My Mom, 81, has dementia (possibly LBD) and Psychosis of Parkinson's. She has typical Sundowning type behaviors but this is more severe. She often becomes frantic during dinner that she must leave immediately so as not to be late for something. She runs around and grabs her purse and perhaps some files and papers and firmly asserts that she's leaving. For much of her adult life she was running to evening meetings, classes, rehearsals, etc. I'm very open to any suggestions because it was real bad tonight. We got in the car and drove around for 40 minutes and I could sense her gradually getting calm. 3 nights ago she was similarly agitated so I had my out-of-state sister call her. They talked (Mom talked non-stop, sister listened) for an hour which was a wonderful break for me. I used to be able to say "Oh, that meeting is not tonight" but that's not working now. Grateful for any tips.
Wine may not be the best choice for her,( you maybe.?..) as it does interact with other medications, is a depressant, and can cause her to feel off balance and fall.
I think the suggestion of the celexa type medication is very good. These types of medications are antidepressants and act on chemicals in the brain and may make her feel calmer and less anxious. They may take a couple of weeks to work best. ( though you may see some good results right away).
Hope these suggestions were helpful, and don't forget about taking care of you too.
Also, if she starts to get up to get ready to rush to a meeting, what if you say that they called and cancelled the meeting that night and they will send out the new time and date the next day. She's not likely to remember if you do that each day.
If my cousin gets anxious, which is greatly reduced since she went on meds, but, I will say that I have made a phone call and everything is now fine. That works for her.
My Dad, before he passed, would stand outside his facility in the pouring rain at 11:00 pm waiting for his daughter to come pick him up for church. A nurse told him she had called and his daughter was ill. The nurses then hid his shoes from him, and he spent the evenings hunting for them. But at lest he wasn't out in the pouring rain or walking down dark streets.
If you can create a schedule of work at home, she and you can have meetings together. Perhaps she can even plan some meetings for the two of you.
If you mom's behavior change has intensified suddenly I would suggest having her check by her doc. She may have a UTI or some other type of infection.
I think with my Dad, he would go to the main dining room for dinner. After eating he would go back to his room and doze off with the TV on.... thus wake up and in his mind he was back in the 1940's as that was when he use to take the bus to work. The hotel was his room at Memory Care.
Maybe get one of those pink "while you were out" notepads for telephone calls and write down "meeting was postponed until next Monday".... "meeting cancelled due to weather".... "meeting cancelled, power outage".
I was able to distract my Dad by changing the subject over to the weather, which was his hobby.
Is your mom on medication for this behavior? I would think that being frantic wouldn't feel so good to her, maybe her Dr. can prescribe an anti-anxiety medication.