Need to vent a bit, friends. I’ve been upset about this since Friday and it’s not going away. Where else to come but...here?
Husband has not been feeling well for two weeks. I brought a cold home from the daycare where I work and he got it. Because he is bed bound and immobile, he is still coughing and coughing. I obviously cannot get him to the doctor so I contacted my very unfavorite home visit physician agency. For some reason, they have put us onto a home healthcare agency. Their nurse has been out three times in a week. She is very outspoken about the way we live. She points out every lapse in housekeeping and does not approve of our animals. She says the presence of the animals could be contributing to my husband’s issues. She does it in a mildly threatening, derogatory way. The house IS messy. I KNOW this. But threats and insults won’t prompt me to organize it. I couldn’t imagine going into another woman’s home and doing what she has done to me. She doesn’t know our circumstances and doesn’t seem to want to know. She has told me I should quit my job so I will have more time to clean. She doesn’t have an idea of how the (little) money I make would be replaced. She doesn’t seem to understand that before I got this job, we couldn’t even afford a tube of toothpaste. The bank had preprinted overdraft notices for us. I suspect her next crusade against me will be my handling of the finances.
If she would, as the old Indian proverb says, “walk a mile in my moccasins”, I’d be more willing to listen to her. I know she most likely wants to help. She did mention that she’d been reported for her tactics previously. I can understand why. I feel like an absolute worthless fool when she’s here. My stress level skyrockets. She is also brutal and insulting to my husband. Last Friday, she as much as said she will report us if I don’t take steps to get the house organized. There are no bugs in our house; no mold and no rotting trash. Yes, it’s disorganized. But for six years, my life has been one trauma after another. It occurred to me this weekend that the worry over my husband has been constant for 16 years, since his stroke, a third of the time we have been married. This nurse doesn’t know and doesn’t seem to care about any of that.
I hesitate to call and ask for someone else. My husband needs care. So far, she really has done nothing for him. She said she would ask their patient coordinator for something for his cough but we are still waiting. Meanwhile, with his heart issues, I’m sitting here terrified.
Thanks for letting me vent. ❤️👍🏻