My father has three children. He has always stated that he does not want son 2 to have decision making over his health or finances. Son 2 lives closest. Father becomes confused, is hospitalized, recovers and has mild dementia. Son 2 has POA. Father doesn't remember how this happened or when and does not want son 2 in charge. Son 2 will not allow information to other sons. Places father in lock down memory unit. Father does not want this situation. Father can clearly indicate consistently that he doesn't want Son 2 as POA. Son 2 will not allow father to be taken for eval to his PCP. Son 2 will not allow access to records. Son 2 will not talk on phone to siblings. Advice?
Let me say you don't just move someone to memory care. The patient is evaluated by a medical team prior to admission.
Son 2 is dealing with an angry patient and siblings who want to debate the degree of dementia that Dad has. That cycle of clarity to confusion and back again gets shorter and shorter until it is minute by minute. Been there. Fortunately mom did not act out aggressively. If she had, we would have had to move her to a locked unit for the safety of all concerned.
This is one situation in which I think you need to consult an elder law attorney, STAT. And ask about how to get access to the medical records, which will be difficult if your father isn't mentally cognizant to authorize it.
Do you know if there is a co-proxy under the POA?