My siblings have not helped me at all with my parents. Now all of a sudden they are "worried" about me. My brother does not agree with my parents living in independent or assisted luving..or paying for caregivers. He and his wife think they can do a better job at caring for my dad with dementia so they can keep the $$$$ for themselves.
My brother thinks that he is better suited to care for them..and that you just have to know how to "handle" my dad. He told my sister he will move them into his house and can lock them in when he needs to. He is completly clueless about dementia and what it is actually like on a day to day basis, He thinks that my parents will be like they were 10 years ago when they would visit on vaca.
So...his plan is NOT to support me in getting them in an assisted living when the time is right..or to leave them where they are now and hire caregivers. He plans to schlep them 1000 miles away, and badically let his wife care for them....and all this because he claims this will "help" me....i am sure this is all money oriented.
So..if he takes them cross country i will be completely out of caregiving...and their lives. Caring for them is difficult and I do need help..but they are the only family I have now...i would be mortified to have them "care" for them..and probably more stressed about the possibility of them being abused.
Anyway..i have known all along this is why he has never supported me or attempted to help me. Also my mom is very stubborn and will not give anyone POA. I wanted us all to get together and get POA from mom.
Anyway just venting.. Of course if i dont take this offer...then he will say...well..we offered..you are on your own.