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I’m self employed and can’t afford to take days off of work when taking her to Dr appointments. Can I pay myself using her money? I do have all POA for her.

Does your mom live at home?

You can do a care contract with her that compensates you for your time. Being a boots on the ground caregiver is NOT part of being ANY POA, so you can absolutely be paid for providing services outside of those actual duties.

I would caution you to only pay the going rate for those services, otherwise it is suspicious and iffy, as the POA.

You will need to keep detailed records of time and care or service provided. If you lose a whole day because of a doctor's appointment, I would encourage you to schedule them later in your work day, you will raise flags getting made whole, as it were.

I would use an attorney to draw up the agreement, they will keep you within the law if you are completely transparent about what you want to do. Your mom's money will pay for the contract and it should be written in a way that you can use it for hiring outside aides.
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Reply to Isthisrealyreal
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That's definitely a frequently asked question here! If you click on the search glass, look up the article How to Get Paid to Be a Caregiver for Parents. Lots of good information which may be of use.

Best wishes for your business and your caregiving.
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Reply to ravensdottir
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Also look into gifting the money for your time !!! Caregivers are diff to find that are reliable and I have had to take multiple days off work to fill in for daily care…. No other family willing to help! I did it feee (lost time / wages) for 8 months - no more ..
I’m being now gifted for my “time” fair wage - way less than agency caregivers..
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Reply to jules925
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I would HIGHLY advise you not to.
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Reply to mommabeans
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No, you can't.
At the point you begin to TAKE money from your mother without her willingly paying you (and being competent to do so) you clearly need to consult an attorney. Failure to do so may see your mother disqualified from governmental assistance in future and may see you in jail.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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*Maybe get set up for Caretaker Pay. Or, hire a caretaker to transport her to her appointments. You can still work, she's taken care of & you won't get into any trouble if there's anyone looking into your mom's business wondering what's going on!
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Reply to CaliTexasGirl
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You said days off. Are you referring to x amt of days in a month. Your self employed and you cant switch your time around? I would understand if you had to ask your employer for time off that might create issues at work. But again you are your own boss. There are places that would take your mom to her appointments. Depending where you live some have free rides. Check with your area on aging all counties have one.
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Reply to LoniG1
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You need to have a written agreement preferably written up by an attorney or at the very least, notarized. You will also need to pay taxes on this money. You need to keep good records showing how much you got & what you did for the money ( taking to Dr. appts, cleaning, assisting with dress/ grooming, etc.) If this is not done, it can be considered gifting & if it ends up being over the allowed amount, that can cause problems with Medicaid if needed later for LTC. (Speaking from experience)
At the very least, do a free consultation with an attorney.
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Reply to Ltracy
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Is POA is active, I wouldn't take a thing! If not ask mom for some help if she's cognizant. Remember that she's going to need everything she has to continue her care down the road! As mentioned, wasted finances could ruin her ability to claim Medicare for assisted living/MC when needed. We've all lost time and money being caregivers with no appreciation or reimbursement in the end. We've all had to run out of work at the drop of the hat countless times!! Once,I had to run out because I was talking to her and then nothing!! She was OK! She dropped her phone and picked up the remote instead! Well, that's a waste of time and money, but it was for my mom,priceless!! In my state,they've got Metro Mobility which is an ordered pickup service,they help them on and off. I do understand being with her on Dr visits allows you input on her care and where its going. Ask for the Dr's reports to be sent home with mom if you can't make it.
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Reply to JuliaH
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Kerrydolan: You cannot do so.
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Reply to Llamalover47
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Good grief... I'm new here but I'm really surprised at how many people are so sure of themselves (& your situation) yet don't site sources or post credentials. 🙄
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Reply to LoopyOptimist
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JuliaH Aug 15, 2025
These are people who have been there, done that. Some have had to pay legal fees for the information and others learned the hard way. They speak from their own experience and hardship, It's an advice forum, nobody has to take it. You can't begin to imagine all the legalities that are involved when you obtain power of attorney (POA). Everything lands on you and if done improperly, you could lose everything you own as well as the people you're caring for. It's up to the reader to absorb the information and figure out what's best for their situation. Some people are registered in a certain area and others have gone so far that they passed away before their loved ones. We don't want to see that happen so we share our stories of the journey we've been on and hope to make the next person's journey easier for them. Welcome to the Forum!
(1)
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Please consult with an attorney with expertise in Eldercare. Each state has its own regulations regarding payment of services and how it applies or is excluded from POA. The attorney can guide you best.

If there is compensation for gas, tolls, mileage they will need to have receipts and support documentation. If you are looking for a per hourly wage that would be more complex and require contracts especially if your POA is enacted.

Perhaps it would be more beneficial to hire a geriatric case manager. Again, consulting with an attorney would be best in this situation.
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Reply to AMZebbC
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Is she mentally capable of managing her own funds and paying bills?
If so, then it is up to her to compensate you for your time.
There are other options; you can hire a driver to take her to appointments. There are organizations which specialize in taking elders and disabled to doctor appointments.

If she is unable to manage her own funds, and you feel you should be compensated for your time, then document it, and pay yourself an amount comparable to hiring a medical transport driver. - Hiring a professional may actually be covered by her insurance.
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Reply to CaringWifeAZ
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