sibling(s) lives in the area, has the time, and does nothing. Siblings that do not help out are extremely self-centered. Unfortunately, sibling(s) that "don't have the time" for caregiving, do indeed "have the time" when it comes to collecting the inheritance.
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Whitney speak to Elder law Atty.. Get a care agreement! You deserve compensation now.
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