My mother is 82 and is declining. We just saw her doctor on 4/25. I also have a 60 year old sister who is developmentally disabled and I help my mom and sister by taking them to the bank, grocery store, hair cuts and medical appointments. My mother and my stepdad (died almost 3 years ago) and that's when I stepped up. I have two other siblings that do nothing or even a phone call. My sister had been able to hold down a job and has savings in the six figures and my mother has an estate worth in the six figures. My mother nor my sister have ever given me money. And I have been driving them around for 3 years. I don't work because I'm disabled (I'm in the process of applying for disability) and I spend what savings my husband and I have. I am resentful because we're using our future retirement money on my mom and sister. What can and should I do. Any answer would be helpful. Thank you.
Neraf2015, how can I get a no trespassing warrant?
I do understand that I can't get paid by the state for taking care of my mom and sister. I just can't do it any more. I'm done. I go to two different doctors twice a week for myself and I barely can get there. Taking my mom is a chore. I'll have to talk to my mom about a nursing home and my sister may have to go to a group home. The stress is overwhelming. Thank you everyone for your responses.
Sadly you will need to chalk it up as one very serious lesson learned. If your Mom and sister need help, then they will now need to help pay for the caregiving, your Mom can afford it. Either Mom pays you or she pays an Agency for a caregiver. If she pays you, then you need to set up an employment agreement stating the number of hours you will work and at what hourly rate, and who will pay the payroll taxes.
Now my concern is that you have applied for disability, I wonder what the State would say if they found out you are caring for two people driving them here and there? And what if Mom does start to pay you for her care?