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He just asks questions like our parent's birthdates and siblings and just questions about family members. Dad has moderate dementia so he cannot answer these questions. I have an uneasy feeling but I don't know if I am being overprotective as I have never had anyone take care of a loved one before. She is excellent with dad and treats him like her own dad so I am just concerned. Since dad cannot answer is this just normal talk that they do.

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We are fighting with some collection company trying to say we owe 2,000 for a security system we did not purchase. This is a fraud....we have a security system bought and paid for many years before this letter came to us. Never heard f the company and they don't deal even close to this stat. I looked them up on line-they had to change their name because of fraud.
They harass us several times daily. They won't send any documentation-say they don't have it. (Duh). And the only info they have is his name address and birthday.
Do No give out birthdates. I keep telling them to send what info they have and they say they don't have any.
I read about this collection place and they try to get you to send something back and it is determined that you do owe. It is crazy. No matter how many times I tell them we never heard of that company, they keep saying to send them a fraud notice. This has been going on for about 5 months.
Careful with the birthdates.
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I do believe in not trusting anyone.
The other day I was at Mom's NH and the activities professional was chatting with the residents getting them to liven up , make them remember things like holidays and birthdays etc. I'll tell you this my Mom had no idea what holiday was in December, but she undoubtedly knew the month day and year of her own birthday.
One woman on hospice just came back from the hospital and just days before was not able to do much at all, remembered her daughters birth date, and a smile came over her face because she was remembering something about her daughter. So the caregiver may simply want to see if the answers are clear to them.
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Maybe she is into horoscopes?
I would ask 'Why do you want to know?"
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I would not give out personal information, like birth dates. Now days the less you say the better off you are.
There are plenty of other things to talk about.
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She just lost her mom last may and her mom had dementia. So I don't know if she is just that sincere. She has never hidden anything from me and when I checked out her information before I hired her, it was all correct. I just don't know. I am a very overprotective person and always have been. She tries to do different things with him I think to activate his mind and get him to speak more and dad is better. He is more verbal and interactive. I just get scared in this day and age as you never honestly know if you can trust someone. I know there are good people out there and I hope she is one of them. My boss helped me interview her and she told me you could tell she was a very compassionate person.
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As an ex PI, I agree that's rather unsettling and she should know better. Giving her the benefit of the doubt, she may just trying to get him thinking about those dates to keep his mind active.

I'd tell her it makes you a little uneasy and while you don't think she'd use the information for something ilicit, you'd prefer she stick to less controversial subjects. That will put her on notice that you're antenna is up... If she had something in mind, she'll think twice.
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I had a horrible experience with a caregiver. She told me she loved my mom like her own. That should've been a huge neon sign for me but I wanted to believe the best. Big mistake. If your gut indicates a problem then there could be one. Keep a very close eye on her. She may be super friendly or she may be up to no good. I think there are a multitude of fantastic caregivers out there but there are also plenty of them who keep families in lawyers offices too.
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